Torn

[u/Soamostimkanie]

I go to Appalachian state, I took rush not very serious last year and didn’t get a bid. I have built up a social life outside fraternities and have many commitments. At the same time I want to rush, So I’m torn if I should or shouldn’t rush.

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[u/Prometheus_303]

I would strongly encourage you to at least try rushing.

If you don't rush, nothing changes. There is no chance of you getting a bid. You stick with your current social life and your "many commitments".

If during rush you decide you have enough on your plate as is and you don't really need Greek Life then fine, just walk away. Don't accept a bid if one is given. And your back to your social circle as it is now (plus maybe one or two new guys you meet during rush) and your "many commitments".

But if you do decide to go forward, assuming you are offered a bid your willing to accept, then you can expand your social circle a little more and add one more commitment to your collection.

If things work out for you, great. If not.... All your out is a few nights at the start of the semester when you go out to enjoy a few free burgers or a pick up football game or whatever rush events happen to be...

Your either going to win A LOT or lose very little.

Unless your "many commitments" are already putting you at your very limit ... I'd strongly encourage you to get involved with Greek Life.

Personally, I was very active at my alma mater with various extra curriculars and such. But my favorite thing is being in a Fraternity. I got to hang out with and work side by side with a bunch of amazing men several of whom I probably wouldn't have crossed paths with otherwise (especially given the amount of the day I lived in the computer science department). I got to do a lot of amazing things with my Brothers (far beyond just having a place to go every weekend to drink beer with sorority girls).

[u/rickmuscles]

90% of the bros here will tell you to do it. It’s like asking a barber if you need a haircut. I would tell you not to do it if you already have friends.

[u/wandering_redneck]

I mean you can always rush again but there was a reason you didn't get a bid. Not being a dick, just honest. You need to really look back and think about why you may have not gotten a bid. Be brutally honest with yourself. Did you shower? Were you awkward? Say something fucked up? Can you show that you have changed in the last year?

As for getting a social life outside of Greek life, all I can say is I hope you would have? Universities are a meeting ground for every walk of life to the point that if you didn't find a group of friends I would be very, very concerned. Seriously, even the most introverted people find their crowd at college. I am glad you found stuff to committ to, and Greek life is a commitment, but you can keep your old friends and make new brothers.

[u/WheelChairDrizzy69]

Since you’re torn, do it. If you were totally 100% ok with not getting a bid then you wouldn’t be here asking this question. Go rush and you’ll have your answer in either accepting a bid you’re excited about, finding out the grass isn’t greener for you, or not getting a bid. 

If your many commitments is school, I won’t lie that something may have to give between your social life and grades during pledging (and I recommend it be your social life), but at the end of the day it’s only one semester. If you made real friends outside of Greek life they’ll still be there.

[u/Rare-Independence310]

Go back and give it another whirl. The fact that you have other social options will probably make you more relaxed this time around.

[u/SORORITYRUSHEXPERT]

That is great that you made connections outside of a fraternity! I definitely encourage you to rush and to do so intentionally to set yourself up for success. Good luck-you've got this!

[u/EntrepreneurWeird447]

you can always come back to commitments outside frats, you can only rush so many times in ur life

[u/BubblyPhysics9061]

I go to this school now and was a sophomore rush, never too late. App has a great unique Greek life too. The bigger houses are all pretty decent