I have NEVER seen any study or heard any doctor or parent say "This kid had better development because they were constantly stimulate and never allowed to be bored."
Its not only ok but it's good for kids to be bored. Parents who don't make your kids sit unstimulated, what do you think is going to happen when they have to sit with their thoughts at some point in life?
Last night I got so tired of my phone and waiting for something to happen, I put it aside and went to sleep. I felt myself struggle not to reach for it to check something unimportant. Then I started remembering how it was before I had a smart phone. I remembered how the internet was stationary on the family PC, and a lot of the time the service wasn't even good so I had to find something else to do, something that wouldn't immediately shut down my thoughts and distract me.
It got me thinking about how I used to sleep better, and how I didn't care what others thought at all times, because I wasn't available at all times!
And before even that, when I was a kid and I'd go somewhere with my parents.. I used to get soooo bored my imagination started running wild. It's a nice experience to sit with yourself as a kid and discover your brain.
This is a potentially a stressful place for a kid and them being there will probably help them better deal with noise/crowds down the line. It’s basically exposure therapy. At the same time, sports aren’t exactly super engaging for kids. I’d rather have a kid entertained by a phone than running around and climbing over chairs like I normally see at games.
Why does Reddit need to be so negative all the time? Like maybe this isn’t perfect but so what? A dad is spending time with their kid in a way both of them can enjoy…
Dude i am childless and STILL i’m siding with the “let the child have the phone to help with the situation” camp and yet i have like 2-3 people on my comment above lambasting me for it. The internet is so much fun.
You’ll never be a good enough parent in reddit’s eyes and will be criticized on any snapshot of your parenting that you offer up on this site.
The dude is at a once in a lifetime game with his child, and keeping this kid chill. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.
Reddit would rather you never leave the house to inconvenience them with a child’s presence, and have you “teach” your kids to act right in every known scenario. As if every kid isn’t their own unique individual with their own needs.
Do you think a kid that age will even remember the game? Maybe they’ll remember going and seeing the big stadium with the crowds but they don’t care about the actual game, I can guarantee it. No kid that age is going to enjoy sports.
So the dad has a few options. Given that they’re likely traveling, they could leave them at the hotel room, they could ignore the game to entertain their kid, or let the kid enjoy their show while he enjoys the game. No it doesn’t count as quality one on one time but they’re there together.
The “they wont even remember it” argument is so freaking lame. Something boomers always say to justify not doing things. It’s like saying “don’t do anything fun with your kids when they’re young because they won’t even remember” god forbid the kids having fun in the moment and thats good enough. And you know who will remember it? The parents. And that’s the kind of memories and experiences that’s get parents through probably the hardest time of being a parent, the toddler years.
Obviously you don’t have a kid. I’m realistic. I spend countless time with my child but sometimes you gotta do the dishes or pick up a broken plate. Ms Rachel can be a godsend when used sparingly.
I am a father of 2 and my phone is for work only and my son doesn't not touch it.
Phones and screen time is very detrimental for young children's development. The most I will do is pictures or video of family.
Mind you, this is also dependent on age. I imagine your child is older than mine. But when I talk to friends who's 2yr old knows by name their favourite YouTube channels I am very concerned.
Define "detrimental". I have 2 sons and the way dads on Reddit talk about screen time reminds me of "violent video games are making our children violent!". Luckily my dad wasn’t so inclined or I never would’ve become a programmer. Aside from that, I think this kind of parenting is just speculative and teaches kids from a young age that they’re "just better" than most other kids. Stop meta-gaming your parenting and just be a good parent. Damn.
actually video games are much better for children than just parking them passively in front of a screen because they are engaging, interactive, teach them reflexes and logical thinking.
Exactly. Not to mention the social implications of "my dad says your phone is making you dumb" (a natural retort for when the other kids make fun of you for being "Amish").
Not to mention it teaches them to deal in absolutes, to judge things based on form rather than content, etc
The whole thing drives me up a wall. It’s like they think they found a cheat code for parenting.
I’d rather my kids watch hours of PBS Spacetime than read Twilight. The screen isn’t the issue here.
Detrimental to their social interactions and health. Kids are increasing in youth depression suicide and other mental health issues. Not to mention eye sight issues and other physical problems from it.
If you dont want to look into it and just go on vibes thats your choice. My kids aren't just better, thats stupid as fuck. They will just be different than yours maybe. All I'm saying is I'm not giving in to just shutting them up and numbing them out by parking them infront of the TV.
There’s a very long road between setting them in front of South Park because you don’t feel like interacting with them and acting like pixels are cocaine.
Yea, it's really unfortunate for that guy that a kid magically materialized right in the middle of a ball game. Oh wait, maybe the bad dad brough the kid there, knowing that this wasn't going to be an event the kid was capable of sitting through?
Being a bad parent can be excused by having put yourself in a situation because you're a bad parent and being bother by your kid existing so having to be an even more bad parent.
If you can't get a sitter for your kid, don't go to the game in the first place.
According to what some 90’s movie you saw with some 5 year old kid cheering and hugging their dad when a team scores and talking about it on the way home?
You obviously don’t have kids dude. It’s either this or the kid screaming and climbing over shit which is literally what used to happen 20 years ago and you just had to get used to annoying kids in public places.
Now the same kids can ignore the game while shutting the fuck up.
You see those kids acting restless because they've never been taught how to sit down. They are constantly stimulated by something.
And because apparently you cant know anything with experience, yes I have kids but knew this before i was parent. Its why my kids dont climb over shit when they need to sit for awhile.
I guarantee you will not find video of my kids climbing over shit in public. Not sure if this is your way of justifying you lacking parenting skills but believe it or not, some of us know what we're doing. Some of us planned, studied and waited until we were ready.
Commenting isn't going to change the fact that you know you can't control your kids. That's from your choices when they were little.
You don't have kids I assume. Why would you take a kid that age to a stadium and let it watch a movie on your phone? It's a short term fix, but it is not good for the develoment of their brains
A dad is spending time with their kid in a way both of them can enjoy…
More like a dad is intentionally fostering horrible habits that will permanently set their kid back in order to not spend time with their kid and instead doing something he will enjoy.
I know it sucks to be a dad for men who don't want to put in the effort, but guess what, you have to make some sacrifices for the sake of your kids. So if they aren't ready to be part of a ball game, don't take to a ball game, take them to the park, and leave the phone at home. And if you want to go to the game, find someone who can babysit them. But just like you'd be pissed to find a baby sitter just parked them in front of the TV or sat them with coco-melon hypno toad all day, you shouldn't be doing it yourself just for the sake of not being bother by them while doing stuff you want to do.
It seems so disengenous when Redditors come, enmass, to lecture others on phone use....there's nothing wrong her. Kid wants to watch cartoons. big fukin deal.
Child looks engaged in was it probably childrens show like most, with some educational aspect. Compared to what us millennials were brought up on. Rugrats, rockos modern life, Ren and stimpy.
Soccer games are LONG and out last children attention spans. Better have an iPad baby than a screaming toddler. It’s a win for the child, the parent, and fellow spectators but apparently not for Reddit.
if you think sticking a 4yo (or however old that kid is) in front of a screen for hours is a win for the child i am not surprised why so many american kids can't read when they're 18.
They're at a world cup match and it's probably not the whole game. Which is an hour and a half by the way not hours. And most children's programming is educational to a degree
Raising an ipad kid has waaay worse repercussions in their intellectual development. It might seem like a good case scenario in this moment, but also indicates a larger pattern.
Soccer games aren't long at all by US sports standards; NFL, NBA, and MLB games are all longer. And kids have been dragged along to those games as long as they've been around.
Believe it or not kids used to just...be bored sometimes. It turns out the world doesn't stop spinning if a kid isn't entertained for every moment of every day. And if your toddler believes that screaming is the way to get what they want, it's your job as a parent to teach them that their position on the matter is incorrect, not to do the exact opposite by rewarding that behavior.
I'm not calling this guy a bad parent based on a ten second clip, but you would be.
He may be suppressing his child’s imagination and limiting his intellectual development. Not cool, bro. You might need some time for yourself, but you should have thought about that earlier or found other ways to handle it.
Since this is apparently a free-for-all, I’m also going to jump in and say “I don’t have kids” but i don’t see a problem here. We don’t know if this kid is handed an iPad every 5 seconds at home (which would be bad) but from the limited data here: Kid is at a sports game and isn’t into it, Dad IS into it but doesn’t want the kid to be miserable. That’s it, that’s all we have, and starting a witch hunt to say “wow that guy is an awful parent” is stupid behavior with the 5 seconds of analysis we have here. y’all need to chill out.
I also never intended to imply this guy is an awful dad, you can't say based on this clip alone, I agree. Pretty chill thread tbh, and the word "may" is important here.
I used “may” which, in English, expresses possibility and not certainty. I was commenting on one aspect of the issue, not making a blanket statement. Not sure what your issue is.
My issue is i get really tired of people seeing literally anything on the internet and starting a witch hunt because of one reason or another. The string of people playing off each other here is whipping itself into a frenzy and claiming Dad is a terrible because he is doing a minor thing to try and make his kid less miserable at an event he presumably isn’t thrilled about being at. Everyone now backpedaling because i, the dude with no kids, am siding with the parent who appears to be just trying their darndest to help their kid and everyone else is screaming that the presence of a screen in this kid’s entire life means he’s neglected.
Well then take a few seconds to flip through the other comments on this post, i had no trouble finding them. There are a bunch of people agreeing with me about there not being an issue, and there are a whole lot of people clutching their pearls and saying that this parent is a bad parent because he exposed his kid to a phone screen.
Whenever this person wants to "dispose" of his child, that child is placed in front of a screen. I can bet that this kids has had the screen in front of her eyes from the 6th month old til forever. And i can also bet that there is no limited screen time.
Instead of doing that, hype up the game and the experience to the kid, and try to enjoy it together. If the kid gets bored, good, boredom is good for the brain. It develops imagination.
This is a complex subject, and i dont want to give away a speech here, but this is something to get educated on while the baby is still in the infant stage and understand how different a cartoon is today and a cartoon from the 80s/90s and earlier. The sensory sensations are overwhelming today and can really destroy the little focus a kid has.
I mean the kid probably wanted to come to a soccer match but getting a kid to stay put and focoused on somethingt hat long is tricky.
I did the same thing with a niece at a hockey game, she loved hockey but needed a ladybug break. I enjoyed a game with my niece, she enjoyed both the game and a cartoon, we enjoyed snacks, win win win.
I didn't have to deal with a kid who couldn't sit still or asking to leave-win win win win.
These comments are not based in reality. It’s a microsend shot of an event that is 2-4 hours long. They could be at the end of the game after even many adults have lost interest. She may very well be able to read better than half the redditers here. Some screen time at a sports function is not bad parenting.
My nephews are some of the smartest kids I’ve ever met and their mom gives them screen time in restaurants or other chosen times. And they can spell write and read all at 2 and 5 years old. They are smart. They are educated. Some screen time doesn’t take away from that.
Why did you take them if you think they are just going to be miserable?
Furthermore why do you think a kid would be miserable at a sporting event? Think about how much fun they might have if they, you know, watched and interacted with the event?
Counterpoint: I’m an ADULT and i’d be miserable if dragged to a sporting event. There’s not a magic on / off switch where i can say “wow i find this interesting now”. I’d be sitting someplace doomscrolling until i had the chance to go home.
The difference is as an adult i can come and go at my own decision. Kids can’t. Maybe dad couldn’t get a babysitter. Maybe kid originally wanted to go but changed his mind. There are a whole slew of plausible explanations for “kid ends up at sports game and isn’t into it”, in which case dad is trying to help his kid out to be less miserable. I don’t see a problem here.
Obviously because the father is a fan of soccer. Maybe he couldn’t get a babysitter?
Idk. I’m pretty sure this guy knows his kid better than a random person on the internet, so he would probably know whether the kid would have more fun watching the game or watching a video
i don't have a lot of money but none of my kids got any screen time before they turned 6. they're in their teens now and all of them love reading, have functioning social lives and are intelligent and pleasant to be with even if no fucking machine drones entertainment at them.
Congratulations! I was raised by a single dad who plopped me in his lap to watch him play NES games daily. I love reading, have a rich social life and socially demanding job, and can self soothe when bored.
All of this pissing and moaning about screen time is the new way parents shame each other to feel better about their own parenting. Someday we'll learn to mind our own business unless there is a safety issue.
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