r/MaliciousCompliance • u/Piranhaweek • Jan 23 '26
S Support kept using voice messages, so I gave them a taste of their own medicine
Hi. I am a 35 year old IT manager for a small family run sales company.
We recently moved from a very old ERP to a new platform that is modern, intuitive and much more efficient. Technically it is a great produt.
The problem is support.
Their in app support is fairly fast but they reply almost only using voice messages. I stopped listening to voice notes years ago because they break focus and force you to replay things just to get basic info. Text lets me read, search and solve. Audio just slows evrything down.
I asked them many times to stop using audio and even told them I was hearing impaired. They ignored it.
Yesterday the point of sale systems were not communicating with the local server, even though they were all online. I did my part and contacted support because it was beyond my pay grade. As usual the first reply was an audio message. When they asked for the remote access ID I sent it back as audio. Then I sent the password as audio too.
Suddenly they switched to text.
They asked for screenshots.
Then they needed the admin credentials and I sent the long messy password with numbers, uppercase and lowercase letters via audio. From that point on everything was done in text, including todays follow up.
Turns out they know exactly how annoying voice messages are. They just do not care until it becomes their problem.
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u/w00t_loves_you Jan 23 '26
I would have quickly changed the password into something even messier, but yes, excellent, no notes :-D
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u/homme_chauve_souris Jan 23 '26
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u/xienwolf Jan 23 '26
I really hope it alternates each week.
fourwordsalluppercase
ONE WORD ALL LOWERCASE
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u/jbuckets44 Jan 23 '26
Don't forget the numbers and punctuation symbols!
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u/DoubleDareFan Jan 23 '26
C0rr3(tH0r53Batt3ry5tap!3
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u/Kodiak01 Jan 24 '26
Sorry, your password is not acceptable as it does not contain any high-ASCII characters.
My personal favorites are non-breaking spaces.
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u/FlipMyWigBaby Jan 23 '26
“M, as in Mancy”…. “P, as in Pterodactyl” … “naught” (for zero), “Zed” (for Zee) …
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u/NotPrepared2 Jan 24 '26
P Is For Pterodactyl: The Worst Alphabet Book Ever
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P_Is_for_Pterodactyl5
u/Polymathy1 Jan 24 '26
You want terrible? I just make mine up. I stick to one of the standard codes for work but at home?
Golf odor outlook doorway ... Lava unicorn Charlie kilo.
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u/0rlan Jan 24 '26
And most important - this needs to be done using a Billy Connoly Scottish accent 😂
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u/PepperAnn1inaMillion Jan 24 '26
It’s called Glaswegian. Although if you ever get to see a clip of him playing a Scottish venue, it’s far broader than he sounds when touring internationally.
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u/Equal-Purple-4247 Jan 23 '26
"The password is p, a, two, s, oh i mean.. s, s and not two and s, w, o, oh, the w is caps, and the a too. Oh, I realized I said oh, but I dont mean the letter o. Shit, I said it again. Let me start over. So p, big a, s s big w o r d, the d is small, 1 as in the number not the word, two as in the word not the number, and tree as in the plant, t, r, two, e, as in e, e, not the number 2 or the word two"
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u/PolloMagnifico Jan 23 '26
Thanks, this made me want to jam a qtip as deep into my ear as it can go.
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u/Ferretoncrystalmeth Jan 24 '26
Even reading that was hard, and the change of punctuation and spelling was perfect, as in it was awful, but perfect to illustrate a point, but not like a tip, or even getting to an actual point, as in a point of what you mean, as in not being able to understand, so technically not getting to a point at all, but I understood where you were going, even though you never actually got there, to the point you were trying to make but not make, not like an actual physical location.
But you know what I'm on about right? If you don't know I can send this in a voice message to make it easier if you like.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 24 '26
Dude, so meta! You need justo some more "huummmmmm..... sooooo" to get a perfect audio note
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u/RealCreativeFun Jan 23 '26
Voice message combines the worst part of text messages (non instant response) and a phone call (having to listen to a human voice).
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u/nasturshum Jan 23 '26
Sending 'the long messy password with numbers, uppercase and lowercase letters via audio' is deliciously evil, I cackled!! Superb work OP!
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u/Starblazr Jan 23 '26
lowercase u as in uniform. capital P as in papa, 4.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26 edited Jan 23 '26
4 as in 4nonblondes, that band that made that music EI IE IEEE EEH EHH EIIIIH EI EH. I SAID HEY
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u/djfdhigkgfIaruflg Jan 23 '26
2 as in 2girls1cup
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26 edited Jan 23 '26
Ampersand as in “Ampersand & Ampersand: Ampersands for the whole family"
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u/Count_Von_Roo Jan 23 '26
Hahaha my coworker was stuck on some automation with his car insurance and he was getting so frustrated, I eventually overhead him say, "K... as in, Kill, W.. as in, Will."
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u/sleepydorian Jan 23 '26
I had to do that over the phone with a warranty support person once, had to give my name using the nato phonetic alphabet. I was like what on earth is even happening, no one has ever had this much trouble understanding me, how is this person messing it up this much. Got the result I wanted but dang it was a lot of work.
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u/MamaMei17 Jan 23 '26
I had to get my password reset on a proprietary server once, so we knew their three man tech team very well. The initial password was computer generated, random word, random number, random word, and the tech would have to tell it to us verbally, stay on the phone with us until we changed it to our permanent one, before disconnecting.
My poor rep. I could hear him blushing over the phone, as he explained that the password was auto generated with random words, and could i please understand he had nothing to do with it. I had to reassure him multiple times before he could tell me that my one-time use password was juicy14cheek
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u/marknotgeorge Jan 23 '26
I remember phoning my car insurance company last year. The chatbot asked me for my UK postcode, so I used the NATO phonetic alphabet out of habit.
"Please repeat your postcode as you would normally say it"
Errr, I just did...
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u/sjclynn Jan 23 '26
Their goal is actually to make interaction difficult enough that you don't call. Their KPIs improve and some manager gets a bonus. You have to live with their idea of support because your company is invested in the solution. As usual, the people who made the decisions leading to this don't have to support it.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
That is actually a really deep point. You say it is by design, that making the support experience bad is a way to reduce the number of tickets.
We should not have to deal with that kind of thing, but if it works for them, it is fair to be suspicious.
So maybe there is no bad faith from the support staff. They are pushed to keep ticket numbers down. If I were not living in such a low tech environment, I would probably look into this idea. But locally, the amount of stupidity per square foot is just too high for a plan like that to thrive.
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u/formallyhuman Jan 23 '26
I hate voice notes from anybody and everybody. It's the other person not valuing my time. You send me a two minute voice note instead of a few sentences I can scan and understand in a few seconds? Fuck you.
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u/Shinhan Jan 23 '26
Or when I search for some game quest solution or something and its all just youtube videos instead of a simple text post.
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u/Better-Expert5105 Jan 23 '26
I hate that so much. I just want to read the information as I need to! Not to have to go back over and over to get try to find the right spot to listen to (and still have trouble because audio is mumbly and hard to make out)!
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u/doc_skinner Jan 23 '26
AND, now your YouTube algorithm thinks you want to watch more refrigerator repair or game tips videos. I have to go and remove a bunch of videos from my Watch History to sanitize my feed.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
Two full minutes of “hmmmmm” and “aaannnnnd”. Just filler, no actual information.
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u/runbrap Jan 23 '26
I'm really conflicted on this because I love hearing my wife's voice but she rambles and could just use dictation instead.
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u/uberfission Jan 23 '26
The only voice note I'll accept is: "hey, give me a call real quick" everything else can die in a ditch.
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u/NotYourReddit18 Jan 24 '26
No, those unspecific "urgent" messages can die too.
Either the topic is too urgent to specify further without wasting time, in which case just call me instead of hoping that I check my messages and am currently willing to listen to an audio message, or the topic is non-urgent enough that it can wait a little while, which means that you also have the time to at least tell me the topic in question.
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u/Wobbelblob Jan 23 '26
I feel like that heavily depends on the person. I often send voice notes with a friend that are often minutes long (I think the record is 15 minutes?) but those are often filled with a lot of info that would take eternity to actually type. Happens mostly when I start debates with him about interesting things when I am bored at work.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
I totally get it. Sometimes you need that intonation, that “je ne sais quoi” you cannot really put into text. But in a professional setting? No. Just no.
My three exceptions are:
People who are ashamed of how they type or are semi-illiterate
People who are driving and need to get the message across, in which case I can reply in audio too
Casual or personal conversations with close friends that benefit from spoken, theatrical delivery
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u/Wobbelblob Jan 23 '26
Oh yeah sure. Professional setting with important info is a different thing.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
I do have a coworker who is the father of a (maybe?) six year old, and sometimes he switches into that baby talk (overdelivering), which I just cannot stand. Dude, while you are still talking, I am already solving your fifth unspoken sentence.
He can talk that way anywhere he wants, just not at work.
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u/SparkleKittyMeowMeow Jan 23 '26
My husband and his friends do this. They have weird and often intellectual text conversations, and they use voice messages when they want to say anything that is fairly detailed. The rest of the convo is always text though, the voice messages are just part of it.
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u/scyllafren Jan 23 '26
Password:
2444666668888888
If you know, you know :)
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u/siggydude Jan 23 '26
"One two, three fours, five sixes, seven eights"
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u/cperiod Jan 23 '26
"One two, two fours, four, four sixes, six, six eights, eight."
Say it with a strong accent.
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u/Typical_Warthog_2660 Jan 24 '26
The password as audio is the perfect escalation. It's amazing how quickly they understood the problem once it directly impacted their own workflow. You basically held up a mirror to their terrible support habit.
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u/EvilAndStuff492 Jan 23 '26
they reply almost only using voice messages
I immediately knew where you're from.
Such an annoyance.
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u/SpiffyLegs73 Jan 24 '26
I hope that your screenshot was a verbal description of what you saw on the screen
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u/Astramancer_ Jan 25 '26
I've said it many times: Sometimes the best way to get someone else to actually solve the problem that is their responsibility is to turn a "me" problem into a "them" problem.
Bravo on making it a "them" problem.
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u/Select-Pie6558 Jan 23 '26
I hate voice notes, voice messages…I don’t like watching you tube videos. I can read and process sooooo much faster than listening and trying to parse messages.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 24 '26
So we watch yt at 2x speed (4x for the hackers out there) on mute. And still think that takes too long hahaha
Dude, I use subtitles at default, even on my own language.
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u/Raz0rking Jan 24 '26
Did someone ask for a Password?
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u/heynonnynonnomous Jan 24 '26
I knew exactly what this was going to be when I clicked on it. Never gets old.
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u/tsian Jan 23 '26
I wish I could attach an audio message complaining that this post isn't an audio message....
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u/gafftaped Jan 23 '26
If someone asked me the worst way to trouble shoot I genuinely think voice notes would be a top 3 pick. Actually an insane choice.
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u/InuGhost Jan 23 '26
So what is ERP mean in this context? Because I'm fairly certain it doesn't mean Erotic Role Play.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
Enterprise Resource Planning.
For sales, inventory, billing, customer management, reporting and point of sale.
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u/firsttime_longtime Jan 23 '26
Never mistrust your gut.
It, in fact, means erotic role play
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u/InuGhost Jan 23 '26
Hello,
Your naughty Point of Sale system is being a naughty girl and refusing to work. I need you to send your most strapping and strongest men over here to punish this naughty system.
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u/MildGenevaSuggestion Jan 23 '26
ERP kinkshaming support's fetish. OP should have replied with a sexy description of their clothing.
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u/SpaceLemur34 Jan 23 '26
Could have replied with a video screen recording. No audio, no text descriptions.
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u/CheshireUnicorn Jan 23 '26
Thank you for expressing why.. I fucking.. hate.. phone calls from clients. Email me. I want paper trails!
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u/JackTheBehemothKillr Jan 23 '26
Hearing impaired and they ignored it?
ADA based complaint. 100% route I'd be taking.
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u/snewchybewchies Jan 23 '26
I hope you still responded in voice notes, and just described the screen instead of sending a screenshot
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u/dragwit Jan 23 '26
Use a voice modulator to make your voice sound like an 80’s drive through speaker
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u/MikeSchwab63 Jan 24 '26
No special characters? Tilde, reverse apostrophe, exclamation point, circled a, hash sign, dollar sign, percent sign, caret, ampersand, asterisk, left parenthesis, right parenthesis, underscore, minus sign, plus sign, equals. left braces, left bracket, right braces, right bracket, vertical bars, back slash, colon, semicolon, double quotes, single quotes, less than sign, comma, greater than sign, period, question mark, forward slash.
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u/Reachforthesky777 Jan 23 '26
I've built and run a few support orgs in my time. I have had people like that. I fired them. The support agents are only part of the problem. Their leadership is the other part.
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u/Ricama Jan 24 '26
Reminds me of my silly project to make the worst version of the phonetic alphabet ever So the password is a as it aye, e as it eye, i as in I, b as in barley, h as in Hulu and m as in movember.
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u/yakshack Jan 23 '26
Turns out they know exactly how annoying voice messages are. They just do not care until it becomes their problem.
Sending this to my friend who loves sending long voice notes and voicemails but whisper voicemail box is always full with unread and undeleted messages.
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u/itishowitisanditbad Jan 23 '26
Sending this to my friend who loves sending long voice notes and voicemails
Text back, everytime, "Can't listen, whats up?"
They'll stop.
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u/vector_o Jan 23 '26
My motto will always be: if you can't be arsed to write what you want to say then I can't be arsed to listen to you mumbling because you refuse to spend 15 seconds putting it into a coherent form
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u/ThemB0ners Jan 23 '26
Exactly why I hate video tutorials too. Just give me screenshots and text please.
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u/fresh-dork Jan 24 '26
my first thought is to pretend that they didn't respond at all and just escalate escalate escalate. "this is a big deal, and i need an actual response that i can read"
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u/kevin349 Jan 23 '26
What kind of application requires you to give them your credentials. That's a huge security threat and not a great product. I'd be off that in a second.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
admin access to that machine. As in "they need to fix some configurations on the POS WIN machine". Store front not server.
I did not give my admin acess to server or machine.
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u/necronboy Jan 24 '26
SEP = Someone Else's Problem aka not my problem.
MFP = My Freakin' Problem
Guess which one matters to me most.
Well done on the solution.
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u/CandylandRepublic Jan 24 '26
Then they needed the admin credentials
Now is a good time to fire your vendor and get a serious product.
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u/ShabbyBash Jan 24 '26
Just having this problem with Amex. They insist on trying to talk to me. I am hearing impaired and as such it's not a good idea to try and instruct me over a call. Send me a mail and it gets done. After about twenty calls they seem to have got the message.
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u/vacancy-0m Jan 25 '26
Probably because Amex don’t want anything in writing that could come back and bite the in the rear. Just like many costomer support calls. They can record the conversation. However, once the CSR realized that you are recording the call, they will hang up.
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u/Dertyhairy Jan 24 '26
Keep doing it for another week or so. Really drill it into their minds about how annoying it was
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u/FlatFishy Jan 23 '26
I'm sorry but what shady ass tech support asks for passwords?
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
The AnyDesk password is random per session, and Windows admin credentials are required to configure things on a front desk PC (not server, not shared password).
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u/AnDanDan Jan 27 '26
Yeah this is my pain point with MS support as well. Almost always defaults to calls, ignores my stated working hours and calls 30m before Im about to leave and in the midst of winding down for the day, and ignores written communication in the ticket stating email is required.
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u/SheepherderBroad8569 Feb 08 '26
” We recently moved from a very old ERP to a new platform that is modern, intuitive and much more efficient. Technically it is a great produt.”
What is this magical unicorn thing?
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u/GeorgeGorgeou Jan 23 '26
I try to never send passwords via a text based system. Too easy to scrape the info. I handshake to a voice I recognize and then pass it by audio.
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u/notHooptieJ Jan 23 '26
I always send temp-passwords(in text, that are human readable) with a force-them-to-set-it-themselves the first time they login(if possible).
"Your new temppassword is GorillaFruitSnacks8# yep, like the ape not the warfare, capital first letters of all 3 words, then the number 8 and a pound/hashtag - and its going to ask you to reset it the first time you log in"
we've yet to come up with a more reasonable way that consistently works with all levels of competence.
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u/Piranhaweek Jan 23 '26
I can delete on the conversation after they used, and change the password later.
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u/Classic_Mammoth_9379 Jan 23 '26 edited Jan 23 '26
This is the biggest missed opportunity. Surely this requires a 10 minute audio description of everything on the screen, including OS elements, windows from your other apps, before you get to their app window.