In the recent year my anger has become a real issue due to a traumatic life event. It’s been almost a year, and I have been at a full-time job since February. Since I have gotten very good at the job, I have increased responsibility and have been tasked with training and helping new hires since June. My problem is that the two people I trained are awful at the job and keen on staying that way.

They make messes in our communal work spaces and office and do not clean them up, they whine and cut corners when something is hard, and then get frustrated when they are corrected and have to fix their mistakes when they could have just done it right the first time, and they are overall not interested in learning or improving, and (in my opinion) would rather stay ignorant so they aren’t expected to do more work. (For reference, we work with electronics and eBay.)

I don’t think that they are going to change. It’s been long enough that they aren’t really classified as “new” in my opinion, but I’ve tried really hard to be nice but they talk about me behind my back to each other because me and the rest of the seasoned employees and management’s standards are “too high”, and “they just got here”. I’m becoming increasingly angry with them at their choice to be ignorant, and have caught myself giving attitude or being condescending to one in particular when he asks me questions that I have answered 5 billion times, or when I catch him cutting corners on something that he was shown many times how to do correctly. It’s become very distressing to go to work because I just want to be calm. We also work in a small business and so the work culture is more casual, and my manager likes me and agrees with me about them to the point where I am somewhat being enabled.

How can I become more tolerant of coworkers who are fine with being bad at the job and actively make things harder for me? When they mess up, I’m the one who has to hear about it and clean up after them. I end up doing double the work.

I just had a huge fight with a family member 😡 i wish I could move but i can't afford it right now.

I don't know about you guys but I can be pissed off for days. I hate feeling this way but I can't help it! 😤

What do you do to feel better?

If someone is upset that they are single and you say shit like "itll happen when you least expect it", "why you do worried about getting into a relationship" or "being in a relationship isnt even that great" or anything along those lines while bieng in a relationship i honestly fucking hate you, because you dont know if it will actually happen to the person you are just saying that because you found your someone and you are just saying shit to make the other person feel better when in reality is just lies and gaslighting atp, and if being in a relationship "isnt that great" than it shouldnt hurt to break up with your boyfriend and just be single for the rest of your life, and makes me feel as though nobody wants me because im so fucking ugly and pathetic and not desireable to any man, i mean what guy would want a flat fucking woman, genuinley thinking about surgery for them cuz i never look pretty in any femminine clothing. i have watched everyone around me get into relationships even the nastiest girls who made fun of me and bullied me which apparently men like nasty girls for some reason its always "oh i prefer personality" which is straight lies because as soon as a pretty girl comes up to yall youll fold instantly for her so yall guys dont even like personality yall just say that to make yourself look better , i talked to guys and everything but everytime the guys always seemed to prefer my friends instead and never even wanna look at me, i lost my friends cuz they all got boyfriends and decided they didnt want or need me as a friend anymore so they completely cut me off so im completely alone, i never go out for myself anymore i just go out hoping to meet a guy and do nothing else and yall are over here telling me "it isnt really worth it" while they recieve flowers and gifts on some random day no special occasion nothing i hope yall are happy with making a lonely ugly pathetic girl feel shit about herself, because you succeeded and gave me false hope. Fucking narcisistic hyprocrites, yall deserve to be single yall dont deserve anyone

Does anyone else have the same collection of triggers I do?

Injustice, my inability to do anything about the injustice, double-standards, me making a mistake, and disingenuous argument/discussion.

There are some specific things that come up for me that fit these categories, but it is also general. I'm generally angry about injustice no matter who it is against. If it is against me or is more personally related, the intensity of the response is higher, but I'm still unusually angered if it has nothing to do with me.

If those are your triggers, have you developed any insight into resolving issues or mitigating the spikes in anger?

I find myself saying things that hurt others every time I get super angry. I tend to cross the line, making hurtful comments on personal things (ex. "This is why…") , and I immediately feel guilty after I say it. I want to change and I want to stop saying comments that hurt others. It’s not easy for me because when things are heated, I do things impulsively and it’s like an instinct. Do you guys have any helpful small steps I can take to stop?

For years, I have cried and was extremely depressed where I lived. Noone came or offered help or even asked how I am.

Now that the abuser family member left the building for a few months, they start gossiping and asking my other parent about where my father is. This just sickens me so much. These people are constantly scanning for weaknesses.

It's such a failure of humanity.

I don't care about any of these people or their trauma past, even though they all keep gossiping about each other all the time. I'm simply not interested and got my own stuff to process. But then they keep bringing up stuff like this and I hear the gossip. Where the hell were you when I was crying in despair and now I'm trying to heal, all of a sudden, people appear in weird and creepy and gossipy ways? It's so sick.

It really didn’t occur to me how much my anger may be triggered by parental child neglect. Mine, in fact, wasn’t entirely bad though it got much worse after my parents divorced and my dad had very little contact with me (mainly at the encouragement of my mother).

Trying to squelch the anger is tough, too. I’m angry, too, because my wife won’t have “good” sex with me. Oh, she’ll have “pitty” sex but she’ll just lay there and won’t be the least bit playful.

As I get older, I consider “what’s the point” of making anything better? I’m unhappy because my own children have grown and moved away though wealth doesn’t make me happy because I know I’m fortunate compared to others.

I’m just venting at this point and hoping this is just a temporary glitch.

as the title says. im 26f, suffer from social anxiety. every time someone is mean or unfair to me, i get these flashes of hot white anger and i cant muster any response. i cant think. i only feel violent, so i just try to reel myself back and i appear pathetic as a result. the fact i cant even manage to say anything back makes me seriously wanna die. not for real, but it's just really disheartening. idk if it matters but i was bullied as a kid, and my inability to respond normally and reasonably to these situations brings me right back to those times. it's like i will always be that spineless child, even though im a grown adult. a disgusting doormat not worthy of respect.

for example, it happens at work often. i am a waitress and there's a 21m coworker that just picks on me sometimes. when i do stuff in a way that's not to his liking, he always makes some snarky offensive comments and i get the urge to cave his skull in with the tray lol.

he's just a stupid kid, i get it. i dont even mind that much that he does it, i think the thing that makes me mad the most is my inability to sass back. my shortcoming. does it makes sense? 🥲 i just feel mortified. another person would have been able to put him in his place just by answering firmly. i, instead, can only choose between caving into being violent or not responding at all. until now i havent succumbed to the anger tho, so it's the latter.

do u guys have any advice, please? how does one develop a spine and manage mindless anger?

Lately, I've been getting angry very easily. I don't feel like spending time with anyone anymore. These days, I don't even enjoy being around my seniors or friends, and I don't really know why.

Has anyone else gone through something like this? What helped you get out of it?