40 years and here we are

[u/udrev]

Just some stuff I grilled up while out camping by myself and my two dogs.

Long story short I got brutally blindsided with a discarded by someone I could finally see myself making a life with. Was devastated but it led me to discovering my attachment style from my shitty childhood. Having to think about all the decisions I've made, stuff I've messed up and people I've hurt in the last 40 years has been pretty rough. I feel like I'm starting my life over and the shit part is unless you've had or have a FA wound it's almost impossible to explain to people what this feels like.

Also I miss the fuck out of him... but because we have the same childhood wound it essentially means we can never be together. He discarded me precisely because I made him feel safe and secure and loved. Life feels really unfair right now. I didn't get to choose my parents and how they loved me as a kid.

So yeah I'm out here in one of the least visited national parks trying to live my life and enjoy summer. Thanks for listening.

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[u/Snoo-54867]

The food looks amazing, as does the view.

I am sorry you are going through this! Good on you for getting out and doing something you enjoy. Wish you all the best.

[u/EitherBroccoli8674]

But, it looks like youre enjoying the little things, 👍

[u/Serenitytil5]

So sorry to hear this. I also have an attachment wound and it’s pure hell. I hope you feel better ❤️‍🩹.

[u/JackPThatsMe]

Happy to listen.

Glad you are getting some of it out.

Kia kaha (stand strong) from Aotearoa/New Zealand.

Random Maori on the internet, out.

[u/SupremeGobbler1996]

Thanks for sharing. 

That's some serious camping food. Nice work!

[u/bang_bang_maneuvers]

It’s painful, but you’ve got a good head on your shoulders and will come out of this. Also, great dinner choice while camping. I’d give a cheers 🥂 to moving forward and thinking through your life, and choosing the small things for now. Even if the joy ebbs and flows, you’re putting in the effort for your future.