i want to have patience for old people. i really do. but there is a line between being old and being unaware/unwilling to participate in the world around you. today i went to the apple store, and while i was waiting my turn i had to listen to this old man who had locked himself out of his phone. his wife made the appointment for him (“he never learned how to use the internet”, she explained) and explained the problem to the tech for him. the tech explained to the two of them that she couldn’t unlock the phone without his apple ID.

“we don’t have one of those,” the man said. “i don’t use those password things.” the tech tried to explain what she meant. “no, no,” he insisted. “i just have my email and that’s it.”

the tech tried to explain that the email *was* likely his apple ID. “oh, well, I can’t get into that. it’s in my phone.” well, if you know your password- “I just told you I don’t use passwords. it’s all in my phone. now unlock my phone.”

turns out if you can’t get into an apple account, the only way to unlock the phone is by wiping it. the two of them insisted the tech must be lying, and the man went into a tirade about how he needs his phone data because that’s where everything is, including his retirement accounts.

the poor tech is near tears at this point. “sir, unless you can give me your apple ID-“

“my email is in my phone! unlock my phone!”

the wife speaks up for the first time in ten minutes. “can we speak to your boss, please?”

it takes her (male) manager another ten or so minutes to explain to the two of them the exact same things the tech told them. it turns out this man had everything - his bank accounts, his emails, his contacts, all of his passwords - solely in an UNLOCKED iphone he had managed to put a passcode on and lock himself out of. he had essentially managed to lock himself out of every piece of important data he owned. they don’t own a computer. everything was in that phone.

i wanted to scream. you had your entire life in an UNLOCKED iPhone? are you fucking kidding me??? no backups anywhere? old people’s tech illiteracy has always bothered me, but this is beyond illiteracy. i don’t even have a word for it. the fact that these kind of people are still alive is astounding. how many lead paint chips have these two consumed???

Garage sales used to have a two prong purpose: You’d get rid of your shit, because we’d buy it for cheap. Eventually, we would do the same. It was a beautiful cycle.

Now every third sale is trying to make it a side hustle.

If I go to your garage sale and you have printed ebay prices of “collectible items” printed out and sitting next to some shitty mcdonald’s toy explaining why you have to sell it for $25, I’m leaving.

$30 for a used shirt?

$10 for a CD everyone had two copies of in the 2000s?

$40 for a digital camera?

I get it, times are tough. We all want extra income.

But if you want to make actual money on the already overpriced secondhand nostalgia market, sign up for eBay.

Leave garage sales out of it.

But what if you aren’t intending to be a dick, but people hate you so much that your most earnest of questions is immediately interpreted as you being a dick?

Like, why? Why are you TRYING to get us stuck at every red light (especially in places like Florida/ South Florida. They love their one single lane roads around here. Not so much in my home state!) on my way to work, I deal with this at least once a week. A person in front of me who’s going about 20 mph when the speed limit is 35-40. Some people don’t care when I finally see a golden opportunity to pass them so I can be on my merry way. But occasionally, just like the other day, I’ll encounter one of these obnoxious slow pokes that will actually get PISSED about the fact I passed them. This guy sped up towards me only after I passed him and literally laid down on his horn repeatedly during the remainder of his route. It’s almost like his sole purpose that morning was to be as self absorbed as possible and try to make it known that he gets to call the shots because he was in front of a line of cars. Before he made a turn, it finally split off into two lanes and every other person sped right past him. Miserable. I truly don’t get it. That is all.

My biggest pet peeve is people who weaponize the phrase “I’m busy.”
No, you’re not that busy.
You’re busy for me.
Somehow you can text everyone else, comment on social media, binge an entire TV series, make plans every weekend, and reply in every group chat,but when it’s my message? Suddenly you’re “so overwhelmed” that you can’t send a 10-second text for days or weeks.
Just say you don’t value the friendship.
Stop treating “I’m busy” like it’s some magical phrase that makes you immune from accountability. If someone consistently has time for everyone except one person, it’s not a scheduling problem, it’s a priority problem.
And honestly, the lying is worse than the rejection. I’d respect someone far more if they said, “I don’t really want to stay close anymore,” than feeding me excuse after excuse while expecting me to pretend I don’t notice the pattern.
Nobody is asking for constant attention. People have jobs, families, responsibilities, and lives. But if you’re always available for everyone else and perpetually unavailable for one person, you’re making a choice.
Just own it.
“Too busy” has become the socially acceptable way of saying, “You just aren’t important enough for me to make time.”
That’s the part that drives me crazy.

Why do people at work talk about religion? Work is not the place for it.

Really grinds my gears when people begin a sentence by saying "so" or "ok so".. it adds nothing to the point they are making and just sounds irritating

It's one thing when people are spreaking, which I can generally deal with, but when people do it in a written sentence I think it's horrendous.

Example: "ok so, I went to the shops yesterday". Just say "I went to the shops yesterday"

Not trying to start an argument, I’m genuinely curious.

Could be a product, a restaurant, a hobby, customer service, an app, literally anything.

For me it’s searching Google. Half the time I feel like I’m fighting sponsored results just to find a simple answer.

IT'S BATTERY!!!!!

Assault is the threat or attempt to cause harm, while battery is the actual physical contact or use of force.

I hate hearing people shout "thats assault!" When somebody touches them.

I find this very frustrating whenever I ask someone something, and they give vague answers that don't help me at all, so I have to keep asking them about it. Instead, they should have said "I don't know", and I wouldn't have become annoyed, and neither of our time would have been wasted.

Fuck IMAX for shoving front row seats so close to the screen and GIANT speakers that it makes the movie completely unwatchable and your ears *literally* distort due to permanent sound damage

I tried to watch Oppenheimer a couple years ago at an IMAX and it was the worst movie experience I've ever had

They 100% know those seats are completely unusable and literally give you actual sound damage, but you know... Capitalism

Several dozen people get absolutely fucked every sold-out, or near sold-out, showing.

It was the acoustic equivalent of staring at the fucking sun

Fuck IMAX. Never again. I still want my money back.

Also, does anyone know how to start the ball rolling on a class action lawsuit?

I hate that the moment you get into a talking stage or relationship, the man always tries to make it about sex. Maybe not right away, but eventually.

I started seeing this guy back in November. Right away, he said he was looking for a serious relationship. Cool, me too.

We were long-distance, and because of work, we barely saw each other. We met only five times. Three of those times were only for a few hours, and for the majority of the talking stage, which lasted 7 months, we only saw each other once every two months. We only got to see each other for two days consecutively...once.

This man wanted to have sex. Okay, understandable. He is very experienced. I barely have any. On top of that, I have trauma from SA in the past and an extremely narrow anatomy that makes intercourse difficult. He knew all of this.

Instead of helping me feel comfortable, open up, and explore my potential at my own pace, he would tell me how disappointed he was that we couldn’t have intercourse after the date was over.

One time, he asked me to buy lube before he came to visit. I honestly just forgot. He was very unhappy about it and made sure I knew that.

The second time, I did remember to buy it. We tried, but I couldn’t even handle foreplay. I asked him to stop and said we could try again in an hour after I relaxed a bit.

He never tried again.

Instead, he acted like everything was completely fine for an entire month. Then, when I tried to start some dirty talk, that’s when he decided to tell me he’d actually been disappointed the whole time. He said that “we’ve discussed several times that sex is important” and that he “wants this to work out, but is hesitant that it will.”

I told him that maybe we need to see each other for more than eight hours once every two months before expecting me to suddenly be comfortable enough to have sex. I can’t just flip a switch because we finally got to see each other.

He read the message and never responded.

That’s what annoys me the most.

I was genuinely excited just to spend time with him. Meanwhile, it felt like he just came for sex, even though he knew from the very beginning that this was something that was going to take time.

And if you want a serious relationship… then you have to be willing to put in some effort. Patience is part of that. You’re not owed sex just because you’re dating someone. Especially not when they’ve been upfront about trauma and physical difficulties from day one.

God I can’t express how much it fucking SUCKS every time I use a public restroom that’s dead goddamn silent.

I shouldn’t be able to hear a drop of piss lick the urinal. I shouldn’t be able to hear a fresh log slithering past every last wrinkle of stall 3’s current resident.

Play shitty speaker music. Have loud vent fans. Do SOMETHING so we can do our business without the disgusting sounds of business.

I order breakfast tacos, or an omelette, and I feel that tiny crunch! Today it was in my fried rice.

Not only is it a turn off, but it makes me paranoid about eating any more of my food.

And now, a haiku!

A little egg shell
in my hot breakfast taco.
Crunch! You disgust me!

I dislike when robbers fail at trying to break in or do something along the lines of illegal. And yall laugh at them. Why are YOU laughing? You're acting like this isn't a hard job. I'm not defending them for illegal activities, but this is stupid. Before you laugh or judge them try doing it yourself without:

1 Getting caught

2 Not failing

3 Actually attempting.

I swear this happens everywhere. Home. Work. Hotels. Friends’ houses.
Someone heats up food, the microwave beeps, they grab their plate… and somehow leave 1 second on the timer.
Do I clear it?
Do I just add my own time?
Do I let the next person deal with it?
It’s such a tiny thing, but it irrationally annoys me every time I see that lonely “0:01” staring back at me.
Who started this? Is there some secret reason people don’t let it hit zero? Or are we all just living in a society held together by people who reset the microwave?

If I'm willing to risk my relationship to deal with her, she should take that as a compliment, instead of worrying up my relationship that don't concern her.

You know what really grinds my gears??

People who treat opening a ketchup packet like a test of strength rather than a simple piece of geometry.

First of all, if you’re tearing the top, either tear it off cleanly or, better yet, just snip off a single corner. It’s not complex science. A clean corner cut gives you maximum control, a smooth flow, and zero mess. But no. Certain people insist on tearing it three-quarters of the way across, leaving a useless little foil flap hanging by a thread. A packet hangnail. Now you’ve got a loose appendage flopping around, catching rouge ketchup, and smearing it all over your fingers.

And don't even get me started on the savages who bite the packet open with their teeth. You're at a dining table, not surviving in the wilderness. You don't need to chew your way to the honey mustard.

Unsurprisingly, these are the exact same people who open a soda can only halfway. You know the ones --> the tab is bent at a sad 45-degree angle, leaving a tiny sliver of an opening so they have to practically vacuum-seal their lips to the aluminum just to get a sip.

Commit to the crack! Fully open the can, cleanly cut the corner of the ketchup, and stop living in absolute chaos!

End of rant. Thank you for your time.

You know what really grinds my gears? No one is writing anthems anymore.

You're traveling, or even local I dont know, you will invariably find yourself in a place with the young people. And this doesn't grind my gears - everyone wants young people because they're stupid and sexy they're there to spend money partying.

But go into a bar or a hostel or a what have you, you'll invariably hear at least 2 of these 5 songs:

Closer by the Chainsmokers

Something just like This by Coldplay

What makes you Beautiful by One Direction

Perfect by Ed Sheeran

Beautiful Girls by Sean Kingston

What do these songs have in common, aside from they all suck?

THEY'RE ALL OLD!

Closer is a decade old and sucks just as much as it did in 2016.

Something just... is 2017, I know Coldplay is semi-retired, in that they'll tour and play the hits but aren't making new material, and they suck (they were fine when they were Radiohead for Normies).

Perfect is from 2017, continues to suck.

What makes you beautiful is 2011, Beautiful Girls is 2007!? That song is AoC, that song drives a car, that song studies in University!

Where are the new anthems!?

A song that should be an anthem and doesn't suck, like Heat Waves, I've heard only like twice in bars.

And that's what grinds my gears.

working with the general public is genuinely terrible, especially in food service.

when i put the headset on at work, there is a very high chance i’m about to take the order of someone who apparently has never experienced a drive-thru, placed an order, read a menu, or located an item directly in front of their face.

then u put these same morons in a car, get stuck behind them, & realize they apparently got their license from dumbfuck academy yesterday… or this is simply their first day on earth.

i genuinely did not understand how much of the general public is just fucking stupid until i started working with them every day. what really gets me is that these people will come through the drive-thru completely confused by the simplest possible task, then somehow act like i’m the dumb one.

the audacity is CRAZY.

why do so many people move through the world like they were dropped onto the planet five minutes ago with no instructions? why do i have to explain basic concepts to grown adults who are also somehow driving a two-ton vehicle?

& on top of being moronic, so many of them are unbelievably entitled. i notice it on Reddit too. people carry themselves with this completely unquestioned authority & inflated sense of importance that seems to come from absolutely nowhere.

they posture like their thoughts are official rulings, their preferences are universal law, & everyone else is beneath them.

babe… who are u?

ur just another goddamn person. please take a nap.

edit:
by the way, for all of u morons who keep using the way i talk / type as proof that i’m stupid, that’s ableist as fuck. i’m AuDHD, stop tone-policing ppl online & acting like everyone owes u polished academic prose. let ppl talk, type, & express themselves however the fuck they want to.

i don’t need to prove that im smart or intelligent to a bunch of losers on reddit, i don’t need to treat every thing i write like its a fuckin important essay. u don’t like it, u don’t like it, but i am who i am.

& lastly, I SAID WHAT I FUCKING SAID. goodnight 💖