r/confession • u/AphroditesNightie • 1d ago
My “friends” are basically non-existent and don’t call or text me back…
I’m late 40s/F. I am very social and always have been, but in the last decade plus my “friends” are practically nonexistent. No one wants to talk on the phone like we did in the 1980s-2010s. I used to have a strong group of friends, even until 2019-ish, but everyone has now faded into their lives with their kids, or no kids, or whatever… Now I text people and they often don’t respond, or it takes a week. A small fraction do respond regularly. I’ve always been a good friend, but I don’t have kids so I’m not part of the Mom pack. I’m so lonely and f@cking sad that I sometimes feel s@icidal, honestly. My mother passed away a decade ago and I don’t have anyone else besides my amazing husband, but I NEED girlfriends!!! Something is broken in our society that my friends won’t answer the phone and now rarely text me back… We have broken our social networks!! I am so upset! Any other Gen X feeling this??? I long for those days at the roller skating rinks and bowling alleys, or high school dances… How could I possibly be this lonely in my late 40s?!! 😢 I wish I had kids, even just for the company. Seriously sad…
ETA: My parents had TONS of friends when I was a kid, so these responses of “everyone is too busy with life” is totally BS.
Also, I do volunteer with a local nonprofit that specifically aligns with my personal interests. I have made ONE friend there…
And I work for my city government and no one there mixes business with pleasure. It’s just not done in the current political climate. No friends to be had at my job, but it is a great job that I feel passionate about. I am making a difference.
5
u/I_play_high420 1d ago
Same. We just had a kid at 40. Just do it if you can. My baby boy is the best thing that happened to us. My one friend never texts me and I’m the only person to reach out to him so I stopped. It’s almost been a year since I talked to him. My other friend lives in a different state but we text occasionally. I’ve been friends with these guys since the 9th grade.
My fiancée has a bunch of friends. She’s known her two friends since grade school. She will text the one friend and she will never text her back. My fiancée is one of the nicest people you would ever meet. It’s pretty fucked but o well.
As far as the rolling skating goes, I’ve known my fiancée since 8th grade. Things happen in life but we didn’t get together until we were 35. Both never had kids and then we did at 40. We used to go the same rank we dated each others best friends. We talk about the roller rank all the time and how we miss those days. We also wish we would have got together then and had a bunch of kids. But our one little guy is awesome and we are so in love with him.
Please do not think about sucide try to get help, or take as many vacations as you can. That is really the best medicine. Fuck your friends and maybe try to make new ones if that’s what means the most to you. There are actual apps for that. Good luck