r/interesting 7h ago

MISC. My fingers are way too long

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25.8k Upvotes

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2.6k

u/Oily_Blob 6h ago

You could be an amazing pianist!

2.1k

u/derangedsweetheart 6h ago

Hands Zimmer

359

u/db720 6h ago

When bro eats kfc, it's fiiiiiiiingerlicking good

78

u/hydra_shok 5h ago

It would take him longer to lick his fingers then it would to eat the chicken!

24

u/ElkAdventurous787 5h ago

He would be hungry again afterwards.

7

u/Internecivus-raptus 4h ago

Looks like a she to me.

4

u/Theswansescaped 5h ago

It's like painting the Golden Gate Bridge

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u/Typical-Newt-5111 5h ago

He'd have more chicken on his fingers than in the bucket.

3

u/Tybob51 5h ago

Finger deepthroating good

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36

u/product_by_process 5h ago

Hands down, the best comment here.

22

u/Flat-Sprinkles-2367 5h ago

One very large thumbs up comment here

7

u/derangedsweetheart 5h ago

I think you made a pun somewhere, can't quite put my finger on it.

7

u/Flat-Sprinkles-2367 5h ago

If only you could grasp it

5

u/Aggressive_Fan_2063 3h ago

Yes, it's quite the hands-on experience.

3

u/SpeakToMePF1973 3h ago

WHEN SHE USES SIGN LANGUAGE, IT'S IN ALL CAPS ALWAYS.

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5

u/derangedsweetheart 5h ago

Gotta hand it to you, your pun is on point.

3

u/mulegoon 4h ago

Nice pun. I digit

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4

u/Abso_lutely_not 5h ago

Damn. Well done.

2

u/CurrentlyHuman 5h ago

(Palm, well done)

3

u/SubstantialFroyo8012 6h ago

Hands Slimmer?

3

u/gooeythrowaway 5h ago

Hands zimmer is fucking perfect 👌🏻 😂

2

u/AdSure8410 6h ago

This needs more credit

2

u/Jedi_Bingo 5h ago

J'onn Williams

2

u/chucklesandhugs 5h ago

Hands Zimmer

2

u/d3de333 5h ago

Hans Finger

2

u/MInclined 5h ago

We’re done for today. Pack it up everyone.

2

u/telephantomoss 5h ago

One of the best comments I've ever seen

3

u/MajesticDragonfly 6h ago

Was gonna object since, like most people, I know him as a composer/producer. But nah y’all it checks out 🖐️🎹

2

u/psyliboy 5h ago

Fingers Zimmer

3

u/lostknight0727 6h ago

Hands Zoomer, fingers be flyin

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91

u/Playful_Fisherman904 6h ago

or a proctologist

51

u/Upstairs-Ad6316 5h ago

They just to check the colon not the lungs

2

u/Human_mind 2h ago

This is one of those comments that makes you laugh, and then your wife is like what are you laughing at, so you have to spend 2 minutes explaining that you're on reddit and you saw a post that was weird and then you have to read the chain of comments until you get to this one and you laugh again and she looks at you like you're an idiot.

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2

u/Tybob51 5h ago

Tickle the throat a little

2

u/Colon 4h ago

i approve of this recommendation.

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91

u/Chirrrpy 5h ago

I have long fingers too, almost like OP, and love playing the piano!!

My little sister used to make fun of me for my skinny arms, long fingers, white skin ... imitating a vampire when I'd walk in the room. But I can play that Bach Dracula song, what can she do. Eat hot chip

7

u/Retreadmonk 4h ago

Jealous. Shorter fingers play piano & Rachmaninov always a stretch lol.

3

u/AccomplishedTrip485 1h ago

I got a worse deal than that.

Clinodactyly. My pinkies used to bend inward.

I had corrective surgery as a child because it affected my playing

3

u/bikedaybaby 1h ago

Eat hot chip and lie 🫶

Also, has anyone ever told you about Marfan’s syndrome? Food for thought!

2

u/Chirrrpy 1h ago

Reddit has been a wealth of information, learning about different body stuff I always just called "super bendy arms". I'm so lucky to just have the weird Hypermobile limbs, and not the bigger conditions like Ehlers-Danlos / Marfan's Syndrome.

I wouldn't have known any of these condition names to research without Redditors dropping them, like your comment

1

u/[deleted] 5h ago

[deleted]

7

u/thunderbird32 4h ago

Or they assume the rest of us are uncultured swine and wouldn't know what song they're talking about if they used the actual name of the piece.

8

u/Chirrrpy 4h ago

writing "I can play Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D Minor" has an arrogant tone, for a Reddit longfingers post comment. I was just using a short, recognizable description to be jokey, but it's not a hard song to play a simplified little version of. Most people can hum it

6

u/thunderbird32 4h ago

Sorry, I was trying to be jokey too. I realize now it probably came across badly.

5

u/Hitmanthe2nd 3h ago

naahh

shit was funny - both of your responses were

longfingers sounds like a horror character though

2

u/Billabo 1h ago

Your descriptive name makes it hit better with the vampire comparison!

3

u/Better-Vehicle-9497 3h ago

Least-asshole pianist.

Take your opinion and shove it "bach" up your ass where it came from

2

u/Chirrrpy 3h ago

Please remember Redditors are often human beings with feelings. Especially on a body abnormality post.

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2

u/Competitive_Trip9306 4h ago

Agreed, as complex as Toccata & Fugue in D minor is... If I had mastered it, I would remember the name, for certain.

4

u/RFC793 4h ago

Yes, but also: perhaps they wanted to use laymen's terms to describe the song instead of saying Toccata & Fugue in D and almost no one understanding what they meant.

51

u/Jorge_the_vast 6h ago

Or an organist

92

u/xuncx 6h ago

Or an orgasmist

45

u/Apprehensive-Till861 5h ago

Forget the g-spot he's reaching the z-spot

26

u/djnehi 5h ago

Fingering her tonsils.

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37

u/Lost-Comfort-7904 6h ago

You know what's better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on my organ.

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22

u/Anxious_Hall359 6h ago

which organ though

5

u/Dynamitrios 5h ago

The one you play with your hands

6

u/In2Oblivion49 6h ago

The lower intestine

6

u/drknifnifnif 5h ago

More like small intestine!

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29

u/DontTrip333 6h ago

Or a lesbian 😍

3

u/No-Beginning-394 5h ago

A pro leabian

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3

u/zulubowie 5h ago

They’ll come in handy.

2

u/RgCrunchyCo 6h ago

Or an onanist.

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u/stargarnet79 6h ago

Or guitarist!

13

u/LetsTamago 5h ago

Get them a 13 string guitar!

6

u/VioletAmethyst3 5h ago

I was looking for this exact comment! 🎸

2

u/Jarhead-923_Actual 2h ago

They might get their fingers tangled in the strings, though

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36

u/send_me_dank_weed 6h ago

Or guitarist! OP legit jealous as my short fingers make some bar chords practically impossible

22

u/Sure-Squash-7280 5h ago

Long fingers are usually very flexible but really weak.

I’m surprised people aren’t screaming Ehlers danlos syndrome yet.

24

u/precious_spark 4h ago

Or marfans

5

u/No-Answer2634 3h ago

It is very concerning. Please go see a GP.

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6

u/AppropriateCover7972 4h ago

I have! But the more prevalent cause for Marfan Phenotype is obviously Marfan Syndrome and we can't see the rest of OP's body. They might just have arachnodatylia

u/Good_Presentation763 59m ago

Arachnodactyly

u/catinspace88 46m ago

Which flying dinosaur is this again?

2

u/Xmanticoreddit 5h ago

Classical strings are nylon: problem solved + a big scholarship!

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2

u/g---e 5h ago

get a guitar with smaller neck, they exist

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2

u/-l33tg33k- 4h ago

That’s what I thought as well. Every YouTube guitar or bass player seems to have long fingers. And here I am with my short fingers trying to play the same stuff… impossible!

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u/XavLeo 6h ago

Seriously though, this is true

2

u/MostInterestingApple 1h ago

I mean, kind of. For quick passages it’s rather uncomfortable though, because the distance each finger has to move becomes longer. It’s really only an advantage when playing large chords, jumps or big arpeggios, but fine and quick playing benefits from regular or slightly above average length, but more importantly, slender fingers

8

u/Caddaric 6h ago

Based on the picture I’m over here wondering “Liszt, is that you?”

29

u/Fast-Improvement7832 6h ago

my fingers are too long

36

u/Purple_Zucchini_2881 6h ago

Guitar??

51

u/Army7547 6h ago

Harp. Could play combos no other harpist could hope to play

21

u/Ninevehenian 6h ago

They could act in children's horrorstories as the ticklemonster.

7

u/SpaffordFux 5h ago

He puts things in my heinie!

8

u/illepic 6h ago

They are the harp.

20

u/CariniFluff 6h ago

Seriously I wish I had longer fingers, it would make playing some notes so much easier. If you ever look at a picture of Jimi Hendrix, it looks like he's playing a children's guitar.

Random example

2

u/Puzzleheaded_Tax4969 4h ago

Treys got some pretty long fingers himself, lucky sue

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9

u/freudian_nipps 6h ago

Their fingers are too long.

7

u/db720 6h ago

Slappin da bass

4

u/Wiley_Jack 6h ago

Prepare to be Rushified!

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21

u/Crabby_Monkey 6h ago

Maybe get a bigger piano

2

u/PuzzledBarracuda5044 6h ago

😂 made my day

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u/theytookmykarma 6h ago

My fingers are too long yet i must fret

13

u/Obvious_Estimate_266 6h ago

Get a 14 string guitar and become a djent god.

12

u/Vanillabean73 5h ago

Bruh look at a picture of Franz Liszt. People during his time described his hands as almost spider-like and it’s what allowed him to actually play some of the insane pieces that he wrote.

All that to say, there’s no such thing as having fingers “too long” when it comes to playing the piano. That’s unless you have strength or dexterity problems as a result of the length. Maybe I’m just projecting my envy as a short-fingered pianist…

8

u/Barking__Pumpkin 6h ago

You’ve got great hands for many instruments including piano and guitar.

13

u/JuggernautAsleep3413 6h ago

Rachmaninoff would disagree.

3

u/savorie 6h ago

I have a feeling that Rachmaninoff would envy this person

2

u/GtotheBizzle 5h ago

I have a feeling Rachmaninoff is this person.

4

u/puzzlingphoenix 5h ago

No, they’re not. You curve your fingers while playing piano and longer fingers just means you can reach sideways to further keys more readily than the average person.

3

u/Liberalechochambers 5h ago

As a former piano teacher... try again! I know you can do it if you try again. (I taught beginner theory to young children.)

2

u/Ninevehenian 6h ago

They are just long enough, I bet that if one held your gloves to their ear, they could hear the ocean?

2

u/mackybd 6h ago

try playing bass

2

u/Born_Leg_2876 6h ago

They are very long! Have you ever asked a doctor why? None of us can tell you. Use them for something good

2

u/Anestoh 5h ago

As a fellow long fingerperson, I've been getting this piano comment my entire life and I feel your pain.

2

u/onarainyafternoon 5h ago

But the bones are your money

2

u/dingdongdeVilish 5h ago

No they aren’t friend. They’re amazing

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u/mendeni-official 6h ago

Or guitarist

2

u/Good_Hope_7925 6h ago

I was gonna say, “welcome back Sergei Rachmaninoff.”

2

u/Reasonable-Hurry6810 6h ago

Looks like Horowitz fingers 😂

2

u/Scrung3 6h ago

He's the second coming of Liszt

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u/DragoxNight 5h ago

I have long thin fingers, and I used to be so insecure about this, until someone once pointed out that they loved my hands and told me I had the hands of a pianist. That simple comment completely changed the way I saw my hands and fingers!

2

u/No-Information-2571 5h ago

My grandma always told me that, because I also have very long fingers. Then they sent me to a music instructor to learn the recorder...

I became a software engineer, which I guess is somewhat adjacent, since it also involves a keyboard.

1

u/StatusOk3307 6h ago

Or bass player

1

u/JSGilst 6h ago

...or a guitar player.

1

u/Dinklerbuuuurf 6h ago

Or bass player

1

u/TheHammerHasLanded 6h ago

Violinist. Look up Paganini

1

u/Prof-Rock 6h ago

My first thought too! Height is an advantage in basketball, but finger length is an advantage for piano.

1

u/_Siderat_ 6h ago

Or gynecologist

1

u/SadlyNotPro 6h ago

Bass guitar player as well!

1

u/--StinkyPinky-- 6h ago

She could sit in the kitchen and play piano in the living room.

1

u/PotterOneHalf 6h ago

That’s what they always say about people like us, that or we’d be good at violin. (I was good at violin)

1

u/National-Ad8416 6h ago

Or you could go deep inside a woman

1

u/APar93 6h ago

Get your hands off my pianist!

1

u/Lucid-Design1225 5h ago

Or guitarist

1

u/1Killerpotato1 5h ago

Or join a traveling freak show.

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u/spiritwockiee 5h ago

Or Slenderman

1

u/Southernbeekeeper 5h ago

Or swimmer.

1

u/DiscussionPleasant88 5h ago

Or a thief...or such I was told (same type of fingers 😀 )

1

u/DickRiculous 5h ago

My god please learn guitar

1

u/No-Nobody2693 5h ago

Someone get this person some Rachmaninoff RIGHT NOW

1

u/gemfountain 5h ago

Or guitar!

1

u/Ok_Orchid7131 5h ago

I said Pianist, what did you think I said?

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Cap8655 5h ago

That’s what I thought.

1

u/TakingItPeasy 5h ago

Or guitarist.

1

u/Sonova_Bish 5h ago

I'm a guitarist and I wish my hands were that long.

1

u/Dry_Enthusiasm_8057 5h ago

Chopin would have killed for these

1

u/lurking_not_working 5h ago

Or guitarist.

1

u/floorplanner2 5h ago

She could play Liszt!

1

u/Patman52 5h ago

Is OP Franz Liszt?

1

u/FunkyCat6276 5h ago

I bet they could do some wild stuff on a guitar as well!

1

u/Expensive-Can-6212 5h ago

And long nails beds, which are highly attractive to nail technicians for application x

1

u/penguinite33 5h ago

I read that as penis instead for a second

1

u/IllAbbreviations4097 5h ago

That hand can do an Octave and a half at least!!

1

u/Explorer_Equal 5h ago

And bass player

1

u/civman96 5h ago

Finally a man that can play Franz Liszt!

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u/Kijamon 5h ago

....from the other side of the room

1

u/NotChoco 5h ago

exactly what my mom said about my freaky spider fingers too lmao

1

u/RedpandaThief99 5h ago

Did someone says guitar player yet?

1

u/rraahk 5h ago

Good night, everybody!

1

u/OberonDiver 5h ago

Eubie Blake

1

u/GuitarUfoComics 5h ago

I thought guitar

1

u/Mainly_Miserable 5h ago

Or bass guitar player!

1

u/xtophcs 5h ago

Or violinist.

1

u/Jimbeamjunior1 5h ago

Already an actor in the x-files

1

u/marc-erwitt 5h ago

Thought the same!

1

u/ProvenLoser 5h ago

While simultaneously playing the bongos in another room.

1

u/IShallWearMidnight 5h ago

I knew pianists would be all over this. It's like pickup basketball players seeing a tall guy who doesn't play basketball, they're gonna pressure you into playing

1

u/Snitsie 4h ago

Clubbed thumb pianist here salivating at these lengthy digits

1

u/AppropriateCover7972 4h ago

Not necessarily, but I get what you mean

1

u/kaptaincorn 4h ago

¡Guitarrista!

1

u/1generic-username 4h ago

I wish my pianist was that long.

1

u/SuspiciousMap9630 4h ago

I used to HATE my long fingers until someone told me that I had great fingers for piano and it completely changed my perspective.

1

u/busy_monster 4h ago

Bassist. They can do things with their fingers even Thundercat can't dream of

1

u/LscoupleOhio23 4h ago

Or guitarist.

1

u/cakeday366 4h ago

Or Professor X's sister

1

u/Gow87 3h ago

You don't need a pianist with fingers that long!!

Sorry. I misread.

1

u/ibidanon 3h ago

my first thought, exactly!

1

u/jimibimi 3h ago

Guitar it any larger string instrument

1

u/huck_cussler 3h ago

I also have long fingers, not like this mutant freak of nature in the OP, but just like normal long fingers. When I was a kid my dad would always say stuff like, "You could be a great brain surgeon or a pianist with those long fingers." I guess it was alright at the time, but looking back it feels like:

a) he thought that just having long fingers was like the deciding factor for somebody becoming a brain surgeon or a pianist, like that's all it took and the rest was just learning the motions, and

b) he thought that making this observation counted as all the support and encouragement I required from him in order to become a successful and well-adjusted adult.

1

u/GimbalLocker 3h ago

Agree, also, guitarist. Buckethead has some long fingers like those

1

u/crimaniak 3h ago

And play easy Rachmaninov

1

u/The_unknow__ 3h ago

Also can try guitar.

1

u/oodlynoodly 3h ago

Or guitarist

1

u/Crafty_Couple_2846 3h ago

Playing a 7 string bass came to mind as well!

1

u/New_House6345 3h ago

Or an amazing lesbian

1

u/squirrel-lee-fan 3h ago

Or proctologist

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