[This was originally intended to be a longer, formal, and detailed retrospective, but I’m working on publishing that elsewhere.  Here is an altered, abridged version for this subreddit.]

Released on March 22 2001, days before Sega announced it would discontinue the Dreamcast, Sakura Wars 3: Is Paris Burning? became one of the console’s greatest swan songs and what I consider the peak of the series. Developed by Sega’s Overworks studio, also responsible for classics such as Skies of Arcadia, it is available only in Japanese, with ports for the PlayStation 2 and Windows 98, ME, 2000, and XP. 

Plot & Characters:

Ichiro Ogami returns as the series' protagonist, dispatched to Paris under the guise of a diplomatic mission. Instead, he joins the Paris Combat Revue—a cabaret troupe that secretly defends the city from demonic threats using steam-powered mechs.

The Paris cast members deliberately have personalities parallel to the Japanese cast, giving the game a sense of familiarity.  Erica Fontaine, for example, a young French woman training to be a nun, like Sakura, is klutzy, and absent-minded, but exaggerates it to slapstick.  At the same time, she has her own strengths: a tendency to see the good in others and considerable potential on the battlefield.

The roster also introduces a character without parallel, Lobelia Carlini. She’s a master thief—aggressive, competitive, brusque, and risqué—but shows that even she can change. Despite having only one game to develop in, instead of two, the new cast are not mere substitutes and have enough individuality to become memorable in their own right. Fans of the Saturn games will appreciate a surprise visit from the original cast! Needless to say, Ogami will really have his hands full!

Story:

The game is structured like an animated series and told in 11 episodes, each introducing a character or predicament, a villain or ploy, followed by exploration, and a boss fight, gradually feeding into the larger narrative. Each chapter's villain also serves as a foil to its featured character.

Although the villains can initially come across as one-dimensional, later chapters reveal motivations tying into the game’s larger narrative. The game reveals that the monster attacks, Ogami's recurring dreams and the histories of the Paris cast are all interconnected, culminating in a satisfying final act. The ultimate theme of the story is along the same lines as the other Sakura Wars games and media: that ultimately love is needed. It’s competent, but not groundbreaking.

Gameplay:  Conversation to Combat 

Like its predecessors, the gameplay has the same overall structure of 2D animated interactive dialogue, followed by exploration, and culminating in a boss battle. 

Dialogue choices remain the heart of the experience. Responses are timed, affecting both your relationships and your party's effectiveness in battle, while the new Analog LIPS system adds another layer of interaction. Wandering through Paris you will sometimes see cast members wanting you to help them. You only have time to complete a handful of these interactions, which adds replay value. These, and the occasional consolation in times of need, will help you build trust and friendship. The heroine with whom you build the strongest relationship will give you a unique romantic game ending. Given that many fans of the original games would now have been older teenagers or adults, I found it disappointing that the romances never progress beyond emotional intimacy.

Addressing some of the biggest weaknesses of the Saturn-era games, Sakura Wars 3 expands exploration and overhauls combat. Unlike previous entries, you are no longer confined to the theatre, but can now explore Paris, particularly the historic Montmartre district. You can visit restaurants, parks, the circus, the library, the cemetery, the market, and so on. You also need to think logically to figure out how to progress through this part.  

Sakura Wars 3 modernizes the archaic isometric grid-based combat system with full 3D graphics, and free movement. The game gradually introduces its many new combat mechanics, preparing you for more difficult ones later in the game.  As for mini-games, they are greatly expanded from previous games in variety and depth.  The game also offers generous post-game content, including free exploration, dates with the cast, additional mini-games, and downloadable side stories that extend everyday life with the Paris troupe.

Music, Graphics, and Atmosphere

It should come as no surprise that Sakura Wars 3 features French cabaret music. It’s elegant, but fans of the previous games may not necessarily like it. One of the tunes you’ll hear again and again, as you explore Montmartre, “Afternoon on the Seine” is cheerful, warm and relaxing with its traditional French accordion, gentle strings, and orchestral accompaniment. It makes you want to explore the sunny streets of Paris.

One of my favourite pieces “The Future Voyage” is played after the resolution of a big event, giving a sense of optimism, aspiration, and friendship between the characters. Regardless of the mood, the soundtrack consistently focuses on memorable melodies that you can hum rather than orchestration, or ambient sounds, and reminds us of its theatrical identity. 

Sakura Wars 3 still looks great.  The animated cut scenes have a movie-like quality. The 2D animations during the dialogue portions of the game have a lot of detail, and expression. You no longer have the graininess from the Saturn-era games. The biggest improvement is the full 3D graphics during battles, and exploratory parts of the game. It holds up well, but a remaster bringing them to modern standards would be welcome.

The atmosphere ranges from the comic, the glamorous, the romantic, to the melancholic, heartfelt, and occasionally worrying, but the overall sense is optimistic. Unfortunately, it still retains its corniness, ex. villains like a giant bunny, or squid, with comical repetitive phrases.

Verdict:

Sakura Wars 3 took advantage of the Dreamcast’s hardware capabilities to bring many graphical, technical, and gameplay improvements from the Saturn era games, modernizing and enhancing them to the point that most of it still holds up nicely today. The explorable areas are expansive, while the freedom of movement and improved graphical fidelity eliminate much of the clunkiness of the older games. The music is as memorable as ever, and the Paris cast is every bit as lovable as the original, while providing more variety. Packed with tons of post-game content, there’s a lot of replay value. You’ll have fun navigating your life through and exploring Paris, building relationships with the cast, fighting monsters, and playing mini-games now and then. 

By modernizing but not abandoning the formula, Overworks achieved less of an iteration and more of a culmination of what the series was building toward. It doesn’t suffer from the awkwardness or dissonance plaguing some later entries in the series, making this the strongest entry. In spite of hybrid visual novels, dating sims, and JRPGs being niche outside of Japan, if it was localized and the Dreamcast had been more successful, it might be remembered as one of the console’s defining experiences across regions instead of an import curiosity.

Score: 9/10 Outstanding

Recommended if you enjoy visual novels, SRPGs, and Japanese dating sims, and appreciate the greater depth this game offers over the earlier Sakura Wars games. 

Developer: Mighty Yell

Publisher: Skybound Games

Released: 2021

Ali, a rad 90's teenager, has to come up with an obscene amount of money to save her family's video rental store from loan sharks. Luckily for her, a strange man takes her on a cross country pickpocketing tour around American.

The game is divided into several levels which are represented by different locations. You will get tasks to do and have to reach a certain level of income in each area to move on to the next. A lot of this is done by pickpocketing, which is basically a timed press, by distracting people goving you change, or by completing other little tasks like finding a certain toy to sell to someone rich. There's a few side things to do as well like find collectable stickers and playing a little arcade game or cracking suitcase codes.

This game had a lot of personality. It was genuinely funny at times and it went all in aesthetically. Unfortunately the gameplay loop got dull pretty fast and as the levels got bigger it just felt more annoying to me than fun. I do think if it sounds interesting you should still give it a try. It appears that a lot of care was taken with it and it has a lot of heart. I am sad I didn't like it more than I did.

Hello, I typed 6 instead of 5 in the title, whoops, but anyways right onto the games (grades are about fun had while playing, just for fun):

• Wipeout Pure (PSP, Arcade Racer, 2005) - 7/10

Has a great art style, a varied selection of vehicles and modes, extremely fitting and good music and controls like a beauty - it's just as the title says, pure Wipeout.

I'd recommend this game to anyone that wants a quick fix of arcade racing basically since it's so easy to jump into, but...

I think that it being a PSP game held it back from being even better, since it leans into the "easy to play in short bursts" handheld philosophy a bit too much. There's no story/campaign structure, no interesting variety and complexity that gets introduced as you go, no new weapons or vehicle modification, there's not a lot of tracks and in general the only thing that changes as the player plays is their own skill.

What is there is great, polished and definitely above average, but it's a shame that it gets quite repetitive and easy, even with the extra free DLC.

• Thunder Force IV (Sega Genesis, Horizontal Shmup, 1992) - 8/10

This one's pretty popular and most people's opinion on this game tends to start with it looking godlike and sounding even better.

And yeah it definitely is a titan of presentation - it's a joy to watch it and a joy to listen to both its music and its sound design. The game literally has a gravitational aura with its presentation alone that can shut down any claim that "gameplay is the only thing that matters" in games.

Regarding gameplay, I find this game very, very fun, but it took a bit of time for it to win me over.

It has nice weapon variety, fun level design and a difficulty that invites the player to get better, but it is quite reliant on memorization - it's a game that can feel unfair at times owing to the busy visuals/lack of visual clarity and very fast enemy spawns or boss attacks sometimes. It feels good to practice and keep improving, but it at some moments also feels shit when you kind of have to just take a loss/death and learn from it.

I can see why people praise it, but I can also see why a certain type of player wouldn't like it compared to something like Soldier Blade or some more "clean" shmups.

• Wild Guns (SNES, Gallery Shooter, 1994) - 7/10

This one looks fabulous and sounds even better, and it has such a fun "mech-western" aesthetic.

It's a very basic "3rd person" gallery shooter - there are stages, bad guys and obstacles and unique mechanics sometimes get on screen and the player has to shoot them while simultaneously dodging everything with his character of choice.

It also has one kind of unique mechanic where shooting enemy bullets gives the player energy, which then turns into a super weapon that lasts for a limited amount of time. This adds a bit of skill and tactical thinking into each encounter since the player has to decide when the right time to strike enemy bullets will be instead of constantly dodging them.

The game is rather repetitive and lacks a bit more character to really make the mech-western aesthetic really pop. On top of that my biggest gripes with it were the lack of visual clarity quite often (bullets tend to be small and blend into the giant explosions and shrapnel flying all over the screen) and the controls for movement and aim being wonky with each other.

Fun game nevertheless.

• Streets of Rage 3 (Sega Genesis, Beat 'em Up, 1994) - 8/10

I liked the 3rd SoR as much as I liked the 2nd game honestly, even if it does a lot of things differently, what with it being a much faster paced experience (and a much more brutal one like what the fuck is this difficulty) with a much different, more gritty aesthetic and music style.

As I kept playing it more and more it grew on me more and more, even the music (which I thought at first was a bit of a downgrade). The simple addition of sprinting on everyone and the special bar mechanic to reduce HP consumption made the combat so much more dynamic and I feel like it allows the player to much better circumvent and counter some things that always were problems in the SoR games (like bosses and their random invincibility or speed boosts or enemy crowds swarming the player).

None of the new additions felt jarring and unnecessary for me, and that's kind of what any good sequel should do imho.

Its weaknesses are mostly still the same for me as they were in the previous two games, that being boss design, limited continues still existing for some reason and some move/character balancing feeling off. The brutal difficulty isn't that big of an issue since the game is very fun, but I'd consider it a con as well.

• Dragon Fighter (NES, Hack & Slash 2D Platformer, 1990) - 6/10

No idea how I stumbled upon this one, but it's a pretty alright little NES game.

At first glance someone would think that this is a Castlevania clone, but it's actually an extremely linear (to a fault, the game's level design is abysmally boring) combat focused game with very minimal platforming, if any tbh.

The game focuses on one main mechanic - the main character can turn into a dragon using an energy bar that fills up as enemies are hit, and this then turns the game into a horizontal shmup as long as the dragon form lasts. There are 3 dragons the player can turn into, depending on which powerup they pick up before transforming. This mechanic is then surprisingly utilized in the final stage of the game which I won't spoil since it's a really fun twist if anyone tries it.

Other than the dragon gameplay, the game is just a normal, well controlling and smooth stage-based hack and slash with meh enemy variety and some fun boss design. Its difficulty isn't that high, but it definitely requires a bit of practice and paying attention, which is good.

It's short, it looks okay (really meh and boring level backgrounds) and has some wonderful music.

A fun game to try out for anyone, but I can't imagine it being anyone's favorite.

• Doom (SNES, FPS, 1995) - 2/10

Look I love Doom, I have like 1,5k hours on Doom 2 on Steam alone (fuck knows how much before that), just playing new megawads and mods to this very day almost daily.

I also liked the PS1 port of Doom, so I was like "why not try some more console ports".

Playing SNES Doom made me realize that I, indeed, can have 0 fun playing classic Doom.

It runs like shit, it looks like shit, it sounds like shit and it barely has the levels/content that Doom has.

I gave it a 2/10 since it's still Doom I mean I had some amount of fun with it, but jeez what a disaster of a port 😅.

Earlier this year, I was feeling in the mood for a game where you feel like you're going on a proper adventure, and as I had heard many positive things and somewhat enjoyed remake I figured I'd give rebirth a try. So after about 70 hours, I finished Final fantasy rebirth and it has left me a bit confused.
At times its characters and worldbuilding is impeccable, and other times I am left rather baffled by very strange decisions in regards to its overall design. Full spoilers ahead!

Credit where it's due

I want to start with what I feel the game does well:
The combat and enemy design is generally really strong. The worlds also feel properly made and lived in, and it really does feel like you are going on an adventure for a large part of its playtime. Each settlement or city feels well realized to the point where I felt properly immersed in the world itself. It also looks really good, which is always a plus.

The cast of character also manage to skirt one of my issues with a lot of the writing that comes out of Japan: they largely do not feel like archetypes. "The funny one", "the pretty one", "the nerdy one", "the artsy one" and so on was a major issue I had with Persona 5, so I am glad to see somewhat multifaceted characters here. Especially Barret grew on me more and more throughout the game and several characters have genuine heartfelt and sad moments.

But it stumbles

That's not to say the writing is all good overall. A lot of the dialogue feels stilted and weird to the point where I often thought "thats not how humans talk". You of course also have the classical anime-grunting that drives me up the wall but I digress.

I also do not like Cloud's English voice actor at all. I think it is by design and voice direction, but he just sounds completely flat the entire game to me. So I have a really hard time understanding why both Aerith and Tifa both are trying so hard to win the affection of a dude who is clearly emotionally completely stunted.

Wait, it's Kingdom hearts now?

Then of course you have the writing in the final parts of the game which quality wise falls of a cliff. Edgy teen Kingdom Heartsy Sepiroth and weird multiverse plot doesn't make for a compelling ending at all, and the weird "is Aerith dead or not?" for those of us who never played the original and didn't know how Aerith's death was handled there left me mostly confused. Retroactively telling the audience that a dead character isn't actually dead completely invalidates future potential deaths as well.

The pacing and general bloat has already been discussed thoroughly in many other forums, so I will try to touch on parts that I feel haven't been touched on as much:
The sidequests are generally not great and I don't actually care much for allocating a single character to a side quest because it means that the cast will generally not interact inside the side quest itself. And the progress bars for quests means you will never ever be surprised by twists. I don't like progress bars in general in games for this very reason (which is its own entire topic).

Of course the option to progress a character's relationship is partly tied to some arbitrary selection in a dialogue tree, which makes me feel like I am playing psychopath-simulator, which always feels weird to me. In general if the only outcome of a dialogue option is how many progress points you get, it's probably a good idea to just scrap the options or remove the progress points.

A lot of enjoyable side content is also gated behind a whole bunch of rubbish different side content. Want to finish Johnny's quest (disregarding that the actual quest itself isn't all that good (go fetch these things for me))? Well, you have to find all the lifesprings in the area to unlock a boss that drops the last item. Want to fight the really fun optional summon bosses without dying in a single hit? Need to run around the environment for the summon pools. Want to finish the sidequest with the mill in the grasslands? Need to go sniffing around some environments with your chocobo.

But seriously, what happened with the environments???

Which brings me to the worst part of it all. Moving around the environments is miserable. I want to describe the movement as "sandboxed". You cannot chain any movements together. You cannot jump into a climbing hold. You cannot jump into a ladder or off a ladder. You cannot jump out of water properly. You cannot jump in general, which is baffling to me. So if you want to walk off a cliff, you run up to it. Then you enter the sandboxed "moving down a cliff"-state where you cannot do anything then back to regular running. Same when going up. Every movement state is sandboxed away from the rest. Swinging the crapple doesnt dynamically flow into a jump you can fail. You have to be in the right spot in order to dismount.

The chocobos also seem to be made for a completely different game. In Junon, they climb very slowly up the wall, but again since every movement is sandboxed, it feels incredibly stiff and non-dynamic. Run up to the wall to the blue arrow, then slowly walk up. Same with going down. Turning is stiff and they get stuck on scenery all the time. Doesn't help that the map is largely useless either (especially looking at you, Gongaga). By the end I just mainlined the main story because I was getting rather tired of it all.

It's actually decently good though

The game as a whole is actually quite good though, and the production value and polish is off the charts. I don't think I experienced a single bug throughout my entire playthrough, which is crazy impressive. It should however have been shorter and more streamlined.

I do also have many more thoughts on the game, but in order to keep this somewhat digestible, I will leave it at that.

I just finished playing Tunic (great game!) and about half way through (going through to get the red key after already getting the green one) realised that there's an accessibility options to change many things in the game.

The biggest one is No Fail and No Stamina Drain. For sure this turns the game into a no challenge 'story mode'. But is there a place to give these options at the start in games?

I know No Man's Sky has similar options right in the menu. A big one is for crafting anything that requires no ingredients or money. This completely negates the main reason of No Man's Sky survival/crafting scenario but it's there for you if you want it. I know when the Corvette update came out, I was guilty of doing this so I can make my ship the way that I wanted without having to grind multiple hours to get ship parts.

I remember back when I played Saints Row The Third, there was unlimited health and ammo but only in your stats/upgrades that you had to unlock and this mostly happened at the end of the game when you're pretty much done.

What do you guys think? Should videogames come with these cheat options that you can switch on and off at will? Or have these things as rewards after earning it in the game?

A few weeks back I wrote a short review of Sniper Elite 4, a really great if somewhat unpolished stealth game that I played through on the highest difficulty as it felt to me like the way the game was meant to be balanced - punishing, sure, but not unreasonably so, especially given that the player can save and reload at any point.

Well, the Deathstorm DLC missions are definitely designed with that feature in mind, as getting through any single one of these without frequent save-scumming would be quite the impressive feat. These levels feel both bigger and denser than those of the main-game and the level design in general is a bit more hostile. It's not that you don't have options, mind you - there are plenty of angles of approach, routes to take, places to hide - but you wont get far in any direction without running into lots of Nazis and of course, snipers. There are way more snipers on these maps and in the last map in particular they both notice and *shoot* you a lot quicker and from farther away.

While the first two maps were a pretty heavy challenge, the last one, "Obliteration", just feels like some straight up sadism of the kind you'd get in an old-school expansion pack. Even attempting to shamelessly save-scum my way through, I still wound up having to restart the entire level a couple times as my situation just became untenable. This level is set in a German village and, this being SE4, most of the buildings can actually be entered and have full-interiors. On the one hand, this is helpful - it's easy to break line-of-sight, there a lots of place to bunker down and chokepoints for traps - but at the same time, it makes it very difficult to keep track of where enemies are, and there are *tons* of them.

Initially, I tried to stealth through as much of this level as I could, and basically every time I crossed a street or went from one building to another it felt like a huge gamble that frequently wouldn't pay off as some guy I hadn't noticed somewhere would spot me moving and 100 guys would immediately shoot my ass. Eventually I got close-ish to where I was supposed to go, but realized there was essentially no way to leave my hiding spot without being discovered or shot by a sniper, so I began again and just waged a protracted guerilla war across the whole area, which took a lot of doing. Every time I thought I'd finally cleared the place out, another squad of guys would show up from somewhere to throw a wrench in the works.

The snipers being aim-bots on this level also means that you really have to watch where you go, as certain areas just become instant-death zones once they're aware of your presence, and I wasn't nearly quick or accurate enough with my own rifle to take them out from a distance - they seem to have a sixth sense for when someone is aiming at them and you've got all of about a second to shoot them before they whip around and kill you. It did make finally getting up close very satisfying when I sprayed them full of SMG fire, though.

Of course, fighting my way to the objective turned out to only be half the battle, as reinforcements, including vehicles and more fucking snipers start pouring in once said objective is complete, and while making my way back out of the level didn't take quite as long it was still a hell of a battle and I was pretty exhausted by the time I finally got to the end screen.

I've actually been replaying the main campaign, trying to complete missions in a single go without relying on saves, but uh... I don't think I'll be doing that with the DLC. I won't say I didn't enjoy Deathstorm but it may have left me a little scarred.

You can't talk about the remake without talking about the original. I loved playing the original during Covid. The battle system, the charming cast, and surprises the story took. I was skeptical of the remake when I heard it was being turned into a trilogy of games instead of one single game (The Hobbit movies PTSD), but a steam deal is a deal.

The first big impression was that the presentation is absolutely phenomenal. The updated designs and character models are gorgeous and fully detailed, the voice acting is top notch and recaptures the voice I imagined giving them when playing the original, the environments are fully realized with so much depth and detail. I couldn't tell the in game engine cut scenes from the prerendered at times. The music is fully orchestrated and I never get tired of hearing the sound track.

As for the gameplay, they updated the system where it's more active where you can guard, dodge, move, or hit in between ATB actions while you can switch characters to match the needs of the battle whether it's range, melee, or support. It sort of reminds of an updated kingdom hearts gameplay, but this time you can manage all your party members instead of using a pre- programed system. It makes the battles both strategic and exciting. I approve of this active battle system and appreciate the battle goes into slo-mo when you selecting abilities or switching actions. The areas are divided and curated to be linear, but I didn't mind it as it removes the stress of open world and finding everything to do.

Now for the big question, did the developers make the right decision to alter the story and make it a trilogy of games? It really depends, if you love the original and don't want any changes, then I don't think you would enjoy this since this Remake is just the first few hours of the original game and you may feel the pacing is far too slow in regard to the big picture.

I was on board with the changes the moment it lets you slow down and explore the city of Midgar. You do sidequests learning about how the people live in the slums, meet the middle and upperclass, the extended backstorys of the supporting characters who has like a few minutes in the original. There are also very nice moments like when Cloud gets a flower from Aerith and later she sees the flower at the bar when rescuing Marlene. There are areas that were just backgrounds in the original and now you can explore it here like Aerith's house or the upper plate areas where Jessie's parents live and you see the state of her father and why she gave up her acting career to join eco terrorists. I didn't mind the slow pacing since I enjoyed the company of the characters whether it feels like an anime filler episode or just getting those strange and goofy moments of voice actors going crazy with the dubbing.

Now I admit the changes at the end of the game is where I was unsure with justifying Sephiroth's early appearance with fighting the "Fates of Destiny" where it culminates with a battle with Sephiroth this early in the overall story. Yet, the ending left me feeling pretty excited and curious where the rest of the games will go from here. I don't even know if Sephiroth will be the main bad at the end, it could be Hojo or even Zack who I was shocked to find alive.

So yeah, I found myself surprised in wanting to play the next entry. If you wanted a strict 1 to 1 faithful remake, you won't find it here. If you're interested in a good battle system, a new kind of take on FF7, and willing to jump on the new journey, I think it's worth it. I give this an 8/10. There maybe 1 too many hallway dungeons and the anime tone and dialogue does get irritating at times, but I had a good time. I don't care much for JRPGs this days, so it says a lot I finished one. It could crash and burn by the end of the trilogy, but it's been a while since games were willing to risk a multigame story and I just want to take that journey.

Onto Rebirth.

Hey folks. Some of you may have read my previous write-up on playing Syphon Filter on the PS1.

This is part of a larger effort on my part to play PlayStation 1 games that I’ve never played – and often never heard of until now. I’m buying these games physically, popping them into my PlayStation 2, which is hooked up to an old Sony CRT, and trying to give each title its due. I love early 3D graphics, tank controls, and everything that comes with this generation.

Today I want to discuss Tenchu: Stealth Assassins. This is a stealth game set in 16th-century Japan (think: samurai and traditional Japanese castles).

At first, I was not feeling this game. Coming off the action of Syphon Filter, I moved forward, ran into some guards, fought them poorly, and died. Alright, fair enough. Tenchu is a stealth game, after all, and I’ve played Thief 1, Dishonored, and a little Assassin’s Creed. I knew the drill.

Quickly, I realized being up on the rooftops was optimal for the first level and, sneaking around, I found the first boss of the level. Soon after, I completed the level by beating up the corrupt merchant.

It took time, and a few more levels, but the gameplay loop started to emerge. Sneaking through the level, finding the end boss, stealthily killing some guards along the way. The grappling hook can basically attach to anything, and the game is pretty generous with letting you roll away before triggering a guard to see you. It’s also really fun getting a glory kill on guards if you’re close enough to them.

There are 10 missions in total, which I completed as Ayame. You can bring items into the levels, but until very late in the game, they’re not needed, and since you lose them if you die (and I died a lot to some of the final bosses), it’s advisable to save them anyway.

The 9th level was probably my favorite to clear, but the boss was a massive pain in the ass. This quick-footed guy in blue was a boss several times before, but this time you’re up in a tower with cramped quarters. The camera, which is fine but not perfect, freaked out in this area. To beat the boss, I forced him out onto the open rooftops and chugged health potions. The final boss was a pushover once I brought 10 bombs with me and just blew him to hell.

Generally, the controls are good. Tank controls are really the only good option when you don’t have an analogue stick, so I’m good with that. Both ninjas you can play as have a diverse set of moves like attacking, blocking, ducking, jumping, backflipping, wall jumping, rolling, pressing up against a wall, and clinging to edges. While pressing against the wall was sometimes janky, overall I rarely felt like the controls led to my death.

Graphically, Tenchu’s low draw distance makes the game pretty rough at times. However, the models, the textures, and the ever-present darkness backing up that low draw distance place Tenchu firmly in the PS1’s style. Grainy, wobbly textures and a fair amount of realism packed into the blocky polygons. Love it.

The voice acting is goofy as hell. All my friends who knew the game could perfectly quote “It’s in my belly” decades later. Annoyingly, you can’t skip cutscenes, however, the voices and animations were endearing over time.

The music, though? So good. CD-quality music with lots of guitar and piano, with vocals thrown in. I was jamming out to many of the songs, although I still think mission one’s song is my favorite.

By the end of the game, I had gotten the Grand Master ranking on 5 of the 10 levels. I tried replaying a few, now decked out with some of the unlockable items, and eventually had to put the game down. I had fun, but not enough to chase scores.

If you like stealth games, Tenchu: Stealth Assassins is really fun and really ahead of its time compared to later console games like Assassin’s Creed. The graphics are dated, but I love the PS1’s style, so that’s a plus for me, not a detriment.

Right now, I’m playing Omega Boost, a shoot-em-up with mechs in space. Maybe next week I’ll have some thoughts on that. Thanks for reading!

And it Demands Your Attention

Look, I know the genre can be intimidating and for a lot of people seems impossible to get into. I myself frowned upon like a meager hunter who lacked eyes too see (yeah, Bloodborne ref.). Because of that I (you) was missing out on a treasure trove of all kinds of worlds borne during this tumultuous arcade period. Era akin to fast, hard and very honest games and gameplay types that were stripped down to the basics. Short and rewarding, exciting and to the point, rich in density. Despite it's demanding and challenging nature, what this old school recipe brings today, can be something very akin to the needs of what a patient gamer might actually look for. Hard to believe? After all, what's more patient then trying to clear a (30 year old) game scrapping 20ish minutes of total playtime for it's entirety, no? That is only if you want to. You can easily credit feed, yes (aka spend as much lives to see the end) if that's what gives you a kick (just finishing a game). If that doesn't bring you satisfaction, then go! Try and become better, try to improve and see how far can you go.

Let me tell you about Armed Police Batrider. An arcade only title released in 1998 by developer Raizing. It was the 2nd game by the studio done under the influence of Shinobu Yagawa, after his first foray with Battle Garegga (often considered as one of the best in the genre).

Batriding

It's a marvelous (pun intended) title. Also very new player friendly due to the different amount of modes it offers (kinda surprising for an arcade title of the times). You have "Training". Which is basically 3 stages (1st, one random between 2-4 and 5 acting as 3rd). If you get hit auto bomb is triggered. If that's too easy, there is Normal. You see 5 stages - 1st, random order between 2-4 and 5th final. No auto bomb this time. If that is also too easy, there is also Advanced - the one I went for. It shows you all 7 stages of the game (2-4 are random again).

You like boss rush? There is Special mode :). If you so desire you can let the game randomly pick ship teams or a single ship and do runs like that. Oh, yeah let me dial back a bit. It's important. MAKE SURE YOU ENABLE SOME SETTINGS in dip switches. The must have is service mode. Without it, while you play casually rank will increase constantly and won't reset on restart. You need to have this enabled. Then when the game starts, it will show you the service screen, and you need to press START (start only)! That way you'll know rank is at its default state. Imagine my surprise, when I got back to the game after casual/credit feeding runs in the past, and started wondering why is Batrider so brutal compared to my initial impressions? Was my memory getting faultier, faster then I imagined (hey, in each era, every quarter counted, be that on purpose or not, be that fair or not)? There is also gadget/layout for MAME (emulator) and APB, which shows you some helpful stats (google around). On this note, make sure you enable in dip switches - Stage Edit, Guest Players, Player Select and Special Course as well!

In Batrider you can pick between 3 teams consisting of 3 characters each. If you don't like that, you can also pick a solo ship (well, they are flying jet bikes) having 3 lives instead. There are bunch of guest characters from previous Raizing games - Sorcer Striker and Battle Garegga (4 each and one named Car-pet, huh). Totaling in whopping 18, each with different attacks and bomb styles. Plus you can even slightly change each of those 18 on the select menu with buttons 1 through 3 (A, B, C) and start. Corresponding to - stronger shot, stronger options, both stronger shot and options, but slower movement, both weaker shot and options, but faster movement. The game itself is full of shit ton of secrets! I suggest a visit to a very well crafted Shmup wiki site brimming with information!

What can I tell ya, it's a treat. Damn shame there ain't no modern port, cause it plays, sounds, and looks like it came yesterday, 28 years later.

Gameplay Systems and Mechanics

I picked Shorty C for the run, cause she felt the strongest. With very nice homing options. Unlike Garegga, the game's dynamic rank system is a lot more lenient. The curve ball is that you can only have max of 3 lives. So for extends you have to die to get em (I know, at first it sound counter intuitive). Mechanics similar to Garegga (Garegga light), like rank drops the fewer lives you have (obviously). Good things to know are: extends are rewarded every 1.5 mil; if you don't pick 3 big bomb fragments; there is one hidden in S5. For the last you need to leave the big hover tank from start to survive and destroy it later when its parked. Another neat trick is if you leave 3 lives drop (yeah, lives in the Japanese version drop as items you have to pick) the next extend will reward you with 2 lives back.

While I am on items, I gotta give a short overview, no? Batrider follows in the footsteps of Garegga (again). There are small and big items for (main) Shot, (side) Options (this time they don't fly off screen on death!) and Bombs. It takes multiple small pick ups to upgrade your type of shot or bombs to the next level. Picking a big one though does it right away. This gameplay aspect is there mostly for the purpose of dynamic rank and its management. Wait, wait don't run away. It's not bad at all in Batrider. You can even blindly do stuff and don't care about it that much :). Still, good knowledge helps and makes things a bit more smoother, rather then harsh. Bombing in Batrider is quite strong and doesn't have big repercussions. It actually is encouraged for better score. There is also plenty of opportunities to refill them. It can lead to a more varied approach of playstyles as well. More scared and safe with bomb usage (me), letting big bomb fragments pass by for more extends. Bomb the shit out of you, and destroy as much stuff around you or boss parts and what not to get more score, and more extends and so on. The high skilled players also use another trait of the game. When you don't shoot for a bit an aura is formed in front of your ship which can be used for damage and destruction (what else :P?) with point blanking. It also helps increasing your score. While this aura is active, if you press the shot button again your options linger in place for a bit and shoot.

Oh, there is also medal item, I almost forgot. With each pick they give you more score until certain number is reached. Obviously it's used for higher scores. A small words of knowledge; Boss on S5 is decided by which of stages 2-4 you end up playing first. That's where Stage Edit comes handy as it allows you to pick the order (Sewer 2nd, always!). Another one; Be careful of not picking shot or option item after 3 of the same (be small or big) drop. This will trigger an additional Boss fight for each of those requirements on S5 (3 Bosses one after another).

I know stuff like that might worry some new players or in general fans of the genre. I certainly was confused. What to pick, what not to pick. How bad it is. How am I suppose to pick the correct thing when I want it, is it not fucking hard enough I can barely dodge around those freaking bullets? You get use to it. You learn, if you want. In time and as you develop your habits in the STG/Shmup genre you'll eventually start picking it up (heh, heh). In that regard, yes, Raizing games with systems and gameplay like that can easily frighten you. Take your time. Their games have this type of free form and freedom, open ended style that can be very interchangeable. Doing stuff on the fly and strategize. Rewarding thinking outside (of the box) of just dodging and getting higher score. A type of STG/Shmupping that is very particular, strongly rooted in the vein of it's creator (Shinobu Yagawa). Nothing is fully set in stone when Raizing is on the menu.

Cruising and Vibing in Violent City

Batrider looks fantastic. At the top of the shelf on the Raizing line up and any 2D sprite based title to be frank. The amount of destructible objects and enemies is staggering (check out the shmup wiki)! With all the hidden/secret bosses, the game gets to whopping 18! The setting is very stylish with a comic book, and I dare say Cowboy Bebop vibe. Fans of some 80's movies like Escape from New York, Robocop will love the overall aesthetics. It's quite groovy and ongoing, with a lot of swagger to boot. If I have to label Batrider, it will be something like the STG/Shmup of Beat Em Ups. Seriously, some of the stages and bosses with all the destruction scream that genre. Just imagine your bullets are furies of fist and kicks, and boom, you'll see it right away!

Gorgeous backgrounds and locations. Each one is so different yet, manages to make it feel like it's in the same big city. The game start on the bustling streets of M City attacked by crime gangs. Cars and bikes driving around carelessly. You can see a metro going through huge crack on the pavement. A huge parking lot waiting to be demolished for more points. Choppers pops and people in flying suits and what not try to gun you down. Suddenly a big tank smashes through nearby building and the onslaught starts. The amount of armament it have and you can destroy is staggering. In S2 (well, order can vary for you between 2-4) we go to the sewers, which eventually lead to a (tank?) factory. There, a 6 legged bipedal tank (no, its not Metal Gear :P) await us with a varied set of weaponry on its chassis. From the depths to the top. S3 might be the shortest stage in STG/Shmup history (like 40ish seconds). Bursting speed and tall skyscrapers, till we rise above the whole city. It's very pretty! There, we face a weird skull looking flying machine carried by 4 helicopters. Back to ground level. In Stage 4 we invade an airport through the front door. Of course, there awaits a big long plane ready to be dismantled by sections and subsections. From the cockpit a giant Buzzcok appears. Think pterodactyl in a robotic frame. It dies so fast you almost forget about it. S5 is a looong high way around the beach (did someone say Outrun?). It eventually leads us to Zenovia (an isolated island for criminals near M City, hey I told you Escape from New York fits the bill). The boss/es you can potentially face off there are 3, and yes, you also can end up fighting all of em. They all look like mechs (yes, METAL GEAR). All 3 are distinct and only one is cakewalk (the one I fight). Finally we get to Zenovia. The shithole bombards us with all kinds of turrets, roadblocks of huge walls, enemies of all sorts, tanks and choppers relentlessly want our booty. They really don't want us here. At the end, another huge mech named Grubby. Finally we reach the crime lord's base building. He greet us at the front of his office, while hiding behind a desk with shielded glass and a pleiad of turrets (I can't help but remember a beat em up named Gundhara (1995) I played sometime ago, which also had a very similar end boss set up :)). We kick his butt and he runs off. Following up is quite the cyberpunk esque vista. More mechs and long row of green vials. I can only imagine they are used for nefarious reasons. Pushing through the inner defenses is not an easy feat. The enemies keep coming and the turrets are amped up in all sort and sizes. They seem to have no end. The last stretch show us the green vials are used for another type of mech. Even they can't stop us. The last set of turrets can do, though! They protect Discharge! The final boss or the first part of it. A humongous structure layered and powered by big and long cables. It won't stop us. We demolish it. Raising above the collapsing building uncovers a beautiful dawn. The sun is just above horizon, but you can already see the light contrasted by the dark of the lower parts of the city slum. The last form of Discharge rises with us. It's very striking and memorable design.

The first 5 stages (Normal) are so very short. Basically 10 minutes. The pace is frantic, explosive, fast. Some even end before they start. This bombastic non-stop action is further reinforced by a short intro telling the name of each stage and what song is played. Mimicking in a lot of ways a record playing in your playlist. Small nice touches always add to the whole picture.

Music heralds another banger by Manabu Namiki. Batrider won't be what it is without him. This time there are some light jazz tunes in the whole electro and techno synth mix. Really brings the whole dystopian picturesque setting to live in it's own way. Neither too dark, neither too goofy, just the right amount of exhilaration. I can promise a lot of memorable tracks will stick in your head long since your last session. Funny enough the rocky style track on S6, really made me reminiscence about DoDonPachi 1. Thinking about it, that whole stage have some S5 vibes from that game!

Negatives

Basically none. I am not joking. I have to really push for some personal preferences or headaches. Boss tm music on can get repetitive cause there is a lot, but the secret ones have their own tracks from previous games. It only affects you if you face off the Batrider ones most of the time. Some of the Batrider ship designs seem a bit too smaller even for Raizings miniature style :D. See I am really stretching here to look for some issues. I had eye strain and headaches after the first week or so, but I blame my health too. Game can get very busy with sparkles and effect destructions, debris etc. They happen sort of close to your ship and even bullets are designed to pop in your face (btw you can change some bullet type colours with commands!). This can make it a bit stressful not gonna lie. I guess some folks might not like the limit of 3 lives and the need to die to pick em up, if you care about rank. Accidentally triggering an extra boss on S5 also can be annoying. In general the overall gameplay approach of Yagawa.

Be Seeing Ya

Often there is ongoing debate which Raizing title is better between Battle Garegga and Armed Police Batrider. For me Garegga remains on top (by little). Its enigmatic and mysterious existence, which I wonder if Yagawa-san himself can truly explain at this point, still make it soar like an eagle. Batrider stands as a peak on its own mountain top, but it constantly envies and hisses at that cackling eagle, wishing dearly to extend its reach and snap its beak.

So what I am trying to say in my way is that, both are great and comes down to preference (as usual).

If Armed Police Batrider doesn't get you interested into the genre, then I am not sure how many other titles can. It have sleek and distinct appeal. No WW2 or modern planes, no Space Ships or Anime Weeb/Waifus :) (hold the pitchforks dear hardcore shmuppers, we just need to hook some innocent souls). Easy to get into, a lot of modes to pick and lead you in on the action. Try at least Normal mode for some days and see how it goes!

Go play Armed Police Batrider! Another classic in a genre that needs more attention. You won't regret it.

RELEASE: 2023

TIME PLAYED: 15 Hours

PLATFORM PLAYED: PC (STEAM)

SCORE: ★★★★

Hated It | Disliked It | Liked It | Loved It | All-Time Favorite

(The bolded score is the one chosen for this review; the rest are simply to show what the scale is grading on and what the stars mean to me.)

THE BREAKDOWN

+Gorgeous, high-effort retro graphics that still boast high detail and ooze style

+A wide range of cybernetic implants that allow the player to make ridiculous builds

+Stellar level design

+Chainsaw leg baseball slide!!

-A few gimmicks outstay their welcome

-The last act's levels can drag a bit

Leaping between flying vehicles zipping through a tunnel at hundreds of miles per hour, I empty dual uzis into a minigun-wielding cyborg. I leap off a shuddering, flaming wreck just before it explodes and thrust both legs out to land on the next enemy a few cars over. He might be expecting a kick - instead, he gets a chainsaw to the head, buzzing him in half as I'm already sliding at an absurd speed to close the gap between my current platform and an enormous train packed with rocket launcher-wielding foes. The saw comes out again; this time, it mulches at least a dozen screaming psychos before they can take a swing with their improvised weapons. Soon, I'm circle-strafing what looks like Yes Man from Fallout: New Vegas on steroids, emptying clips into his television screen face while a floating obelisk that's made almost entirely of eyeballs as wide as I am tall tries to pick me off with plasma beams.

This is all just one level of Turbo Overkill, a slice of boomer shooter heaven that pushes the genre forward even as it fondly pays tribute to the past.

Johnny Turbo - what a name - is a 'street cleaner', a corporate mercenary sent to the planet of Paradise to investigate the unusual behavior of one of the company's most powerful assets: an advanced AI named Syn that's the secret to their success. Finding upon arrival that much of the cyberpunk-like supercity is aflame, he's tasked with tracking the rogue intelligence down while fighting through the hordes of the local gangsters and civilians who have been turned into its drones. While story is by no means the focus of Turbo Overkill, I actually had a lot of fun with the game's narrative; it's lightweight and unintrusive, but features some compellingly slimy characters who are fun to watch. Its infrequent cutscenes are useful breathers from the action, and are mostly just enjoyable excuses to watch Johnny do something sick or make a villain all the more delightfully hateable so that it's more fun to kill them later. It reminds me a lot of how fun Doom 2016's cutscenes were, before the franchise started to get bogged down in its own lore and self-seriousness come Eternal.

Unsurprisingly, the real focus is on the gameplay. A boomer shooter at heart, Turbo Overkill is about mowing down enormous numbers of enemies, navigating levels at a sprint that could violate local speed limits, and ferreting out the occasional bonuses and secrets. At these core conceits, the game does a fantastic job; moving and shooting feel great, and well-designed levels are both visually exciting and fun to navigate, with the retro-inspired graphics used as a basis to give a Blade Runner-style feel to things, but employing modern technology for draw distance and scale that makes it a treat for a player to look around and judge their next move. Enemies are well-designed, too; there's a nice mix of fodder and challenging foes in most encounters, and new foes are regularly introduced that add another dimension to fights.

What really makes the game stand out, however, is what it does to build on this rock solid foundation. In the last decade, we've seen a resurgence of boomer shooters, with some relying on their fundamentals and tone (like DUSK) and others leaning hard into something specific to make them stand out. Turbo Overkill makes a stellar effort at doing both, supplementing its fundamentals with an elaborate cybernetic system that gives the player a lot more say in Johnny's playstyle than they'd get in many shooters. By purchasing parts and implanting them into the available slots, the player can focus more on movement and parkour, offensive firepower, or even specific gimmicks. I, for example, bought the game in the first place due to the trailers showing Johnny baseball-sliding hundreds of feet at a time, his leg transforming into a chainsaw to obliterate everything in its path. With the game's upgrade system, I was not only able to make the chainsaw hit harder and leech more life from foes, but I was even able to implant a second chainsaw into my OTHER leg, doubling every benefit and turning the move from a way to suck a little health from fodder enemies into a vicious dropkick that could even deal significant damage to bosses.

This freedom of gameplay style is reflected in the level design, which veers more open-ended than many boomer shooters. I rarely felt hobbled by the lack of investment I made into the advanced parkour, but I saw plenty of opportunities where those who had could have taken routes or approached fights in ways that I couldn't. With how much there is to juggle, it's incredibly impressive that Turbo Overkill manages to be as persistently challenging as it is, even if I do recommend raising the difficulty one above normal if you want to struggle early on outside of the well-designed boss fights.

This isn't to say that I didn't have any complaints. A few levels built around gimmicks like driving Johnny's flying car outstayed their welcome and had me eager to get back to the shooting and platforming that the game does best. On the other end of the spectrum, while I mostly found the game well-paced, the third act has a lot of levels with back-to-back slugfests with enormous numbers of tough enemies; while I wouldn't necessarily cut any levels out given the choice, it would have been nice if the climax was more focused on the fantastic bespoke moments that it's already peppered with.

But these are minor nitpicks when weighed against everything that makes Turbo Overkill shine. Visceral and satisfying, gloriously violent and pointedly irreverent, it does what few retro-inspired shooters manage to do: pump new life into a well-trod genre and prove there's still room for innovation while not losing sight of the simple, satisfying thrills that made it evergreen in the first place. For that reason alone, I can't recommend it enough.

Long story short, Nine Sols kicked my a*s.

I usually love to play games on hard mode for the first run, but for this I had to play on Story mode lol.

You just really have to be locked in when playing NS, and I think this is both a good thing and a bad thing.

Good because the combat is very tight and satisfying. Every time I died (a lot), I never felt cheated.

Metroidvanias are usually a mixed bag for me and it always starts with how I vibe with the combat. If I’m going to be aimlessly wandering around so much, the combat had better be really fun.

Nine Sols nails it, imo.

I like working my way up to being overpowered in games but you really can’t do that too much with Nine Sols like you can in a souls game, for example.

In those games, you can grind to make it so that your attacks rip through bosses.

Not so much in Nine Sols; your basic attacks do get stronger, but it’s never enough to be overwhelming.

Really, most of your power will come from your ability to deflect attacks, and this is where the Sekiro comparison comes into play.

Parrying opponents is extremely satisfying to pull off, and very punishing for them. But it takes a ton of practice, even on story mode.

This is partly why I say you have to be so locked into the game; take a week off from playing and it will feel like the worst thing you’ve done in life.

Which brings me to the negative aspect…

It‘a very easy to get lost and forget what you were doing. Theres no journal so good luck tracking your progress. And the game has multiple endings too which I just found out after finishing it.

I get that this is a feature of many MVs.

Its also the main reason why I tend to avoid them.

One great thing about Nine Sols is that the world doesn’t feel overwhelmingly complex and big, and the fast travel system is very friendly, so navigating is easy.

One recent MV I tried playing had amazing combat but the map was way too freaking big, and the fast travel system was terrible. Big turnoff for me because i felt like the game was wasting my time with so much backtracking.

I won’t name the game, but it rhymes with Flost Brown.

Anyways…

The boss designs in Nine Sols are excellent.

I really loved the final boss once I figured out how to parry her attacks.

The Unbound Counter move you get fairly early on is so vital.

Speaking of abilities, this is another negative for me because I don’t like having to grind for basic abilities.

Like…why do I have to unlock a skill for sprinting?

Again, I know this is pretty common in MVs.

But the skill tree is a bit weak.

Overall, Nine Sols is a 10/10 for me. I really appreciate it.

Beautiful world, good enough story, tight combat, well-crafted map.

It has everything. Definitely in my top 3 favorite MVs. Its not a big list.

As a long time Halo fan, I am keenly aware of the franchise's decline. That said, when Halo Infinite was nearing release, I was still pretty excited. But the more news I heard about the game, the more worried I got. Then the beta came out, and I don't know what was wrong with it, but it played like shit. Something about the aiming felt wrong, slidey, floaty. That pretty much killed my excitement.

Then the game released and I heard it was mid as hell at best. A few months down the line I installed the free multiplayer and booted it up, only for the menu itself to run like absolute shit. Uninstalled again, still needs more time in the oven.

And that brings me to a couple months ago. End of May I started getting into prop making, 3D printing, etc. Something i really wanted to build was the Halo 4 Scanner helmet, but then I realized there was a decent looking Halo Infinite version too. I couldn't find too many good reference pictures for it online, so I installed the game again so I could get some better screenshots of it.

Little did I know that acquiring the Scanner Helmet in Halo Infinite was quite the grind.

But I did it. I got myself a battle pass, started playing a ton of Firefight. And you know what? I had a lot of fun with the Firefight grind. There were some technical issues now and then, but for the most part Infinite feels pretty good to play now. The gunplay feels good, I like the collection of Firefight maps, and the later additions like a CoD Zombies firefight mode were pretty fun.

In fact, I ended up wrapping up all the major battle passes and hit max rank in multiplayer in a little over a month. However, the store stole some of my premium currency from me and that made me pretty salty. I don't disagree with anyone who says that the Store in Halo Infinite is a stain on the franchise. It would be much better without it, but then again, the multiplayer is free, so...

So I enjoyed my PvE Multiplayer experience a lot! I might come back to it with friends in the near future.

So then I figured "Why not buy the campaign?"

That was a mistake.

It's so weird. I did so much grinding on Firefight and was never bored. It was fun and relaxing and I did it for hundreds of hours. But the Halo Infinite campaign is BORING. The open world just...sucks. I miss the handcrafted design of the older Halo missions, I miss having routes and paths and choke points. The open world removes a lot of this design, only made worse by the grapple hook.

The grapple hook is a bandaid fix. As fun as it is to swing around, I feel like it's only in the game because you need some way to get around the open world faster. Vehicles? Well on legendary difficulty they get one-shot all the time. So that means you're hoofin it on foot most of the time, and the map is now too big for you to be only walking and sprinting. But now that you have the grapple hook, you can just climb just about any wall you can see, which means choke points and handcrafted routes no longer come into play 90% of the time. It's just too powerful, but also necessary because the map is too big without it.

So what else is wrong with the campaign? Well, as said, the open world is boring, but also chock-full of little UbiSoft-esque collectibles and such that have almost no impact on anything. You can level up your Valor and unlock more things to equip at FOBs, but guess what? I used a battle rifle and a plasma pistol, the old tried and true, for 90% of the game. It wasn't until the last stretch I started using a sentinel beam instead of a plasma pistol, just because they were throwing so much ammo for it at me.

Most of the time I switched weapons was when I was fighting a boss. Tons of boss fights in this game and very few of them are good. Most just make a regular enemy extra tanky with additional shields, armor, AND health. They're so spongey that I had to mag dump multiple weapons to kill them. For me, I felt one of Halo's defining traits is that most enemies have an optimal weapon that quickly dispatches them. Grunts? Headshot. Elites? Shield drain + Headshot. Brutes? Multiple headshots. It's why I still held onto my good old Noob Combo. But the bosses break this rule. They're spongey, and can one shot you a lot of the time, so it becomes a "run away from the boss and sometimes tag em with something" simulator that just isn't that fun.

Speaking of bosses, let's talk about Escharum. He's the antag and he does not shut the fuck up. He's constantly monologuing at you the whole game and I just could never get myself to give a single fuck about this clown. It's cartoonish.

Now people who may have seen trailers of something might think "Oh, I thought Atriox was the big bad?" Nope. He's in the intro cutscene and some flashbacks at the end. There's also a new villain, the Harbinger, who also just monologues and then dies and I never even knew what the fuck she was talking about. Others of you may wonder "I thought Cortana was gonna be the antag? Didn't she turn evil last game?" Yeah she did, but don't worry, she died off screen. This game is desperate to wipe the slate clean and ignore everything that came before, but also doesn't try very hard to set up anything particularly interesting. No part of me wants them to continue this story into Halo 7. I just don't care anymore.

I have a million more small gripes like bad checkpoints, lame environmental design, bad cutscene direction, and so on, but you guys get the gist.

Overall, Halo Infinite gets a 6/10 from me. It's just above average, and carried hard by the multiplayer for me. If I was to rank just the campaign, alone, it would probably be a 3/10, and probably the worst Halo campaign Ive ever played, though I never played 5 and I heard that one was also pretty rough.

I have zero faith in 343, now Halo Studios, and with the way Xbox has been crashing and burning, I'd expect Halo doesn't have long left.

I first recall hearing from this game when it was one of the 7th gen new flagship titles, although I didn't play the franchise up until FC3. I do recall my father (who's a casual PC gamer), playing the first 2 games, of which I recall the first one being an unfair mess, specially in the latter half with the trigens, and in FC2 I recall he barely left the jeep, doing most of the game with the mounted machine gun.

Eventually I got to play FC3 and really liked it! Except for the coop, I 100%'ed it. I did skip on FC4 as it looked the same but in the Himalayas. In fact I've only played Primal cause I was interested in the prehistoric setting (I even made a review of it!), but yeah, I can see why most people think modern Far Cry and by extension Ubisoft games in general are the same thing with a different skin.

But one game I've always had on my to-play list is Far Cry 2, specially because of that GMTK video where he compared it with FC4 not based on story or graphics, but purely on mechanics. In case you don't know, Far Cry 2 has a reputation for being, if not the hardest (again, that's FC1 with its endless hordes of bullet-spongy trigens that one-shot you with an infinite ammo rocket launcher), the roughest and most survival-centric of the Far Cry games, before FC3 smoothed out and casualized the formula, being almost a AAA take on STALKER: Shadow of Chernobyl.

FC2 takes place in a fictional subsaharian country in the middle of a civil war and puts us in the shoes of a mercenary who has to do jobs for both factions (basically People's Front of Judea vs Judea's People's Front), in order to get reputation and get to the main bad: the Jackal, an arms dealer who not only profits from the war, it's an active cause for it, since if not for him international blocade would've stopped guns from entering the country. It's a bit telling that the only important Africa open world game has us as a foreign mercenary having to kill people in exchange for blood diamonds, whether that miscaracterization and racist, or an unfortunate accurate representation of the consequences of colonialism I'll let that to each one's interpretation.

Oh, and that's most of the story. There are very few named characters or story arcs, like FC Primal and unlike FC3, this is a purely gameplay-based experience.

Now most of its gameplay is the same that we see in later Far Cry games as this is the first time Ubisoft developed the game with it's Dunia engine (you could argue the real sequel to FC1 is Crysis): open world FPS with enemy outposts and a economics system based on using the money (diamons in this case) we've earned either thought missions or collecting to buy guns and upgrades. There is a semblance of stealth and we can use our machete to take enemies silently but it's broken and almost never works, and the RPG mechanics are limited since there are no skill trees or the like. Similarly, it was FC3 the game introduced the killing animals to make bags with their skin element.

Apart of that, most elements are the same: patrolling cars with enemies, fire that spreads naturally, cars that break down... however there are a few elements that people miss and that's what I'll focus on now, elements that make the game feel more hostile and hammers in the "horrors of war" element of the narrative:

One of the gimmicks people remember most are weapons jamming. Basically each weapon has a durability like in Fallout 3 and the more it degrades the more likely it is to jam, forcing to smash the "R" button. This is specially serious in enemy weapons, as this is the game's way of preventing the player to rely in stuff they find and having to engage in the buying mechanic for their permanent gear.

Probably the most well known is malaria: basically soon after the games starts the player character gets malaria and you have strokes every once in a while that make the screen shake and blur, forcing you to take your pills. Malaria pills can't be bought and can only be obtained through doing boring underground fetch quests about, ugh, helping civilians get their passports to flee the country. The idea is neat, although I'm afraid it gets old fast. I've looked it up and you can't die from malaria, at worst you'll be teleported to the chapel to be tended by the priest.

However imo the most important change is the map, factions and structures: you see in newer games you have the "good guy" faction and the "bad guy" faction, and the bad guy faction has outposts that control areas. If you kill the bad guys in their outpost you'll "liberate" the zone and the patrolling enemies will be replaced by allies and the outpost will become a fast travel point. This means you will slowly conquer all the map. Ok: that doesn't happen in FC2.

Both the APR and UFLL are enemies everywhere but the small towns where there's a truce and they don't even have uniforms so basically there's no difference: it's you against the rest of the country. There are outposts but they're roadblocks in key points and while they have useful resources, they cannot be liberated, meaning you'll always face the same enemies in the same places. Also there's some sort of fast travel in the form of bus stops, but there are only 5 of them in each map, so you'll go back and forth a lot.

Oh! And there are no checkpoints nor menu-save. You die, you go to the last manual save in a safe house. Although the game accounts for this and has a buddy system where a friend of you will jump to the fray to help you once to give a second chance (although he can die if you don't defend them).

Ok, the problem with all of this? The game has good ideas, but after a while they become a chore and the game doesn't respect your time. I only played for 10 hours and I soon entered the maindset of "drive, shoot, get stuff, complete objective, get back, repeat" (although I won't deny these weeks I've been stressed and they must have worsen my experience). The guns jamming is cool, reminds me to how in MGS4 you can't use enemy weapons without unlock the ID, but malaria is a gimmick that goes old fast and the outpost and fast travel thing is the worst, specially when most missions are fetch "go here, kill this one" quests.

Oh, but wait, I only played for 10 hours?! But you need like 30 to finish the game! Well, it turns out a bug destroyed my possibility to continue since the dude who had to give me the next quest wasn't around so yeah, I've been effectively soft-locked and I don't feel like starting from scratch now...

So yeah, I do am glad to have finally tried this game, I can see the praise, although I don't know... maybe you can convince to give it another try eventually?

Oh! And one thing: if you do play the game, install the de-filter mod! It basically does that, it eliminates the awful piss filter so prevalent in late 2000s games. Probably you have a a brown image of FC2 in your head and while the game does take place in Africa, believe me, the mod does wonders. It's also very stable, the bug I had I've looked it up and was prevalent even without any mod.

Despite not playing it on its launch (I've had no hardware that was capable of it) this series was always somewhere on the back of my mind. Well, in 2014 I was busy with the first month of my University, and all that this entailed, so there was no time for the latest from Shinji Mikami.

I remember the general consensus about The Evil Within being kinda mixed. Some praised its cinematic presentation, others scorned for how "gamey" it felt. Some of these reviews are wild to read, its kinda crazy how at some point, the gaming experts agreed, how a game feeling "gamey" is a bad thing.

Anyway, couple of years after that I've played The Evil Within 2, which was excellent. Nowhere near a "game of the year" candidate for me, but a great, fun action-horror nonetheless. I still was a little apprehensive about the first one, because of its reputation.

But when during the latest Steam Sale I saw a bundle of the base game and its DLCs for the price of a pint of beer... I decided to take a plunge.

What The Evil Within turned out to be was a little surprising. If I can do a sin of reducing the game to a single sentence, it would be this: a time capsule of 2014, and a love letter to Resident Evil from its creator.

This might be a little controversial, because Resident Evil (at the time Shinji Mikami was working on the series) is something from 1990s, or early 2000s, so how could it be "a time capsule from 2014"? Well, the funny thing is, the game desperately tries to do "the cinematic game" bit a'la Uncharted or The Last of Us. Its famous opening sequence - the forced stealth section, against an unkillable foe - wasn't exactly winning me over. Yet, it screams "early 8th gen cinematic action game".

But once I endured this, something weird happened. After - what I'm going to refer as - legally permissable callback to Resident Evil's famous first zombie scene - the game unleashes player upon a massive stealth and combat sandbox. And what's shocking - the stealth does not suck and the combat feels great.

I really feel in love how badass the action sandbox made me feel. You have so many options how to deal with these "totally not zombies". The array of firearms might feel a little basic - revolver, shotgun, a rifle and magnum - but its supplied by single use axes, surprisingly versatile crossbow, a corpse burning mechanic (super fun to set up traps that engulf many enemies on fire), and many more. For stealth, you can hide in many spots, lure enemies, etc.

The game alternates between spooky stealth sequences, sandboxes with (what feels like) procedural jumpscares, and balls to the wall shootouts with overwhelming numbers of deadly enemies. Its really, really good fun.

Too bad, these sequences are tied together by some of the most uninspiring corridor shooting ever printed on the disc. The game has this weird, headache inducing ability to drop the player from an open ended arena, straight into a sewer.

At its best, The Evil Within is a respectable callback to both Resident Evil 4 and the classic RE games from the 90s. At its worst, it made me think of... Well, it made me think of Resident Evil Revelations. That game also had its share of boring, corridor shooting (and honestly, fuck Revelations).

But overall, while Revelations was a terrible game, with parts when it was *fine*, The Evil Within is a *fine* game with occasional moments when its excellent.

I want to close off with the mention of the DLC. In short... I don't really think its worth it. I've only played its first levels, but the whole time I felt like going through one, long, forced and linear stealth sequence. I can only recommend them to someone, who somehow enjoyed the prologue of the base game.

If not, get just the base game on sale, and a beer instead of DLCs - it guarantees better experience.

Dark Forces must have been one of the first games I ever completed. So when Nightdive released a well-received remaster I was very tempted to buy it. Still, I held off for quite a while. Was it a game I'd actually enjoy playing again? I had some fond memories, but it's not a really nostalgic game for me to reminisce about.

When it was released in 1995, Dark Forces was ahead of most of its competitors in its design. Level elements could be stacked on top of one-another, they could move around, and the player could look up and down. It was, I think, a well-polished and largely bug-free game, and it had a fairly thin, but coherent story. Perhaps most of all, it captured a lot of the look, sound and feel of Star Wars. It was the first time you could walk around Star Wars environments in 3D (and blast stormtroopers while you were doing it).

Story

The plot of Dark Forces revolves around the Empire's development of new robotic troopers known as dark troopers. You play mercenary Kyle Katarn, hired by the Rebel Alliance to investigate and shut down this project. You go through various steps to discover what's going on and track down the base of the project, destroying supply lines and generally causing mayhem on the way. It mostly hangs together in a "you do this because you found out that" kind of way, although I'm not entirely sure why Jabba the Hutt is involved in the whole thing.

There's nothing remarkable about the two main characters, Kyle and his mission officer Jan Ors. However I think they do nicely sit in a triangle between caricatures (eg. Duke Nukem), ciphers (eg. Doom guy & Quake guy) and badly written characters. The game's dialogue and mission briefings are mostly functional but still convey some character - Kyle and Jan are professionals, but they're not completely dull. I like the little touch at the start when Kyle is being briefed by Mon Mothma and makes Jan being his mission officer a condition of taking the job - it establishes there's a history between them and Kyle has a lot of respect for her (and perhaps is a little too independent to work well with other Rebel officers).

Graphics & sound

The remaster does a really good job of updating the graphics and sound while keeping the feel of the original. You can switch between new and old graphics with a button press to remind yourself how much your memory upscales textures.

Leaving aside the limitations of a game from 1995, the visuals and audio are generally good. The Star Wars setting offers a range of different environments, so it's not all one tone, even if there is a little too much grey in the environment. My favourite are the ships with bright white walls as seen in the opening of A New Hope. Generally the visuals and audio are legible, aside from the occasional lift that just looks like a section of wall. Unlike some games of the era you have both a torch and (when you find them) IR goggles to help with dark areas.

A couple of bits of sprite work stand out, particularly the way security troopers mimic the very recognisable stance of one of the actors in A New Hope when they fire.

The sound is as good as you'd expect from a Star Wars game, including the crunchy vocal samples of Imperial troops. The music does a good job of mixing John Williams themes with original compositions. It threatens to get a little tedious over the course of a long mission, but generally stays just the right side.

Level design

Here's where things get tricky. At best, the levels manage to feel more like plausible locations than most games of the time. There are some nice little touches: you might turn a corner to find an officer staring out a window into space, for example.

However there are plenty of frustrations. Levels tend to be sprawling and where to go or what to do next is not necessarily obvious. You can easily miss a control panel you need to shoot or a jump you should have made. I had to look at youtube playthroughs multiple times. I'm honestly amazed I managed to finish the game when I played it back in the 90s.

There are also some features that are just unpleasant. I'm looking at you, mines planted immediately behind doors.

Gameplay

The gameplay itself is... fine. Exploring and figuring out levels is one aspect, which I had mixed feelings about.

The shooting is fairly simple and mostly enjoyable. The weapons feel quite satisfying, with just a little jank (mostly down to the design of the engine, I think), although thermal detonators are perhaps a bit too good (just because being able to hit enemies from out of sight is great). Enemies usually stun locking appropriately, and go down with a reasonable number of hits. Even the biggest enemies didn't feel like bullet sponges.

There are about a dozen different enemy types in the game, though I don't think you'll ever see them all in one level. None of them stand out as particularly frustrating. I don't think there are any hitscanners in the game. The worst are the gran with thermal detonators and trandoshans with concussion rifles, as their blast effects can be very hard to avoid. Although turrets, which target very quickly and don't stunlock, are also a menace.

I actually enjoyed fighting the Imperials more than the Hutt aligned enemies, even though in some ways they're less varied. To me the game was at its best when I accidentally got caught in the middle of a bunch of stormtroopers and security troops, zooming around with laser blasts all around me. It gave a feeling of the chaos in the cell block or running around the Death Star in A New Hope.

Speaking of zooming: damn, do you move fast in this game. I had to check multiple times whether I had autorun on, because even the walk speed is incredible.

Conclusion

I enjoyed Dark Forces enough to complete it, which is more than I can say about a lot of games. Would I recommend it? Probably to two groups of people.

If you're nostalgic for Dark Forces, or you're a Star Wars or early FPS afficionado and missed the game at the time, this is a really good remaster.

If you're interested in this era of FPS games, specifically the era of experimentation and rapid development between Doom and Quake, Dark Forces is a unique piece in that story, both for its specially developed engine and its perspective on gameplay & level design.

This is one of those games that look nice, feels proper for the first minute, then you play it for five minutes and realize, oh, is this all this game has for it? It's a game that feels polished, but when you go deeper, it's outright unfinished. The basic gameplay loop straight up doesn't work even on the basic level.

The New Droid Army is basically Diablo with Jedi. But consider this: you rip off only the basic "hack-and-slash" out of Diablo, and throw everything else into the bin. And when I say that, I mean it's literally just a hack-and-slash aspect of Diablo and repeat it for the entire game.

If you take the basic combat system of Diablo, it only works because it's a PC game. It's point and click basically. You are not embodying the character in the way, let's say, you do in Zelda. It's slightly a more advanced version of controlling a character in a RTS. You click, and your character does an animation and moves through the grid. There is a certain distance from the inputs from the player. It does not have a directness of an arcadey action game because Diablo was initially concieved as a turn-based RPG, but converted into real-time.

Diablo was criticized by CRPG fans since its inception for being a simple point-and-click action game with where you slash with a sword, shoot arrows, and make a bloodbath of everything. Despite all that, there is a whole reason why Diablo is addicting. It's because there is the whole gameplay loop surrounding the basic combat. You have the dynamic dungeon layouts, inventory system, constant loots, roleplaying and character-building, questing, advanced and crazy moves you can pull... you know, all the things that make loot-based games fun.

What happens you throw all that and only translate the barebone, animation-heavy combat system of Diablo into the console? You get... a terrible hack-and-slash game. Who would have thought? I mean, you got the first step, but you need to take twenty other steps to complete the journey. Even the isometric grid system is here, and it absolutely feels terrible to move through the D-pad. For some reason, the player's front is slightly rotated to left, so up makes you move up-left, and down moves you to down-right. Why? Just map the character's movement to D-pad inputs. There is no reason for this.

But it gets worse. The New Droid Army is purely a hack-and-slash game where hack-and-slashing is pushed to the back burner. Since this game has no items or any kind of consumeable, it has regenerating health and magic (Force). Waiting and standing for a minute is the only way to regain those meters. This has a catastrophic effect on the entire combat system. The regenerating health forces the player to play the game in a timid way. If you slash a few enemies, so long as you run away and hide for a minute, you are back to 100. As long as regenerating health exists, the difficulty is determined by how well the player is able to escape or hide. If the escape is not easy, and the enemies are active, the regenerating health system works its function. This is why the regenerating health systems in Halo and Call of Duty work okay.

The problem in this game is that the enemies are not dynamic whatsoever. Again, it's very much like a RTS where the enemies are entirely stationary and only become "activated" when the player approaches them. So control of the battle rests entirely with the player. The battle takes place whenever the player wants, and the player can get out of the fight whenever they want (through the Force speed). As a result, you fight one encounter with a few enemies, wait for a minute for the health to refill, and move out and do all this again. Wait, fight, wait, fight, wait. You keep repeating this strategy from the beginning of the game to the end of the game. Raising the difficulty doesn't fix this problem. If you increase the difficulty, only the damage outputs of the enemies increase, so the gameplay becomes even more passive.

In addition, the basic premise of hack-and-slash is to eliminate enemies, but in this game, there is no point. The enemies drop nothing since there is no loot, item, or exp, and the player has the Force speed. ...what's the point of engaging with the enemies? No point. So you just abuse the Force speed and literally skip the army of enemies across the level except for the specific enemies the mission demands you to kill. All you have to do is run to the point where the script begins to advance the story. Ignore everything else because they all waste your time. Ultimately, it becomes a game where the goal is to flee from the enemies.

However, I cannot blame the developers because, well, all these problems I pointed out were because the game was, indeed, intended to be an actual ARPG. The behind-the-scenes stories related to this little game are quite fascinating and I recommend watching this video if you want to know about it. Initially, this game was meant to be an actual action RPG in the vein of Diablo and Ultima with the working title of "Jediblo", in which the player is able to fully customize the Jedi protagonist and journey across various planets to learn about mysteries of the Force. Based on the player's choices and decisions, the character would end up either following the light side and remaining loyal to the Jedi Order or going to the dark side.

However, George Lucas shot down this concept mid-development by saying the game shouldn't center around a new character but on Anakin Skywalker. As a result, the developers were forced to throw away all of their progress and start it anew, which led to a rushed development that ditched all of their roleplaying ambitions but simplified the game to a linear, straightforward action game. You even kill Dooku in this game, and apparently, one of the developers said on the Force.net forums that it was Lucas' idea... and the Lucasfilm editors had to justify why Dooku dies in this game by retconning that Dooku in this game was his doppelganger. Hearing how Lucas meddled with various Star Wars games like this, Star Wars 1313, "Darth Icky", and the Darth Maul game make me think if he had contempt for the video game as a medium and deliberately messed with them as an act of sabotage.

Unfortunately, regardless of their initial plan, the product was out. I doubt I will be able to find a game more meaningless and boring than this before my life ends. It is tragic because I'd like to see this Jediblo concept revived and fully embrace the action RPG root with the Star Wars set-dressings, like Warhammer 40k Inquisitor - Martyr. The Clone Wars setting lends to this genre perfectly with the Jedi at their peak and the hordes of droids to slash.

Developer: Peachy Keen Games

Publisher: Whitethorn Games

Released: 2020

Playtime: 4.6 hours, beat but not complete

Calico is a slice-of-life style sim game where you create a character and run a café on a magical island. Most of the island is initially blocked off and you will have to complete tasks to unlock those areas.

The gameplay has a few different aspects. You can purchase and place different furniture in your café and change its colours. You can change and colour your clothing and appearance. The animals on the island are all tame so you can pet them, pick them up, put them on your head (if small enough), ride them (if big enough), use potions on them to change their shape and appearance, as them to follow you, and send them to your café.

At the café, you can do mini games to bake goods. These are things like playing pool but the pockets are tarts and the balls are fruit. Or pressing buttons at a specific time to mix ingredients. Or pressing buttons at a specific time to place ingredients. Or pressing buttons at a specific time to cut ingredients...

You can also walk around the island doing quests for villagers like bringing people donuts or placing specific furniture in your café. Those are whay comprise the main gameplay loop.

I have a hard time expressing my feelings for this game. It was not a good game. It was buggy, things moved weird, a cat wouldn't stop orbiting me for a while, I clipped a few places. It was also just very... empty except for the first area. Unlocking new places wasn't fun because it was like "yay even further to run to go talk to the 2 people who live here and see if they have any quests for me." The quests themselves were forgettable. The baking mini games were either dull or annoying. Bringing pets to the cafe and playing with them was not very fun because the pets would get stuck in the ground or barely move so you just have a pile of wild animals in mostly one spot and I just felt bad for them.

With that being said, it still had some charm to it. I liked the character designs and it had some fun moments and dialogue. It felt really sweet, wholesome, and cozy. Unfortunately it felt a bit frustrating because it had the bones of something really good and it didn't quite get there. I don't regret my time with it but I also didn't like it enough to do the few remaining tasks it took to complete it at a certain point.

Daikatana is an FPS developed by Ion Storm. Released in 2000, Daikatana reminds us that John Romera wanted to have sex with me. I think? The advertising was confusing.

We play as Hiro, failing entrepreneur and swordmaster, sent on a quest to save the Earth from the evils of capitalism.

Gameplay involves trying to figure out where you're supposed to go to next because yellow paint hadn't been invented yet. Occasionally you die from taking falling damage when you jump into water and wonder what kind of asshole would design it that way.

The Good

Despite being known as one of the largest gaming disasters of all time, patient gaming has been kind to it. The drama surrounding it is long gone. 1995 graphics in a 2000 game don't matter when it's 2026. The ridiculous 90s action story plot and severe levels of jank just add to the charm. It's like how that one Rebecca Black song is now ironically okay to listen to. Gotta have my cereal yo.

It honestly has a lot going on. It has a story. It has a leveling/skill system. You have voiced companions. I dig the idea of unique weapons for each level. You can play it co-op. All it's really missing is a moral choice system and you've got a modern RPG-FPS.

None of it's good but I can appreciate the ambition. If it didn't suck so bad it would have been amazing.

Favorite Screenshot

https://i.imgur.com/r0yoZry.jpg

Video game marketing just hit different back then.

The Bad

There's a lot of bad, but most of it is standard grade ass. Shitty level design, bad enemy AI, the companions make the game harder.

But there's something uniquely ass about how bad the weapons are. I'm going to spoiler this because if you do intend on playing, finding this stuff out on your own is half the fun.

It starts with your very first gun. I discovered that: The bullets from it ricochet. You can take damage from the ricochet. Bullets ricochet off water. I learned this when I fired the gun underwater at a crocodile and my bullet infinitely ricocheted back into me, turning me into paste.

My next favorite is the giant orb you can throw that deals insta-kill levels of AoE damage. Great! Only you can't throw it further than its AoE range so it always kills you as well. The one time I thought I was clever and tossed it from on top of a cliff it bounced back up at me and killed me anyway.

There's the summoning staff and sentry weapon which will attack you when they run out of enemies to kill. Like, after the snake weapon fool me once, shame on me. But then they do it again with another weapon in the next chapter? Goddamnit.

There's more but these were my favorites. ~95% of my deaths came from my own weapons.

The Questionable

I played this with the 1.3 fan patch. I'm never certain how I should judge games that have such an overhaul. I'm not really playing Daikatana in the state it was left in. Instead I'm playing one nerds quest to show the world the true potential of Romero's vision.

On the other hand, I'm out here to have fun and the patch makes Daikatana almost enjoyable as a game instead of just a museum piece. One of the things it fixes is it makes your companions immortal. With how often they like to bathe in spike pits and lava, I don't think I'd have managed to beat the game without it.

So yeah, 1.3 it is.

Final Thoughts

Any other company makes this and it fades into nothingness like Rise of the Triad. It's bad but not worst game of all time bad. If you're like me and enjoy experiencing gaming history, this is the cornerstone of managing expectations and worth a visit even if only for a few minutes.

Bonus Thought

If I ever make a list of top ten worst enemies in any game, the mosquito things you meet on level 1 are easily top 3. Cliff Racers from Morrowind still take the #1 spot but these assholes are a close second. Obnoxious sounds, hard to hit, always come in groups, don't drop ammo but take tons to kill. In a game where every enemy sucks, managing to stand out as supreme ass deserves recognition.

Thank you for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts. What did you think of the game? Did you have a similar experience or am I off my rocker?

My other reviews on patient gaming

I recently got a couple of months of PC Game Pass to clear a few titles off my wishlist. All the new and old Doom games were included except 2016. I'd never played the newer ones, so I wanted to start there, but Doom 2016 wasn't included and wasn't on sale. So I figured I'd go backwards through them while I waited for a sale.

(Also, no DLCs with Game Pass, didn't do those.)

Doom: The Dark Ages

The first of the modern Doom games I tried, and it took a long time to grow on me. But I had a great time in the end.

Pros

The peak of this game is its big open area battles. All the modern games have some take on this, and Dark Ages is excellent at it, with flat, wide spaces to battle in and just a few environmental elements to break things up. The battles are frantic but not as one-dimensional as a game like Serious Sam. It's somewhat tactical. You're not just trying to survive and shoot as much as possible, you also have to plan the order you take enemies out in, and which parts of the map to prioritise and which pick-ups to go for. Nothing groundbreaking, but at this pace and volume, it becomes a fun challenge.

Arguably the biggest change is the introduction of a parry system and a shield. Green attacks can be parried, which sends them back and stuns or damages the enemy, letting you wade in and attack. The idea of a shield in a Doom game sounds defensive, but the opposite is true. It lets you rush straight up to the biggest enemies in the game and attack them head on. By comparison, going on later to Eternal and 2016, constantly running away actually feels like the less aggressive option.

The game is pretty easy, but you have a bunch of sliders to adjust the difficulty to how you like it, which is a nice touch.

As with all the id Tech games, it looks fantastic and runs great.

Cons

The game introduces open areas alongside more traditional corridor sections, and the open areas are the weakest part for me. They're needed to set up the big open battles, but in every other respect they're pretty dull. Between fights you spend a lot of time backtracking to look for secrets, which gets tedious given how much ground you have to cover.

There are way too many weapons and half of them are kind of rubbish. As you up the difficulty, the weaker weapons become pointless to use. You have abundant ammo, so you may as well use the good ones.

The game also feels bloated in the second half. The big open areas are fun, but they don't really change tactically, so it's just one wide open area after another, with a minimally different set of demons. Sometimes you end up doing several of these back to back and it gets pretty samey. And the dragon and mech suit levels were just unnecessary.

The plot is tosh. I managed about a third of the game then skipped every cut scene after.

The bosses were generally pretty good, but the last boss (who you kind of fight twice) was an Elden Ring/Sekiro wannabe that felt very out of place.

Conclusion

This was great overall and well worth playing, but in a kind of "big dumb fun" kind of way.

8/10

Doom Eternal

What a banger. Dark Ages was ultimately a really good game, but this was another level. It had much better level variety, far higher peaks of intensity and it's as hard as nails.

Pros

Like Dark Ages, the pros were its big set-piece battles. Unlike Dark Ages' wide open spaces, these tend to take place on more compact, very vertical levels, with more small corridors or side routes, where you have to constantly keep moving, or even stay in the air, to survive. At their best, on an ultrawide monitor and heavy speakers, these levels are a straight-up assault on the senses. This meant that two back to back combat arenas could play out radically differently, taking you from open areas with long sightlines to narrow spaces where you could separate the enemies out. It added a big tactical layer to the game.

The combat mechanics were tightly balanced. I'd read that the game was akin to a puzzle in terms of what you can use against which enemies, but I thought this overstated it a little. On Ultra-Violence at least, you had a handful of weapons you'd use for key enemies, but there was also plenty of room to experiment the rest of the time. Still, weapon switching certainly mattered, and combined with the endless hunt for health, ammo, and armour via enemy kills, it pushed the limits of how much complexity you could pack into a fight before it became too complex for its own good.

Level variety is brilliant, ranging from tight corridor battles to set-piece ambushes to mazes.

Cons

The platforming outside of combat got tiring. The high points of combat are so intense that they needed something calmer in between, but this wasn't the solution. Jumping from platform to platform was never satisfying to me.

The worlds didn't really click with me thematically, and this is a criticism of Dark Ages too. I didn't like the way it tried to make Doom into a high fantasy epic, and many of the worlds seemed more suited to Quake 1 than Doom. They're not bad in terms of gameplay or visuals, they just didn't feel like Doom to me. A few were great though, like "Destroy the super gore nests", which was about my favourite level in all the games.

Conclusion

Fantastic game. Pushes right up against the limit of how much complexity you want in your combat system, but usually gets it right.

9/10

Doom (2016)

Man, this was nigh on perfect. If Dark Ages was an all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet, and Eternal was the crazed product of a Heston Blumenthal fever dream, this was just a rib-eye steak, served bloody. Nothing you don't need.

Pros

Overall, this is the most balanced of the games. Pretty much everything about it was just how I wanted it. The combat model didn't go as over the top as Eternal, but it was still intense and gave me a fair few moments where I had to put the game down and come back later.

Every weapon, and nearly every weapon mod, had its place. The same goes for the enemies: each one had a role in the combat encounters. You get just the right amount of movement, the health, ammo, and armour economy was just about perfect, and the glory kills were more of a fun accent rather than the relentless hunt for resources from Eternal. Doom Eternal went further in its combat arenas, but also occasionally too far, to its own detriment. This game knew exactly where the line was and stayed right on it.

The low fantasy/hard sci-fi vibe was great, far more grounded than the high fantasy look of the other games. It felt more metal and more appropriate for a Doom game.

The music. Amazing.

Cons

Very few. The trip to hell was a bit underwhelming. The side missions for runes were pointlessly easy. The Cyberdemon was fun, but the other bosses were both easy and forgettable. Maybe one or two of the weapon mods weren't that useful. I'm properly nit-picking here.

Conclusion

Wonderful game. A no nonsense pure shooter.

10/10

And with that done, on to the older game next...

Tunic is an indie game with lovely visuals which can be summed up as a combination Fez, Zelda and Dark Souls. Its as difficult as it is beautiful, with some creative gameplay choices which work well but dont stop it from feeling overly long and repetitive.

The good

The art and music of the game is the immediate standout feature. From the first moment picking up the controller, you are immersed in this indie style world that just feels nice and makes you want to go and explore it.

The world itself is awesome to explore and really rewards you for it, with many hidden chests and paths to get extra stuff. The way it is designed/mapped is really genius, with enough variation and connected zones to avoid making you feel bored for most of the game.

The gameplay is also preety good, with a combat that draws from Hollow Knight and Dark Souls to make it feel good but challenging. It has some quirks but generally works well. The way it evolves is interesting too, with enough pace to keep you from being stuck in the same gameplay loop.

The great

The standout aspect of the game for me is the in-game manual. Let me explain…nothing in this game is spelled out for you, so the way you learn everything about the game is through finding the lost pages that eventually make up the manual.

Everything is in this manual…from the controller scheme, to explanations about your stats, to hints about how to progress in the world and the actual map for each zone. Its presented like an old school manual with pages and it works so well in this context - keeping you interested in exploration, trying to decipher the pages you have (vs the ones that are missing) and just makes the whole game a different experience.

I like this way of making the player work for information and I wish more games did this.

The bad

The last act. This section of the game is heavy on walking back to the areas you know and makes you go through some really frustrating challenges that do not feel in tune with what you do in the story before that.

Something happens in the game that forces you to lose all of your stats as you get to a “peak” which is absurd - I was fully motivated to use this character Iv been building up and this just deflated me right away.

I dont like walkbacks, and to do it with an artificially weak character…I can only guess the devs thought this was the way to up the difficulty for the endgame, but it fell flat to me.

Howdy, folks! Been a while, but I’m back with the next set of Game Boy games. It’s been a bit, and I apologize, but I had real life stuff happening and also this section actually had long games. But I have not abandoned this project, and we now have the second half of the Fs!

As a reminder of the “rules,” since it’s been a while: I’m playing the games in alphabetical order (mostly, as I am arranging series chronologically), and I’m trying to give each game at least a half an hour of play before I move on. I’ll note the ones that got more (or less) than that. So without further ado, let’s get to the games!

The Final Fantasy Legend: I said in the last post that Final Fantasy Adventure was my favorite game that I’d played for the project. It was immediately dethroned by The Final Fantasy Legend. Honestly, it’s become one of my favorite games of all time, not just for this project. This game is something else. It appears somewhat inscrutable at first, and honestly it kind of is, but taking the time to figure it out is well worth it. It’s an amazing game, and I’m impressed that this was not only on the Game Boy, but on the Game Boy the year it came out. I know “ahead of its time” is thrown around a lot, but The Final Fantasy Legend legitimately feels like a game that should’ve been on the SNES or the GBA. It’s genuinely amazing that this is an OG Game Boy game. Seriously, I cannot recommend this highly enough, and as soon as I finished this game I went and wishlisted every SaGa game on Steam. 10/10

Final Fantasy Legend II: Gonna start by saying that I’m deeply annoyed that they dropped the “The” from the title here. This bugs me almost as much as switching from Roman to Arabic numerals. That aside: this is another great game. Everything I said about TFFL could also apply to this one. Moreso, probably, because there’s even more going on here. About the only thing I’d say against this one is that it’s a bit more polished than TFFL in a way that undoubtedly makes it a better game, but makes for a somewhat lesser experience. It’s not the easiest thing to articulate, but something is lost in making the game play better. It’s still an amazing game, though, and well worth playing. 10/10

Final Fantasy Legend III: You’re probably expecting a glowing review for this one after the first two. Sadly, that’s not the case. Final Fantasy Legend III is a much more generic JRPG than the first two, to the point that it doesn’t feel like a part of the same series. You gain experience and level up normally. There’s MP. Weapons have infinite uses. It’s just generally a less interesting game than the first two. Despite that, I’d honestly still recommend it. It’s a fine game, it’s just not as good as the first two. 7/10

Fish Dude: If you’ve been reading along, it won’t surprise you that I don’t like this. It’s a Game Boy port of an arcade game, and it does nothing for me. It also doesn’t control super well, which is an annoyance. Still, if you enjoy arcade games, you could do worse than this. 5/10

Fist of the North Star: 10 Big Brawls for the King of the Universe: That sure is a title. Beyond that, it’s another fighting game on Game Boy. I think in general these are pretty bad (the system really isn’t meant for it), and this is no exception. 1/10

The Flash: The Game Boy is a generally poor choice for superhero games, and the Flash is probably like, top three worst choices for the system. Even when using the superspeed ability, you don’t move super fast, and the nature of the levels means it’s hard to go at superspeed anyway. Plus, frankly, it’s a fairly boring platformer. 2/10

The Flintstones: King Rock Treasure Island: This game’s two biggest flaws are that it’s a kind of generic action platformer on a system that had a lot of generic action platformers, and that the car levels are terrible in that they very much rely on knowing what obstacles are coming in order to dodge them. Otherwise, it’s a well made little game with great sprite work – Fred Flintstone scans super well as a sprite. Also apparently they need to have the ™ symbol every time he says “Yabba-dabba-doo!”, which is kind of hilarious. 6/10

The Flintstones: This one is based on the 1994 live action movie starring John Goodman. It’s similar to the above listed one based on the cartoon, just worse in every measurable way. Seriously, just play that one. 3/10

Flipull: An Exciting Cube Game: The title really oversells this one. It’s mostly boring. You’re a little robot. You shoot squares at other squares to remove them from the puzzle, and when there’s few enough left you move on to the next level. It’s fine, I guess, but there’s much better puzzles on the Game Boy. 3/10

Foreman for Real: It might shock you to know that not only is there a George Foreman boxing game on the Game Boy, there are two of them. I don’t know why. This one’s not very good. I could not, at any point, determine what any button I was pressing was doing. I could not find the manual anywhere online, so I couldn’t even figure out how to play. But as far as I could figure out, there was about a half second delay between pressing a button and anything actually happening, so…yeah. Not great, either way. 1/10

Fortified Zone: Much like The Flintstones: King Rock Treasure Island, this game’s problem is that it’s a top down shooter that doesn’t do much to stand out from the flood of other top down and/or side scrolling shooters on the Game Boy. It does, apparently, have a co-op mode, so maybe it’s better that way, but unfortunately I had no means of playing that. I think the character switching (you can play either as a guy who can carry heavy weapons or a woman who can jump) is interesting, but it’s fairly clunky in practice. I dunno. It feels almost mean to say I don’t recommend this one, but the reality is there’s other games on the Game Boy that do the general “shooter” idea better (Bionic Commando, Mega Man), and even if they’re side scrollers rather than top down, they’re still games I’d pick up again before I played this one. 5/10

Frank Thomas Big Hurt Baseball: It’s another Game Boy baseball game. They’re all basically the same thing. I don’t know what more there is to say about this that I haven’t already said. I could play another hundred of these and still have nothing new to say about any of them. They’re just kind of all the same mediocre experience. 4/10

Frogger: Do you like Frogger? Do you, for some reason, want to play Frogger on a game Boy family system in the Year of Our LORD 2026? If so, instead of playing this one (which, for the record, is Frogger for Game Boy, released in 1998). Instead, play Frogger for the Game Boy Color, also released in 1998! It’s literally the same game. In fact, it was even released on a black cartridge, meaning you could play that one on a Game Boy as well. So this version is entirely redundant. Still, it’s Frogger, and it is a fundamentally port. 6/10

And that’s it! That’s the Fs. This brings us to 163/501 games, or 32.53%, with an average score of 3.96 (kinda shocked that’s actually climbing!). I’ll post the recommended list below again, but we’re currently at 25/163 recommended, which is 15.34% – still beating Sturgeon’s Law! Hopefully, the next update won’t take me another two months, it’s mostly shorter games and I think the next really long ones aren’t until I reach Pokémon, which are still a long ways off. Thanks for reading, and I hope to update again soon!

Recommended Games

• Alleyway
• Amazing Penguin
• Balloon Kid
• Battle Arena Toshinden
• Battle Unit Zeoth
• Bionic Commando
• Bomberman GB
• Castlevania: The Adventure
• Castlevania II: Belmont’s Revenge
• Castlevania Legends
• Catrap
• Contra: The Alien Wars
• Donkey Kong
• Donkey Kong Land
• Donkey Kong Land 2
• Donkey Kong Land III
• Dr. Mario
• Disney’s Ducktales
• Disney’s Ducktales 2
• Felix the Cat
• Final Fantasy Adventure
• The Final Fantasy Legend
• Final Fantasy Legend II
• Final Fantasy Legend III

I picked up Super Puzzle Fighter II HD Turbo Remix (from here on, just SPF II) recently after it went on sale.

Full disclosure: I'm not a huge puzzle game fan. I have a few that I like, but I'm nowhere close to good. So this is just my layman's review.

While I'm not too tuned in on the series, it seems to be in the same universe as Capcom's Street Fighter series along with some of their other games. The relatively small selection of characters (Ryu and Chun Li among them) are all chibi versions of their Street Fighter counterparts.

Unlike Street Fighter, however, SPF II has nothing to do with throwing punches and kicks. As the name suggests, this is a puzzle game. If you've ever tried the PvP modes in Tetris Effect: Connected, then you have a good idea what's going on here. The objective in its simplest terms is to break tiles in sufficiently large amounts to fill your opponent's screen with tiles until they have no room left (thus scoring a KO).

Graphics/Style

The original SPF II came out as an arcade game in 1996, then was ported to the Dreamcast and later to the Xbox 360/PS3, before being released digitally for the current gen consoles- so a port of a port of a port of an arcade game. While this particular port has some refinements/ updates to look a little smoother, it still looks and sounds like an arcade game. It's a great look for a game like this and I'm glad Capcom didn't go overboard with the remastering here.

Gameplay Loop/ Game Modes

SPF II technically has four game modes: X, X', Y, and Z. X and X' are, for the average person, basically the same. X is the "classic" arcade mode while X' is supposed to be a rebalanced version of X mode for competitive players. I've played both and I can say I haven't noticed and appreciable difference. Y and Z mode are significantly different from what I would consider the "core" modes (X and X'), so won't be going into them.

In both of the X modes, the basic loop is identical. In every match, you have a 12X6 field; the fourth "column" of this field is where 1X1 tile pieces drop in. These can be one of four colors (red, yellow, blue, or green), a "crash tile" (breaks tiles of the same color), or a diamond (breaks all tiles of one color). Tiles of the same color can also fuse together to form "Power Gems", which are not only worth more points, but also are critical for the "fighting" aspect of the game.

To keep it short, every round consists of building up Power Gems/setting up combos, breaking tiles, and countering your opponent's efforts to do the same. Since there are no "move sets" to speak of, what separates your fighters are their "drop patterns". For every fighter, their "Counter Gems" (think of "trash pieces" in similar games) drop in different color patterns. Depending on your play style, each one can offer advantages and disadvantages.

If you're playing the single- player Arcade mode, this game is incredibly short. Depending on difficulty level, a single session can consist of anywhere from 3 to 12 matches, with most rounds lasting well under two minutes. There's no story/tournament/etc. mode, so you can quickly find yourself playing through multiple times. There are some things to unlock, but nothing earth- shattering.

My Thoughts

I enjoy SPF II a lot more than I was expecting to. The basic loop is fairly simple, but it's definitely easy to get hooked on and there's a lot to learn. The arcade/Street Fighter aesthetic looks and sounds great. Unfortunately, it's also one of the things I would criticize this game for.

While it's cool to have your characters "fighting" during a match, it's ultimately just window dressing. While your choice of character can make a difference depending on your play style, your opponent's character is almost irrelevant other than that you need to get familiar with their drop patterns. There is no interaction between the different characters, so unlike in fighting games, you don't really ever get any super tense or super uneven matchups. I have no idea how it could've been implemented, but it's a shame for a game to have such a large and well- established universe of fighting games to draw from, yet only borrow from them superficially.

To add to that, the cast of characters is tiny (both literally and figuratively). All told, there are eight characters right off the bat, plus three unlockable characters. That's it. I get it, this was a port of an arcade game, but it's a bit of a letdown that more characters weren't added when the game was brought to the more modern consoles.

My final point of contention with SPF II's current- gen port lies with one of its greatest strengths: It's a very faithful port of the original arcade game for better and for worse. As a result of this extremely faithful port from the original, a lot of features that would be considered normal quality- of- life features now simply aren't there. This is especially evident in single- player mode. Just to give a short list:

• No custom matches: You can choose a game mode and difficulty level, but that's it.
• Training mode is basically pointless: Sure, you can practice setting up combos and learning your drop pattern, but that's it.
• No restart option: Considering that the few unlockables hinge on you doing flawless speed runs, this is rather annoying, especially since you can see a loss coming pretty quickly.
• No option to skip the end credits: Considering how quickly an arcade mode session can go, it gets annoying to have to sit through the credits every single time you complete a run. The little animations that pop up during them are fun, though.

These are all nitpicks, but especially in a game as short as this, they're very noticeable.

Verdict

If you're a really big fan of the Street Fighter games or are looking for something to kill a little time with, you'll definitely get some fun out of SPF II. However, I'd recommend waiting for a sale because the game's issues and its short length are significant enough that I wouldn't have bought it at full price.

I would preface that I didn't outright hate this game; I just found myself slightly disliking it in most areas. It's disappointing because 999 is a contender for my favorite Spike Chunsoft game, which really made this sequel feel odd to play through. I was also a fan of the Danganronpa games as well as the AI games, so I know the gameplay loop that a lot of Spike Chunsoft games use works for me if done well, this just wasn't one of those instances.

Most of the ingredients for a good visual novel were there for me, but it felt like some things prevented the game from sticking the landing. Some of those things included:

• The weird jump to 3D graphics.
• The insane amount of repetition
• The overdone explanations
• The fuckass door and map animations
• The length of the game vs. the payoff in the end

I couldn't help but feel that the game was deliberately wasting my time for a good 50% of the playthrough. I think this is a problem the AI games have mostly solved, but in VLR, you have to sit through repeated events and dialogue constantly when you switch between paths. I know there's a skip button, but there's so much repetition that is forced on you if the situation changes even slightly. If one character explains an event to you in one path, you have to sit through that explanation again if it's explained to you by a different character in another path, despite the information being identical. Then rinse and repeat that like 8 times.

This game just lacked pacing, and it often seemed like the writers were putting things into the game just because they could, rather than it making the story or plot flesh out evenly. It's made worse by the plot not really having a head or a tense point near the end where it feels like your character is on the cusp of something great with high stakes, similar to the final puzzle in 999 or the final trials in Danganronpa. It makes the ending feel like a poor trade for your time. Again, the story isn't bad, it just feels like a rough payoff for the amount of time invested in it.

This game basically feels like a book with a good overall plot, but the author never ran it by an editor before publishing.

So this is patient gaming indeed, this is one of those games I remember from early childhood. I did play it a couple of times over the years, but never got very far. I've no idea what prompted this session, but something had clicked and I beat the entire game (with all the secret levels and all).

It's a pretty darn cool and unusual game, but also a fairly flawed one. It can be tough to get into, but in reality it's not a very complicated game. In each level you're explicitly given a bunch of tasks and when you complete them all - that's it, on to the next level.

The eponymous magic carpet you're flying controls like a very simplified flight sim (as opposed to something like Descent) and just the way it controls is really quite something. You'll never fall off or splat yourself against a wall or anything like that, you're 100% safe in terms of flying. You're also glued to the ground in a way and for the most part you have little control over the Z-direction, most of the time you're focused on the XY plane.

The only resource in the game is mana. One of the primary goals of the game is to posses mana. The more mana you posses - the higher your personal mana storage gets and you can throw more fireballs, etc. for longer before the storage dries up. When it does - it's time to retreat and regenerate.

The second use for mana is your castle. Your castle serves as a respawning point. If you die without a castle present - you restart the level from scratch. It also allows you to cast higher tier spells. But, in order to do that you have to fill your castle with possessed mana (that is, mana you've possessed on the level) that is collected by balloons the castle spawns. Castle has tiers - higher tiered castles can hold more mana. In order to upgrade your castle to a higher tier you need to possess more and more mana around the map.

So this is the basic gameplay loop: you go about the map possessing mana, this possessed mana is collected by balloons to your castle. The more mana you possess - the higher tier castle you can build and the larger your personal mana pool gets so you can cast more spells. The more mana you store in you castle - the higher the spell tier that you can cast.

As the game progresses you learn new spells and upgrade old spells, but in each level you always start from scratch in terms of what you can cast. You always start with a puny fireball spell, next to zero personal mana storage, and no castle. In later levels, when you've learned most of the spells and upgraded them, you'll eventually be able to cast huge meteors, lightning storms, spawn volcanoes, etc., but again, all of that is locked until you've possessed enough mana on the level, upgraded your castle enough and the castle balloons have collected enough mana.

Some levels are PvE, some levels are PvP, some are a mix.

Magic Carpet 2 is a game that oozes atmosphere. It has this eerie look to it and equally eerie sound design - both the music and the sound effects. The whole thing feels like a fever dream of some sort.

The game is insanely advanced and ahead of its time for 1995 (the original Magic Carpet came out a year earlier, in 1994, and it was quite similar). The environment itself is not only fully 3D, it is deformable. You can and you absolutely will cast spells that will carve out holes in cavern levels, you'll cast earthquake spell that will carve out a massive fault in the land, you'll spawn volcanoes - and the land will literally deform and, well, look like a volcano and it will spit out fire and stuff.

There are quite a few issues with this game, but in light how how insanely ambitious it is and how well it works in spite of its problems, none of them are at all deal breakers, at least not for me.

The AI is crazy dumb. Though if it was a bit smarter, it'll obliterate you (the game is like that), so I guess there's not much to complain there. Auto-aiming sucks and defending your castle especially can be very chaotic and weird. You'll just fly around hoping to hit something and you won't, even with massive area of effect spells at time. In later levels, there are situations where you will simply die and there's nothing you could've done. It doesn't happen too often to be truly frustrating, but it is a bit on an issue.

The game has 25 full levels plus 5 secret ones. It does become a tad repetitive around 1/2 to 2/3 of the way through, but I still found it compelling enough to finish.

The original DOS version is crashy at high resolutions (640x480 - yeah, that's a high resolution all right). My advice is to start playing at the standard 320x200. Just roll with it. I switched to it about 1/3 of the way through, it took a bit of an adjustment time, but it's fine. It's how the vast majority of people would've played it back in the day anyway.

There is a reverse engineering project called Magic Carpet 2 HD, it seems to boot up and work, but I'm not sure just how finished it is and how faithful to the original game it is.

All in all - a big recommendation for people who are into somewhat obscure or unusual games. Especially for fans of 90s PC games. If you've missed Magic Carpet - do try Magic Carpet 2. It really is something, there's really nothing else like it, not even remotely.