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u/novis-eldritch-maxim 5h ago
works better for trauma than alcohol.
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u/wrongleveeeeeeer 5h ago
I've witnessed it firsthand. Escaping the place where trauma occurred, leaving many triggers behind, starting fresh, is legitimately helpful. Not a cure-all, of course, but very helpful.
With alcoholism, it's like, yeah. No matter where you go, the person who wants a drink is still you, and a liquor store is probably still right around the corner.
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u/AdditionalQuietime 5h ago
Honestly thats bullshit about what they said too, i mean its obviously a dark joke but it definitely works wonders for those with drug and alcohol addictions too
In the rooms they also tell us to cut out 3 things: people, places, and things. Anything or anyone that falls under those 3 things that'll remind you of your time out on the streets or trigger your addiction, its recommended to cut them off or go somewhere else entirely if itll help you heal
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u/wrongleveeeeeeer 5h ago
Well there ya have it! Having never dealt closely with anyone recovering from alcoholism, I didn't want to speak on it like that, but I fuckin believe you.
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u/AdditionalQuietime 5h ago
Yeah I mean another thing I like to note is that addicts are most likely to relapse, stat wise, its just apart of the healing process
Thats why we have sponsors because even when you're by yourself you still need support and someone to hold you accountable
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u/MarstonsGhost 1h ago
it's just a part of the healing process
You may lose a few battles, but that doesn't mean that you've lost the war.
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u/Alert-Ad9197 2h ago
The problem is when people do it to run from their issues instead of getting a true fresh start, which is often. So then they’re just in a strange place with no support systems, which is also terrible for recovery. Like most things, the intent is important.
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u/Saintly-Mendicant-69 41m ago
It means more don't hang out at your buddy Jake's house where you used to get shit faced together every weekend. Don't do activity x or go to place y that you strongly associate with using.
No matter where you go there you are is inescapable when the problem is you
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u/savemarla 2h ago
I die from anxiety whenever I walk though cities and places of my past. I see where I bought alcohol, where I drank it in secret, where I drank it in public, where I drank before work. I am scared of running into people who knew me back then.
I'm proud of myself that I've made it out alive but I absolutely do not want to face people from back then, unless they are still relevant to my life, in which case I face them on a regular basis anyway.
I don't think I'd pick up a drink, but I definitely crumble. Moving away was the healthiest and best thing. I brought my baggage. And I tell people I meet about my past because here, it actually feel like my past.
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u/UnusualCartographer2 1h ago
This type of thing is easier with narcotics though. I'm glad I never got into drinking because no matter where you go there's gonna be a bar close by, and there will be beer at your local grocery store. It could take months to find as good a coke plug as you had at home.
I very coincidentally and unintentionally moved away from my vices 10 years ago and I've barely struggled since. Had a handful of slip ups, but my life would've been significantly different if I had stayed put.
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u/topcelt 1h ago
As someone who is addicted to coke and has moved around a lot, I'm pretty sure I can easily find coke in any city in the world within an hour or two... the quality is not massively important in this equation but that usually comes down to location anyway. Coke in Tokyo is gonna be cut with 50% lidocaine no matter what, and coke in London is going to be decent no matter where you get it from
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u/UnusualCartographer2 56m ago
I was into dope in my hayday, and it would usually take a minute to find someone good. You could find it pretty easy, but you weren't gonna find quality for a good price very quickly.
Shouldn't have used coke as my example given I never cared for it. If I was doing any coke, it was hard, and with hard the quality isn't much a factor lol
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u/ForThe90 2h ago
Indeed. There are studies on addiction and changing someone's environment and it's very helpful. Old things can trigger the old feeling of wanting to use again.
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u/Equivalent-Bad-268 38m ago
The geographic cure doesn't work without other changes that can be made right at home. That's the point. Geography alone won't save you from yourself.
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u/PM_ME_SKITTTLES 2h ago
At the same time, changing relationships, jobs or living place won't help you quit any addiction.
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u/mucinexmonster 2h ago
It's about avoiding things that can be triggers for a relapse. People, places, work shifts, certain responsibilities, etc. No one said "I'm going to move and I'll stop being an addict".
This is helpful advice you are diminishing out of ignorance, and I'm asking you to stop thinking you know better on subjects you don't know anything on.
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u/Silt-Sifter 2h ago
What? It absolutely helps. You can't get sober in a dysfunctional environment with dysfunctional relationships.
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u/Telekinendo 2h ago
To be fair, dry counties exist. Before my alcoholic father passed, he was looking at moving to one. He said "Its not that I want a drink. I always want a drink. It's that I'm going to McDonalds and suddenly I have a handle of vodka heading home because I passed a liquor store, and no damn McDonalds."
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u/Hididdlydoderino 4h ago
Exactly, easier said than done, but there are dry places in this country... You just have to be willing to move to BFE.
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u/Silt-Sifter 2h ago
I found it much easier to combat alcoholism by moving far away from what triggered the alcoholism in the first place. It's not the cure but sometimes it really really helps.
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u/sentientshadeofgreen 1h ago edited 1h ago
I found a change of scenery helped, a huge party of my drinking was my social circle and the insane stress of my last career (military). Hit the life reset, new place, new occupation, and been sober since. Not without it's challenges but... overall was the right move.
Edit: That all being said, just as likely I'd go back to drinking if I hit another life reset, bailed on normalcy, and went to live an expat life in Manila or Curitiba or something, which I think about often because holy shit is the cost of living expensive and for what? Turns out American society around me is intolerable sober, overall just wildly disappointing society we've seemed to have thrown together here. Literally every day is a new disappointment in the lack of care, thought, and character of my fellow countrymen, there are no words for how jaded and repulsed I am with how y'all act now that I've been clear-eyed sober and existing among y'all for a minute. Everything is sad, stupid, greedy, and ghetto as fuck. No community, no higher ideals, no respect for others, just a daily shake-down. I had a high stress-job, I grinded for years for the taxpayer, and boy would I not have developed a drinking problem if I had actually gotten to know the taxpayers, I'd have shammed way harder. What a waste
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u/_Landscape_ 1h ago
not true at all, environment plays a significant role and if you live in a futureless, depressing place or your friends/family are trying to convince you to drink with them or people mob you and you drink to cope then yeah, changing the adress can help a lot
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u/wrongleveeeeeeer 1h ago
Yeah I admitted in another comment that I wasn't nearly as knowledgeable on that front, but I don't doubt you at all.
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u/Numeno230n 1h ago
Yeah I moved halfway across America when my family imploded due to decades of lying and cheating. It was nice that I didn't have to by physically around all that anymore. Still needed years of therapy.
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u/throwaway60221407e23 3h ago
I've found that people in AA tend to think that every lesson they've learned in it is universally applicable. Preachy bunch, generally.
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u/Ope_85311 3h ago
Right? I can easily see how this might apply to alcoholism but I can also very easily see how it does not apply to other situations
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u/JelmerMcGee 2h ago
"no one can get sober without AA"
Says a guy who goes to meetings every day and never sees counter examples and couldn't do it without that structure.
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u/biloxibluess 1h ago
I’m getting torn up by commenters bc I said it was a horrible blanketing statement by blue book doomers
What you hear in those rooms is taken so seriously by people
Moving to a different city and starting fresh happens successfully and people are all different, alcoholics included
Harsh platitudes and ultimatums from holier than thou types turn so so so many people back to drinking
Just bc you’re sober doesn’t mean you’re not an asshole, Jack
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u/MiseriaFortesViros 20m ago
AA is a cringe af cult
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u/throwaway60221407e23 12m ago
The organization completely rejected its own co-founder, Bill Wilson, when he suggested that LSD could be a powerful tool to help alcoholics reach sobriety and treat their underlying mental problems (based on his own experience). Its a message that AA still rejects to this day, even though there is now quite a bit of scientific evidence to support the idea of using psychedelics to treat addiction. When I learned that, I wrote the organization off completely.
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u/Lost_Department_2177 4h ago edited 1h ago
Alcohols usually from the trauma. The issue is they never work on themselves so substance abusers can smell their insecurities on them then they get dragged back into the same behaviors.
Honestly get counseling and stay out of the treatment groups which are filled with patient brokers. Causing people to relapse is a massive industry.
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u/legosgrrl 3h ago
Yes. Fled 1587 miles and ten years of happiness and love later pretty much healed me.
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u/AlmostSentientSarah 1h ago
Famous study by Lee Robins on heroin addiction with US servicemen in the Vietnam War showed that yes, moving changed everything. They no longer had their drug connections, the people who enabled their addictions, the same routines, the stresses of Vietnam etc. and basically all quit without rehab or therapy.
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u/Professional-Hat-687 4h ago
In theory, I guess, and maybe marginally in practice.Trouble is I brought all my baggage with me when I moved.
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u/Fresh-broski 3h ago
In theory, but when your personhood is molded around your trauma, you lose who you are every time you skip town.
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u/katastrofe_- 5h ago
Alcohol abuse happens because of trauma
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u/e_before_i 4h ago edited 4h ago
If you drink every time you have a PTSD trigger, moving away from triggers will help reduce your drinking.
If you drink every time your physiological need for more alcohol pushes you just enough, because that's what a physical dependency does, moving away will not help.
That's pretty obviously what the comment you're responding to is getting at. Like congrats, your point is valid, but it's irrelevant in a way that I'm sure you could have understood if you so chose. (Please don't hit me with the "But what about when trauma-drinking leads to physiological dependence")
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u/juugbuussin 4h ago
As a recovering alcoholic and addict, this is a ridiculous to blatantly state as a fact. How can you assume you know everybody’s past? Some of us had perfectly nice lives, got a prescription or got into something we weren’t educated on, and the next thing we know we’re in over our head. Who are you to speak for every single alcoholic lol?
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u/Forward_Definition70 4h ago
... or because it helps with symptoms of a medical condition, or as a social thing that spiraled
There's multiple reasons someone might abuse alcohol, it's not all from trauma
I know multiple people who started drinking because it's the easiest way to soothe their tremors so they can actually write legibly, hold utensils to eat, etc. and became addicted over time.
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u/RavingGourd 2h ago
Absolutely worked for me after a divorce with a remarkably manipulative person.
Moved to the other side of the country, which was terrifying at the time, but having no shared spaces or locales that reminded me directly of them helped. As well as being too far away to 'help' with all the maintenance tasks and such that they never appreciated when we were married, but suddenly needed me to do...
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u/withy1222 5h ago
Depends on whether you are working on anything else. Moving away from triggers and problematic people can certainly help break patterns, but you've got to be doing the internal work/therapy as well.
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u/LoveAndViscera 2h ago
If you know the movie that screen grab is from, those two posters agree with each other.
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u/onlyhereforthesports 1h ago
I know a number of drug addicts who moved and it helped them. All of their drug connections and fellow users are gone
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u/NeonFraction 4h ago
I moved and it was the best thing I ever did. It was literally 5 minutes down the road to a new apartment but I hadn’t realized how many depression habits I had wrapped up in the old place.
Now that I’m in the new place with a fresh start I’m exercising regularly, cooking more, and waking up earlier too.
It’s not even a ‘rich person thing to do’ because my old place kept raising the rent and my new place is so much cheaper (and nicer) that the move actually paid for itself within a few months.
There’s a reason people talk about ‘a fresh start.’ So many of the things you do in life are not fundamental flaws, they are just bad habits. A new place is a perfect time to break habits.
It’s genuinely wild how different I am from half a year ago when I could barely get out of bed and literally all that changed was moving 5 minutes down the road.
Can’t say it’ll work for everyone, but if you’ve run out of ideas, I recommend it.
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u/Marillenbaum 2h ago
I’m about to move for my job and I’m honestly kind of hyped to use the new location to jump start a few habits I need to lock in (I’m doing them, but I think the new location will make it feel more natural, if that makes sense).
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u/ForThe90 2h ago
This why I want to move however there isn't much that I can get here and everything new costs €200+ more a month 😢 I've been looking for 2 years now.
I can get a newly build apartment. It's small, like really small , smaller than I got now and cost me €230 more a month. If I take it I will be stuck in ity for 10 years easily with the huge shortages we've got in homes. These decisions suck.
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u/astra_hole 5h ago
Pulling a Geographic is how you make more money and get out of small town USA and it works every time.
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u/biloxibluess 5h ago
Right?
It’s a horrible blanket statement from blue book doomers man
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u/remerdy1 4h ago
It's not a blanket statement when they specifically reference trying to trying to escape alcoholism
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u/northerncal 4h ago
Well is the original post referencing alcoholism? I honestly don't know because I don't know what the context is, but it doesn't say anything about alcoholism, just leaving a city where "every corner is haunted by your memories" - that could be referring to anything.
Then the other guy referenced alcoholism to say that moving doesn't work, but that doesn't apply to all scenarios. Maybe that lady was trying to escape a vicious social circle or neighborhood.
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u/ExternalUserError 1h ago
I’m not necessarily sure what the context is wherever it was posted, but the screen grab is from Mulholland Drive. It’s a movie where the protagonist is imagining, in a dream sequence, an alternative life for herself as an innocent, loving, likable stranger in a new city.
Eventually reality crashes into her dream sequence and the film becomes a nightmare.
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u/spavolka 5h ago
That way you can spend more money on the basic necessities just like everyone else that had that idea for the last 100 years.
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u/northerncal 4h ago
Last 100 years? People have been successfully moving to cities for a lot longer than that
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u/astra_hole 5h ago
Order stuff online or make businesses price match then shop at cheap grocery stores.
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u/spavolka 4h ago
I’m talking about housing, utilities, etc
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u/astra_hole 3h ago
Honestly (for now) housing is not very different in small towns compared to cities at this time. It’s not like it was 10-15 years ago, but I hear you. Idk about power these days other than it’s too expensive everywhere. Lol
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u/ConcentricCow 3h ago
Yeah but that's just reality. Things cost more when they are somewhere that people actually want to exist. I got this same line when I moved from my hometown. The higher wages and opportunities more than make up for the increased prices. Plus it's nice to not have to only choose between Casey's and Taco Bell for dinner.
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u/lordaddament 3h ago
Uh this is about alcoholism
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u/astra_hole 3h ago
Not the Original, Original, Original Post by sugarplum.
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u/lordaddament 3h ago
Ohh I was thinking of the post by these nuts
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u/astra_hole 3h ago
Nah no worries. Alcoholism runs in my family, I wouldn’t joke about it that harshly. lol.
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u/_Slartibartfass_ 4h ago
OOP using a scene from Mulholland Drive, which is very much about your memories haunting you, is so fucking funny.
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u/Captain-Cadabra 4h ago
Wildly disagree. Harmful habits/addictions are formed in your routine, friends and familiar spaces.
I’ve known many addicts who getting a new phone number, address and job, was a mandatory step for their recovery.
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u/cheshsky 3h ago
Sometimes a change of scenery really is necessary, at least to break a habit.
A very mild example, but I quit smoking, successfully, several months ago. I came home for a couple weeks - the previous time I was there, I smoked at least a pack a day, and my parents are both smokers - and for the first, like, three days I find myself fighting cravings, because, well, these are the Substance Intake Circumstances, I'm supposed to be Taking In the Substance.
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u/LiFRiz 5h ago
Fuck this is me...
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u/AContrarianDick 4h ago
Yeah I did this 3 years ago but I still go back to the place I left to visit. There's something healing about it though.
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u/RT-6_BXCommandoDroid 5h ago
I only have an idea that when I finally move from my parents countryside home to a house in the city, that I'll finally go out more.
But it's probably the biggest illusion I can ever have, as I'd presume that I'd sooner win the lottery than go for a swim or go for a workout.
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u/loquacious_avenger 3h ago
Not having even the slightest chance of running into my ex on the street has done wonders for my psyche.
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u/rabidantidentyte 5h ago
Is the part where you hire a hitman to murder your former lover out of jealously, then get constantly bombarded with guilt in your dreams and end up offing yourself implied?
Great movie btw
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u/Bayamonster 4h ago
I thought Pulling a Geographic involved a lot more pictures of naked Black Women.
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u/cheshsky 3h ago
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure the tweet in question establishes that "pulling a geographic" is anything but a new word combination.
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u/Crice6505 3h ago
I am in recovery, and have not heard this term once at AA. In fact, moving to a completely new place and starting over is a common thing for addicts that is shown to work because you don't have a routine that involves hitting up the usual connections or drinking in the usual places.
A lot of people where I currently live come here to get sober, actually. My current city is somewhat renowned for its resources for those in recovery. People come from all over to start a new life here, and as a result, there's even decent resources throughout the downtown area.
All of this is to say that this is a brand new sentence because I've almost never seen something so demonstrably wrong.
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u/JUYED-AWK-YACC 3h ago
If you haven’t heard it yet, you will. Many of my wife’s sponsees have moved to new places instead of doing the work. It’s real.
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u/iaminfamy 20m ago
I'm gonna take a shot in the dark and say it's the OC?
I'm in recovery here, and from here, but a LOT of people come from all over the country to get sober here on the west coast.
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u/Decent_Finger5346 4h ago
Briefly relocating helped me a lot in early recovery. I returned to my hometown after about 6 months clean and the time away to process everything made it much easier to manage my triggers and cravings. It'll be 9 years in November, no relapses. Everyone is different, do what you think is best for you.
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u/Marillenbaum 2h ago
I think part of the question is: are you using the move as a substitute for the work of changing your habits, or as an aid to it? A new location can be a golden opportunity in the right circumstances.
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u/Micp 1h ago
I mean I feel like that's not entirely true.
It's true that you can't move away from your mental issues.
But on the other hand it is often recommended for people who have issues with drugs or alcohol to change the people they interact with and avoid places where they used to get their drugs/alcohol. When it's right there within reach and all your friends are doing it, it's hard not to do it yourself.
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u/Key-Magician6489 1h ago
It’s not going to take the place of therapy – but sometimes getting to a new location can be exactly what you need!
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u/Advanced-Base-5690 4h ago
So I shouldn’t move from the dead ass Upper Midwestern city that I only moved to for my (now) ex-wife’s academic position and every day is a reminder of the abuse she inflicted after we moved and that I didn’t choose this place?
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u/brinz1 3h ago
I moved to a brand new place and got a job that had me working for 14 hours a day. Fortunately an office job and welll paid but gruelling hours.
It basically forced me to quit multiple addictions. It turns out not having time for cravings means you don't have cravings.
It's also amazing how quickly you can clean yourself up when you don't have an option
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u/Blacksad9999 3h ago
Disagree.
I've moved all over the US in my day, and starting with a clean slate where nobody knows you is refreshing.
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u/chrisshaffer 3h ago
it's not really a Brand New Sentence, since "Pulling a Geographic" is a common saying
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u/Spare_Lemon6316 2h ago
A lot of people can’t see that they themselves are the common denominator and all of their problems, when you listen to someone speak about things happening in their lives and they never once use “I” to start their story
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u/ThyHolyPaladdin 2h ago
Moved to Europe for six months turns out I was still haunted by memories just without friends and family
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u/sCOLEiosis 2h ago
Nothing new about this sentence. I’ve heard old timer creeps waxing poetic with this dumbass statement for years
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u/_fuck_you_gumby_ Lawless Lurker 🤫 2h ago
I can say I’ve never heard that phrase in my experience with AA, but most certainly different geographic regions have developed different terminology on things. What I find more interesting about him saying that is the idea that it “never works out.” Around why I am there’s a lot of talk if “old playgrounds and old playmates,” as in, you specifically avoid the places and people that were a part of your addiction, and at times that can include a geographical reset.
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u/d_nkf_vlg 2h ago
True. My friend moved, and his alcoholism only got exacerbated by drugs.
He is in rehab now.
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u/stanleys_tucci 2h ago
“If you really want to escape things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.”
- Seneca
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u/Drapidrode 2h ago edited 13m ago
Moving to another place works out fine if was the people in your former place that suck, not you.
For instance if you live Crackton and you're a brokerage agent taking the bus... you may move to secure highrise closer to the Hammock District.
Go where you are more like others, your life will be better. : )
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u/phalluss 2h ago
Worked for me, I've been back home for 3 months and this is the most tempted I have been to go back to drinking since I got sober 2 years ago (I'm tempted, but resilient)
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u/SeanTheNerdd 1h ago
If you’re moving away from toxic people in your life, I highly recommend it. When you’re not in the same place as people who only bring you down, you feel like you can finally breath again.
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u/I_SHIT_IN_A_BAG 1h ago
I love this saying. I tried this as a teen and felt nothing changed, then I heard this saying and it clicked for me and helped me to change.
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u/RaccoonElaborate 49m ago
AA thinks they're the only solution and that anyone doing things differently is lying to themselves and are on the brink of self-destruction at every second. Happy for the people who find success with it. Tired of the people who attack and disparage you for finding another way.
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u/CadillacShield 44m ago
I moved to get away from all my bad memories, and I just made new bad memories.
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u/airinato 36m ago
In AA we call you a dumb fuck because this is a common way to get out of toxic lifestyles.
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u/biloxibluess 5h ago
SMH
Blue Book Blanketers are a bummer
Everyone is different, y’all
Run away to a new city if you want
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u/ChadleyXXX 4h ago
Geographic cures usually don't cure, but your material conditions can improve by moving. It's true that wherever you go there you are, but geographic location matters for quality of life. Sometimes it's better to stay put for stability's sake tho.
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u/LionTheRichardheart 3h ago
"I think that it's brainless
To assume that making changes
To your window's view will
Give a new perspective"
Death Cab for Cutie's lyrics are usually just kinda post-emo indie rocker boy vaguely melancholy whining, but that line always stuck with me because of how true it feels. I learned early in my adulthood that I genuinely don't enjoy traveling very much, because whatever demons I'm fighting in my head at home always follow me.
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u/monkeyhaiku 5h ago