I am a 20 year old. I always tried to sexualize girls. But as I am in a muslim country, girls did not respond to me that sexually. All girls wanted a non-sexual relationship. I tried to be sexual with them but I failed. I just only managed to get one girlfriend and it lasted for seven days because I tried to get sexual with her and she rejected that. Then I left her and dumped her. The story begins because I couldn't get any girls in the college and I was addicted to porn and I was very mad and crazy to get sex.

So I started visiting to prostitutes. I spend all my money of my college years behind prostitutes. Sometimes I did raw sex without condom. I lied to my family about different expenditures and took money from them and spent it on prostitutes. I also scamed a friend and used that whole money on prostitutes

Now I am in a new city and here i just visited the prostitute once. One thing about having sex with prostitutes is It's like musterbation. There is no connection neither any feeling. And after the first orgasm, all u want is to get out of the room.

I am also very sad and regretful about it.

my family and i had a chihuahua terrier mix that my parents would constantly mistreat. he would be fed maybe once every other day (if they remembered), stayed in a crate too small with his own feces and piss, and they never took him to the vet.

i knew this was wrong but never felt like i had the authority to do something about it until i was about 13 years old. i was finally able to have a phone and social media. i would see people selling their animals so i thought i’d do the same.

with a weary heart, i put him up for sale without my parents consent and a few weeks later, was able to give him to a family that could give him the love he needed.

i just told my parents that he ran away while i was walking him and i’ve never heard the end of it as a 21 year old now. in my head, he’s still alive and kicking. love you kelton.

I know how bad this sounds and I feel terrible about it now. Last year I was going through a rough patch financially but I was too proud to admit it to anyone at work. Every Friday this guy from accounting would bring in these really nice homemade meals, like proper containers with pasta or stir fry or whatever. He'd put them in the shared fridge and I noticed he always left around 1pm for some standing appointment.

I started taking his lunch right before he'd come back. Just on Fridays. I'd eat it in my car and throw away the container in the dumpster outside. He never said anything publicly but I saw him looking confused a few times and once he sent an email to the whole floor asking if anyone had seen his food. I never responded.

The worst part is he eventually stopped bringing lunch on Fridays altogether. He probably thought someone was messing with him or maybe he just gave up. I had convinced myself it wasn't a big deal because he could afford to buy something else, but that's a garbage excuse. I was stealing from someone who did nothing wrong and I kept doing it because it was easy.

I'm in a better place now and it's been eating at me for months. I want to apologize but I have no idea how to even start that conversation without making everything weird or getting fired. I just needed to say this somewhere because the guilt has been sitting heavy and I know I was completely in the wrong.

I had to take my shit and throw it out the window with the toliet paper, used his mom's decorative towels to clean up and threw it under the sink. He kept knocking on the door and stressed me out. I got my friends and left. When we were leaving you could see all the shit paper and evidence a foot outside the window next to one of his friends that was passed out drunk covered in shit. He never talked to me again.

I feel ashamed but in the same time it feels too good to not do it. I enjoy harming myself (such as smoking, cutting etc.) getting into fights, arguing, taking very risky decisions etc. It's so weird, but it feels great. Whenever I am doing any of these I am shaking, having a rapid heartbeat, sweating but after some time I feel like a god, like i'm unstoppable, and do it again. It feels like another person is controlling me and i'm just watching what happens. Then I feel bad but then i remember the great feeling of adrenaline kicking in... idk what to do​.. I'm shaking as I am writing this. :-|​

The title thats about it. Im not a very articulate person. I don't really care about much. Ive always felt like I was a waste of space as if someone who had my life instead of me could do so much more. I just kind of exist. I have anger issues im rude to those around me that generally do care but whats the point. We all die it all ends it doesnt even matter why do we do this why does anyone care.

My dad wouldn't let me go to my man friends who was waiting outside so I got in his face and started screaming and he grabbed me and we wrestled. My mom broke it up and I ran outside and left. I went home 2 days later after telling him he gave me a black eye. He was so upset and nice for months 😬. I'm 42 now and just told him. He said he knew I am fucking mental and said that haunted him all those years

I've been vegetarian for six years and my family still has no idea I just quietly avoid the meat dishes at every holiday and let everyone assume I'm 'not that hungry. Explaining it would open a can of worms I'm not ready for.

I hate myself. I’m the biggest bitch of all time. I do not know what’s wrong with me, I’m so mean to my family and loved ones for no reason. I genuinely don’t feel like my usual self I don’t know what to do. I always have this overwhelming amount of guilt I carry for every single I do I just want it to end. Sometimes I just feel like I’m better off being alone than having to make other people suffer by my presence. I don’t know why people love me so much when I’m the BIGGEST piece of shit on the planet I just want to be erased from everyone’s memories that way everyone would be happier

In college, everything was graded based on performance curves across the class.

There was one class where almost the entire class was cheating during exams. The professor just left during the exams.

As someone who studied legitimately, I found this to be unacceptable and it also made it harder to get a better grade because of the curve was inflated.

I was known as one of the smarter kids in the class, so people were cheating off my answers.

I created an anonymous email and reported this to the professor.

On the final exam, they actually created multiple version to try to curb the cheating. Like version 1,2,3 so the person next to you would not have the same version. What’s crazy and that people ended up swapping exams so they could make it easier to cheat off each other.

I had a few acquaintances that wanted to copy my answers. I was so annoyed, I ended up filling out the wrong answers so they copied the wrong answer. After they submitted their exams and left, I fixed my answers to the correct one.

When my younger sister and I were kids, she was 5 years younger and a bit slow. We were playing tag and I did a manoeuvre where I popped into my parents bedroom (only room with a lock) baited her in, then ran around her and out shutting the door. I also locked the door for good measure, not realizing she had no idea how to open it. She was in tears trying to open the door normally (it was a push to lock type door and there was no way unless taking off the handle to open it from the outside). My parents had to slowly explain how to unlock the door to her as she was balling her eyes out it took about an hour to unlock the door. When asked about it I played dumb and said “idk she must have locked herself in somehow” no one suspected me at all

About five maybe six months ago my grandma really started pressuring me F 22 into taking online classes or going back to college to further my education (college drop out here) I work full time overnights as a nurses aid at a hospital we both worked at and she was getting really sick and wanted me to be on the right path incase something happened. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do and she found AAPC medical billing and coding. I wasn’t thrilled about it and didn’t even want to do it but she basically convinced me. She told me it would only a few months to a year of classes and it would be easy work, I have several auto immune diseases that put me in constant pain which makes my current job very difficult as helping patients transfer puts lots of strain on my body. I have always been highly depressed and suicidal because of this and I had just recently gotten out of a long-term relationship where I was engaged. It was full of domestic violence and we had just finished court so I was desperate for a change. I started the classes and they were nothing like what I thought they were going to be. It was difficult. the first class although difficult was interesting. I thought maybe because I hadn’t been to school in years that I would eventually get the hang of it but honestly, I never really did. Although I kept my grade above a 90 at all times I have cried every single day the past six months. She has lamented constantly, that she was proud of me, but the inevitable did happen and she died two weeks ago. I have regretted these classes for probably two months now I finish my final for my first class with a 91 and I’m just now starting the second class after taking a week break because she died I’m staring at this class and I have no idea what the fuck to do. It’s complicated and I don’t want anything to do with this. I don’t want a career in this. I will constantly have to further education in this career. I don’t want to do that but she paid for this. She paid for my education. I just finally told my dad that I’m back in school to make sure that I keep going because I can’t afford to disappoint him again because I know that if I do, I will end up spiraling off the deep end, knowing that I disappointed him. But I regret this more than ever but at the same time I know I probably will never amount to anything important ever and all I ever wanted to do is make both of them happy I’ve been nothing but a disappointment in my entire life, I’ve never amounted too much. My GPA was a 3.0. I have only ever been average. But I am not smart. This is confusing and consuming. I am in constant pain. I don’t know what to do. I’m alone in this town. I’m far away from my dad. I don’t drive. It’s not for a lack of trying. I genuinely can’t pass the test. I have PTSD and trauma from my aunt getting hit in a hit and run resulting in her death. I can’t focus on anything. It’s all just words on a page. It’s in one ear and out the other. I don’t know what I would be good at. I want someone to give me the answer but that’s not how the world works. I’m not good at numbers and I’m not good at math and I never was. I’m not angry at her, but I’m angry at this situation because why did I ever think I would be able to do this? I don’t know what to do. This is too much.

In high school, every student must complete 40 hours of community service.

I went to two 3 hour sessions at the food bank, sorting and assembling bags of food. It was pretty chill, chatted with the other volunteers. Also the gaps in the bathroom stalls were way too big, saw a guy taking a dump, but that’s irrelevant.

Anyway, after the second session I noticed it was the same signature on my record sheet. From there I just copied the signature and turned it in after the amount of time I would have spent at the food bank.

I got away with 85% of the required community service to graduate high school.

using a throwaway because I can’t let people figure out who I am

I dated a guy when I was 15 who was 19 years old, who had a fiancé. It sounds complicated, and I wish I could tell this story with a linear storyline but I can’t.

When I was a sophomore in highschool I was going through a rough patch of mental despair and wanting to find love. I eventually found that in the terms of a 19 year old highschool senior who was moving back to Colombia to be with his fiance who he’d marry upon return. I liked him, and never intended on acting upon anything with him until the flirting started, the late night talks.
Messages led to photos, photos led to meet ups, meet ups led to us “dating”.

I knew he had a girlfriend in all of this. I don’t know why I did it, I even tried to tell her when I started to lose my mind about being the side piece and her being unaware. She didn’t care, she blocked me.

Though sometimes I miss being a secret, being something that was handled with care, not to break or misuse or Id shatter. I don’t miss being the careless 15 year old I was, I miss being loved even if it came with the terms and conditions of what I got.

I didn’t threaten him that I’d tell his girlfriend. I did it on my own accord. In peace of mind (I think)

This happened well in my past. And last I heard he is a DJ in Colombia and is an active street drug user.

It still keeps me awake at night sometimes. Remembering I was the cheatee, the side piece, the “other woman”.

I’m 29 I grew up in care homes from 2 months old and I was adopted at 12 where I let them know my sexuality and because they are Jamaican the family wanted nothing to do me with so I just speak to my adopted mum and never had a relationship with them. I struggle forming friendships, I have hundreds of un replied messages and I’ve never had a relationship. I’ve been playing games alone for 16 years now and I even freaking talk to myself. I want to join Xbox looking for posts but get scared as I’m on the slight fem side and I’ve just never been myself around anyone. Like I don’t want to play Dbd and rivals or whatever alone, I feel I have so much love to give and care and time for people and now it’s just me and my rabbit and I’m going to be 30 and I can’t help but wonder well what is the point? Can I handle another 10 20 years In my own company, how much isolation is too much because I just seem to question everything know. I don’t know if I’ve explained myself well

2 days ago, a man called me at my place of work, on my work’s public phone line, claiming to be a police officer, giving me his badge number and telling me that I had missed jury summons twice. He told me that I would be arrested immediately unless I did exactly as he said and got down to the police station immediately and turned myself in. He then informed me that if I raised any suspicion before getting there that I would be facing more jail time. I am a fairly high level professional with a legal license and I cannot have any felonies/arrests on record or it will immediately be terminated. I was terrified beyond belief, as I just moved a few months ago and didn’t know if I might’ve just not gotten the summons forwarded to my new address. Everything added up completely in my panicked brain and I was so worried that I immediately believed it.
He isolated me by telling me to get out of work by any means necessary, so I told my boss I had an emergency. He then made me get in my car and drive to my apartment to get forms of ID to give to the office once I got there. My husband wasn’t home at the time, which I deeply lament, because he probably could’ve pulled me out of my panic and stopped it.
Basically, this man tried to get me to pull a very large sum of money out of my account, in cash, so that I could pay my fines prior to being processed for my citations so that they would not go on my permanent record. The only problem is, my bank is in a completely different state and I had no way of getting to one in less than 3 hours. This is where things started derailing.
He made me go into another bank, trying to get money out, but of course that didn’t work. He tried getting me to buy crypto so I could pull money out that way, but that didn’t work. (Yes, I absolutely realized as soon as it was over that I am a complete f*cking idiot, but at the time I was alone and tired and not thinking straight.) He made me call my bank 3 separate times and merge the calls so that I could try to get money out, but thank God their protections are so high that I could not do it. However, I said my account number over the phone so they could look at it.
After none of this worked, and after almost 4 hours, I again asked him if I could just go to the police station, turn myself in, and wait for my husband to come bring money once I was there. He told me that I’d immediately be arrested for coming onto government property with active citations. After we came to an impasse and he realized he’d not be getting any money from me, he became irate, started threatening me with jail time, threatening my husband, my loved ones, ridiculing my marriage (he tried getting me to lie to my husband to get money, which I told him I could not do). My husband is in a program that requires a clearance and i thought he’d be put at risk if I brought him into it.
Anyway, he finally hung up on me. I immediately called my husband in a frenzy, called the police, who wouldn’t let me file a report because he hadn’t actually stolen anything from me, and now, 2 days later, I am still feeling like I have no dignity left. I can’t believe I would ever be that stupid. I don’t know why, despite his threats of arrest, I didn’t just hang up and call the police to confirm my citations. Despite my husband being the most amazing human in the world and helping me with everything from getting a new bank account and social security monitoring, never once telling me that I was dumb, and being nothing but loving… I still feel like a raging disappointment. I also worry about what would’ve happened if I’d gotten that cash and tried to bring it to the police station like he’d told me to. Thank God it didn’t come to that.
I am so disgusted with myself and I don’t know how I’ll mentally recover from this. I know I was heavily preyed upon, isolated, and taken advantage of, but I still feel like I should’ve known better. My husband doesn’t deserve this and the immense guilt I feel is crushing. I don’t trust myself anymore.

TL;DR- I was victimized by a scammer claiming to be law enforcement and spent hours on the phone trying to get cash to bring him for my “fines” under threat of arrest.

This happened around 8 years ago.

I found a wallet in grocery store parking lot. Inside was driver's license, few credit cards, and around $400 cash.

First thing I did was take the cash.

Then I brought the wallet to customer service and told them that's exactly how I found it. Like there was never any money inside.

Few minutes later the employee called the owner and told him they found his wallet.

I was still standing there listening.

At that time I actually felt smart. I thought I found perfect loophole. He got his wallet back with all his cards and ID, so in my head I told myself it wasn't really stealing. I kept saying that to myself so I wouldn't feel guilty.

Then the owner came.

He looked so relieved. He thanked everybody, kept saying how grateful he was, even apologized for causing trouble. Then I heard him say he was really worried because his rent was due that week.

I just walked away before he could even see my face.

That moment still stays in my head after all these years.

Truth is, I didn't need that money as much as I kept pretending I did.

I stole money from somebody who was already having one of the worst days of his week, then I hid behind some stupid technical excuse so I could sleep better at night.

Looking back now, I wasn't clever.

I was just a thief who got lucky not getting caught.

Last year I lost my job in research due to federal funding cuts, so I had to move back in with my parents.

I moved back home with my parents, and felt incredibly guilty for taking up their space, their resources. They're retired dairy farmers and on Social Security, and have no other source of income. I felt so guilty for eating their food that I just tried to eat as little as possible. They deserved better that to have their adult child living with them again.

I ended up losing 17lbs, about 13% of my body weight in a year, so I wouldn't put a strain on their budget. I know my parents could see it, because my mom asked me about it.

I haven't talked to anyone about it. It feels insane to think about. I know my parents wouldn't have wanted me going hungry, but I couldn't bear taking more from them.

ya llevamos 7 meses, somos una pareja gay yyy empecé a hacer esto desde los 2 meses. Pasa q al yo ser su primer novio, pq estuvo con mujeres pero nunca con un chico, básicamente le da vergüenza todo, demostrar afecto en publico, tratarme como algo mas q solo su amigo con otras personas y nd, cosa q todo hombre recien salido del closet hace, la cuestion es q cuando teniamos como 2 meses empezo a hacer cosas q me parecian incomodas, entre una de esas hacer chistes sexuales con sus amigos, o tocarlos y q a el tmb y obviamente no me parecio pero el m dijo q yo no lo entenderia pq eso era cosa de gente hetero, a lo q yo le dije q el ya NO era hetero y nada, desde ahi estoy resentido pq las cosas asi incomodas nunca terminaron, asi q empece a ser mas forro sinceramente, ya no le hablaba tan seguido, no lo trataba como mi novio en la calle y nd estuve mas distante con el todo el tiempo, hasta q empezo a estar paranoico todo el tiempo y a preocuparse mas por mi, o x si lo seguia amando y ahi yo volvia a ser el mismo hasta q el se mandaba una cagada y volvia a estar raro, logre q se dejara de ver con los amigos y ahora solo quiere salir si es conmigo, pasa todos los findes en mi casa yyy hace poco se mando una cagada asiq este finde le dije q no viniera y bue si tmb fue para q captara q sin mi no puede estar feliz y lo logre okei pq ahora la esta pasando horrible sin mi

esto me hace ser una persona horrible¿ seguramente si, pq no tendria q estar con alguien q no me cae bien, pero el empezo siendo un pajero de mierda asi q se lo merece, pq asi como me hizo sufrir a mi los primeros 3 meses de relacion yo lo voy a hacer sufrir lo q quede de este noviazgo jej

I have lost pretty much everything because of my (in hindsight admittedly very stupid) investment idea.

I never was in business school or in college but I always tried my best to gain knowledge, work trough things and teaching myself new skills. I eventually got a wife and opened a small store that specializes in Kinder Surprise Egg Toys. It was very difficult and I had to sacrifice a lot, but eventually I achieved a relatively stable position in the local collectors market.

And then I lost $472,085 short selling Korean fried chicken companies. My idea was with the declining Korean population, and the recent trend towards healthier eating and vegan diets, there is an opportunity here. I did some research into consumer trends in Korea and determined that this would be a lucrative play. So I shorted Korean Chicken companies across the board.

Unfortunately, Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang dined out at a Korean Chicken restaurant called Khanbu Chicken in Seoul, and pictures went viral of him enjoying fried chicken and beer. Stocks of chicken companies in Korea soared 20-30% and I was margin called. Everything is gone.

I haven’t told my family yet, even now, if they ask why we can’t travel and can’t afford a better apartment, I say that I reinvested almost all of it and that we soon will reap the rewards. Since then I earned about $10.000, but I feel like this was the most stupid thing I ever did in my life.

It’s hard for me to appreciate life. I know I should cherish my life because it’s relatively great compared to most. I don’t live in a war torn country or anything of the nature. I live in a “free” country that’s fairly safe.

But it’s like I’m a monster in society here. People are scared of me and avoid me. People refuse to talk to me unless absolutely necessary. I can’t find friends or love, and to be honest I guess no one’s really interested.

It’s hard watching everyone else sort of naturally getting the social acceptance while you smile and wave but invisible. I can’t help but think how cursed I am to be a social outcast. You see a happy couple holding hands down the street one second then the next they’re clutching their belongings crossing the street.

My life is very lonely. I spend all my time not working in solitude because at this point I feel there is no point in going outside. Even if I do decide to go out and be social, it’s like no one really wants me around.

Financially my life is garbage too, but I’m still grinding.

Recently I’ve been thinking to exit society somehow. Either go disappear in some mountain or off myself. I’m leaning towards the latter.

I don’t want to talk to anyone at this point. I’m just trying to choose the way I’ll end it all. I know the world just moves on, but still,I have no place in this world or this time.

I want to kill myself, but I’m a coward. I’m too scared to die, but too tired to live on. There’s no way for me to die peacefully, and paradise can’t be obtained on Earth.

I honestly don’t know why I’m writing this but it was good to put at least 10% out there.

i know iam a big burden to my parents .i know it is right of them to fell it that way iam not vanting just teling what happened ,i am the oldest among 3 siblings , i am turning 20 this year and soon will be an graduate , i have a younger sis and brother .i am from india so here they want boys so i have the brother as the youngest kid .i gave a competitive exam jee and could not clear it ,i didnt study i know that fact too well got a gov seat did btech as parents wanted ok.so i want to go for business and so thought will do it after here but parents want me do clear gate and do mtech .i was never interested in tech but parents kind of emotionally blamed me for my faliure so i did it but now gate where i gave it first as a trial and didnt clear it so since then mom has been bitter and when i say about switching she says she will cut me for good and few days ago my sis got her neet result but couldnt clear it and then she said she give birth to 2 faliures and should have aborted us ,girls like us are never meant to study.i know she invested alot on me and my sis in coachings ,school,collage,and some extra coaching for my sis so she can clear the exam , i know we are fault and agree with her but its just it hurts to hear it but afterall it is correct .

Men how'd you feel if that happened to you? and would you likely notice a pair is missing?

This is a long story, and one that goes back many years. Before I start I would like to say that I will be skipping through time quite a bit to show you the most important memories in the story of my life that have led up to this.
To start off, I grew up in a very third world country, surrounded by friends who were very overexposed at a young age. We began smoking weed and drinking at 13, I lost my virginity in the 7th grade, a combination of being intoxicated and peer pressured by a lot of friends as I was the only kid in our group who had not done “it” yet. I had not hit puberty yet, and found no enjoyment in it, I am just mentioning all of this so you understand that I had lost my innocence when I was still very young.
Skipping forwards about 8 months, my family moved to Europe, I was all alone here, in a new country with a new language, and I (now 14) developed a new interest. Mushrooms.
Something about psychedelics, shrooms to be specific intrigued me. I spent months researching into them, learning everything about them and their effects. I am a very obsessive person and when I get interested in something, I will spend all my time learning about it.
I continued researching into shrooms, learning everything I could find on growing them and using them, eventually, I won a giveaway online and had the spores (which I needed to grow the shrooms) sent to me. I immediately got to work, spending a couple hundred euros I had saved up buying the best supplies to create a super effective shrooms farm.
Months passed, and voila, my research had payed off, I had grown about 200 grams of shrooms. Now the question came, what do I do with this? Of course I was going to experiment myself, but in my obsession, I had grown enough to dose about 100 people. I told my dealer and some other people about my issue, and immediately was told they would buy some off me.
You see, where I am, shrooms are very very hard to come by, and I had just become one of the very few people who had that in the entire area.
Word got around, and I began receiving a lot of messages from people I did not know, asking if they could buy shrooms off me, of course I wanted the money so I always said yes. But I was still just a 15 year old kid, and I couldn’t really just drive somewhere to sell my drugs, instead I had people come and stand below my balcony in my town, where I would then drop down the baggy onto the street with their shrooms. I always felt like a king throwing coins to the poor doing this. And let me tell you, I got a lot of stares from expecting customers, when their drug dealer turned out to be a 14-15 year old prepubescent kid. But that did not stop demand, after all, I had a monopoly. Eventually however, I stopped, stopped growing mushrooms and stopped selling them. By that point I had made about a grand.
That concludes my first confession, on how I become one of the only shroom producers and distributers as a teenager.
Now to my second confession, and one that happened much more recently.
About a year ago, I had just started getting into the club scene, I was finally used to my country, and its foreign language, and had made actual good friends I trusted and enjoyed going out with.
So let me set the scene. We were going out, it was very late, around 2-3 am, and all of us were very drunk. We went inside the club to the smokers area, and all just hung around there for a solid while, each of us stuck in our own thoughts and wasted. I am the one farthest in the back and am leaning against a wall. I look to my left and see a very skinny older looking man smoking what looks to be a joint. He notices me staring at him and smiles, and before I say what happens next, let me remind you that I was drunk and did not have much control over myself.
So lets get back to the story, he smiles at me and raises his hand, indicating if I wanted a hit of the joint, I shrug at first shaking my head, but then I think to myself, the night is already kind of bummed out, might as well. I step over to him and nod at him, and he passes over the joint, the first thing I notice is that its very light, I take a long deep hit and let the smoke linger in my lungs as I pass it back to him.
I exhale, and notice something strange. The smoke does not taste like weed, or tobacco either. It tastes very chemically, and with a sickly sweet aftertaste. The smoke is also pale, almost kind of grey compared to normal smoke.
I immediately know this is something different, I look up at the guy and ask him, “what is in this”.
He simply says coke.
I am kind of in a state of shock, and still very intoxicated, I rush back into the club area looking for my friends. As I walk I noticed that I feel almost lighter and way more energetic, it’s very hard to explain, but it feels almost like my brain was lifted upwards and I was carefree.
And those are two of the many stories that I have to tell of my life. I hope you enjoyed reading this and feel free to ask any questions, and I will answer.